Jack Scholtz
@jackscholtz.com
he/him I am Jack Scholtz | KF | Movies | Video Games | TV
I was at a wedding one time and when the Cha Cha Slide came on, I naturally was going for it. Some 10 year old came up to me and said, “It’s Cha Cha real smooth. Not whatever this is.
I haven’t hit a dance floor since.
I haven’t hit a dance floor since.
December 16, 2025 at 5:03 AM
I was at a wedding one time and when the Cha Cha Slide came on, I naturally was going for it. Some 10 year old came up to me and said, “It’s Cha Cha real smooth. Not whatever this is.
I haven’t hit a dance floor since.
I haven’t hit a dance floor since.
It’s messed up they called it Pokemon and then made one called Slowpoke, and the word ‘poke’ is pronounced different in the two words.
December 7, 2025 at 12:26 AM
It’s messed up they called it Pokemon and then made one called Slowpoke, and the word ‘poke’ is pronounced different in the two words.
What age do people decide what kinda not-wearing-sunglasses person they are? I’m still deciding if I’m an “in the shirt” or “on top of the head” guy. I could never be a “back if the head guy” personally.
November 24, 2025 at 5:27 PM
What age do people decide what kinda not-wearing-sunglasses person they are? I’m still deciding if I’m an “in the shirt” or “on top of the head” guy. I could never be a “back if the head guy” personally.
Hey guys, Jack here.
If you set up a joke in one discord channel and then move it over to another for the pay-off without a single response, we’re the same kinda nasty.
If you set up a joke in one discord channel and then move it over to another for the pay-off without a single response, we’re the same kinda nasty.
November 20, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Hey guys, Jack here.
If you set up a joke in one discord channel and then move it over to another for the pay-off without a single response, we’re the same kinda nasty.
If you set up a joke in one discord channel and then move it over to another for the pay-off without a single response, we’re the same kinda nasty.
Hey guys, Jack here.
I just looked at a door to make sure I pushed on the correct side of it to make it open before approaching it, it worked and I didn’t make a fool of myself.
I just looked at a door to make sure I pushed on the correct side of it to make it open before approaching it, it worked and I didn’t make a fool of myself.
November 19, 2025 at 11:32 PM
Hey guys, Jack here.
I just looked at a door to make sure I pushed on the correct side of it to make it open before approaching it, it worked and I didn’t make a fool of myself.
I just looked at a door to make sure I pushed on the correct side of it to make it open before approaching it, it worked and I didn’t make a fool of myself.
You wouldn’t push a tush.
November 11, 2025 at 6:10 PM
You wouldn’t push a tush.
Every time someone blames an individual for the shutdown it sounds like a sports thing.
Chuck Schumer is going into 2 weeks of total shutdown, generational performance.
Chuck Schumer is going into 2 weeks of total shutdown, generational performance.
October 16, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Every time someone blames an individual for the shutdown it sounds like a sports thing.
Chuck Schumer is going into 2 weeks of total shutdown, generational performance.
Chuck Schumer is going into 2 weeks of total shutdown, generational performance.
That Sherlock Holmes movie score still rips.
October 8, 2025 at 7:19 PM
That Sherlock Holmes movie score still rips.
How many times do you think you could go around in a roundabout before a cop would pull you over?
October 4, 2025 at 2:47 AM
How many times do you think you could go around in a roundabout before a cop would pull you over?
If you buying Blue Shark gummies, I don’t trust you,
October 1, 2025 at 11:43 PM
If you buying Blue Shark gummies, I don’t trust you,
You think in London then got double decker ambulances?
September 19, 2025 at 9:06 PM
You think in London then got double decker ambulances?
Remember to clear your voicemail every now and then party people.
September 19, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Remember to clear your voicemail every now and then party people.
There's a lot of last names that end in "-win" but ain't no one got a name that ends in "-lose".
September 16, 2025 at 7:11 PM
There's a lot of last names that end in "-win" but ain't no one got a name that ends in "-lose".
It would be wild to be on a gondola and you get chatting to the person next to you and it's the Nintendo Direct Voiceover guy.
September 12, 2025 at 1:22 PM
It would be wild to be on a gondola and you get chatting to the person next to you and it's the Nintendo Direct Voiceover guy.
I haven’t met anyone that selects the power level on their microwave. Or if I have, they haven’t outed themselves. It should stay that way. I will go ape on that person.
September 11, 2025 at 10:12 PM
I haven’t met anyone that selects the power level on their microwave. Or if I have, they haven’t outed themselves. It should stay that way. I will go ape on that person.
I want there to be a movie where the spies that somehow get themselves on the giant party guest list get called out by the host. Like “I know who I invited to my party, who the hell are you!?”
September 6, 2025 at 1:41 PM
I want there to be a movie where the spies that somehow get themselves on the giant party guest list get called out by the host. Like “I know who I invited to my party, who the hell are you!?”
When we find it, do you think we’ll call it Delahere?
September 5, 2025 at 2:35 AM
When we find it, do you think we’ll call it Delahere?
Bro everyone is saying these defenses suck, but I’m only seeing them spit.
September 5, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Bro everyone is saying these defenses suck, but I’m only seeing them spit.
Is there a shampoo opera?
August 24, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Is there a shampoo opera?
Imagine thinking you’re the main character and you don’t have a Wikipedia page.
August 10, 2025 at 12:53 AM
Imagine thinking you’re the main character and you don’t have a Wikipedia page.
Bro it’s crazy Paul Walker died in a car accident. Like what if Robert Downey Jr. died getting into a Metal suit.
August 10, 2025 at 12:41 AM
Bro it’s crazy Paul Walker died in a car accident. Like what if Robert Downey Jr. died getting into a Metal suit.
They said, “don’t play with drugs.” Well, boy, are they gonna be shocked when they find me creating the greatest story of all time as my Superman figure, dragon Beanie Baby, and T-Rex are fighting a joint, bottle of perc, and baggie of coke.
July 28, 2025 at 8:59 PM
They said, “don’t play with drugs.” Well, boy, are they gonna be shocked when they find me creating the greatest story of all time as my Superman figure, dragon Beanie Baby, and T-Rex are fighting a joint, bottle of perc, and baggie of coke.
A cookbook that has accurate prep and cook times.
July 27, 2025 at 3:23 PM
A cookbook that has accurate prep and cook times.
Gonna open a bar called Double Bean. We serve expresso martinis with only 2 beans.
July 27, 2025 at 12:53 AM
Gonna open a bar called Double Bean. We serve expresso martinis with only 2 beans.