InfoSec Jester
@infosecjester.bsky.social
CyberSecurity, tech nonsense, cyber, general shitposts, ''evil'' ideas
he/him
he/him
Reposted by InfoSec Jester
A Father gets up
"Morning Son! Did you sleep well?"
The Son speaks
"If I ever slept, you would not have awoken. You need me to sustain life on your planet"
Evidently this outburst from The Sun caused life to be extinguished on the surface anyways, so rip
"Morning Son! Did you sleep well?"
The Son speaks
"If I ever slept, you would not have awoken. You need me to sustain life on your planet"
Evidently this outburst from The Sun caused life to be extinguished on the surface anyways, so rip
March 11, 2025 at 6:01 AM
A Father gets up
"Morning Son! Did you sleep well?"
The Son speaks
"If I ever slept, you would not have awoken. You need me to sustain life on your planet"
Evidently this outburst from The Sun caused life to be extinguished on the surface anyways, so rip
"Morning Son! Did you sleep well?"
The Son speaks
"If I ever slept, you would not have awoken. You need me to sustain life on your planet"
Evidently this outburst from The Sun caused life to be extinguished on the surface anyways, so rip
I migrated most of my standalone tweets. Let me know here if you find any that are broken
November 18, 2024 at 7:18 AM
I migrated most of my standalone tweets. Let me know here if you find any that are broken
Reposted by InfoSec Jester
Political parties determined by favorite variety of cheese
November 18, 2024 at 6:29 AM
Political parties determined by favorite variety of cheese
Someone flipping you the bird? Make bird shadow puppets at them
November 18, 2024 at 12:02 AM
Someone flipping you the bird? Make bird shadow puppets at them
If you find a penny on the ground, flip it heads down, and leave it there
November 18, 2024 at 12:03 AM
If you find a penny on the ground, flip it heads down, and leave it there
Crowdstrike teaches why you shouldn't test on production
November 18, 2024 at 6:51 AM
Crowdstrike teaches why you shouldn't test on production
Someone should make a game like Sword Art Online where instead of dying in real life when you die in game, you just have to re-purchase the game and start from scratch
November 18, 2024 at 12:03 AM
Someone should make a game like Sword Art Online where instead of dying in real life when you die in game, you just have to re-purchase the game and start from scratch
The real reason that cash is retired from circulation, is to make it more difficult to bring large sums of money back in time
November 18, 2024 at 12:03 AM
The real reason that cash is retired from circulation, is to make it more difficult to bring large sums of money back in time
"Shadow IT as a Service" or "ShITaaS" for short
November 18, 2024 at 12:04 AM
"Shadow IT as a Service" or "ShITaaS" for short
Skele-glow: Any time you break a bone or crack your knuckles, you light up like a glowstick
November 18, 2024 at 12:04 AM
Skele-glow: Any time you break a bone or crack your knuckles, you light up like a glowstick
I love notifying people of critical external vulnerabilities, especially when they flat ignore them, saying "it isn't an issue", only for them to get breached this exact way
November 18, 2024 at 12:04 AM
I love notifying people of critical external vulnerabilities, especially when they flat ignore them, saying "it isn't an issue", only for them to get breached this exact way
"I don't understand how they could have gotten in!"
Says the company running MS Office 2010 on all their endpoints, downloading all attachments, clicking on all links, and having an unpatched Exchange Server
Says the company running MS Office 2010 on all their endpoints, downloading all attachments, clicking on all links, and having an unpatched Exchange Server
November 18, 2024 at 12:05 AM
"I don't understand how they could have gotten in!"
Says the company running MS Office 2010 on all their endpoints, downloading all attachments, clicking on all links, and having an unpatched Exchange Server
Says the company running MS Office 2010 on all their endpoints, downloading all attachments, clicking on all links, and having an unpatched Exchange Server
People may fear the singularity as portrayed in fiction, but I fear the capitalistic nature of the race to achieve it.
A new war brews as each faction gets closer to their goal
A new war brews as each faction gets closer to their goal
November 18, 2024 at 12:05 AM
People may fear the singularity as portrayed in fiction, but I fear the capitalistic nature of the race to achieve it.
A new war brews as each faction gets closer to their goal
A new war brews as each faction gets closer to their goal
Capsaicin gummies for nasal decongestion
November 18, 2024 at 12:05 AM
Capsaicin gummies for nasal decongestion
[insert generic comic book rich guy villain monologue]
November 18, 2024 at 12:06 AM
[insert generic comic book rich guy villain monologue]
Dating app that records the face of the person swiping, sending you the reactions to your profile
November 18, 2024 at 12:06 AM
Dating app that records the face of the person swiping, sending you the reactions to your profile
New Policy: Only individuals with verified accounts will be able to post using the letter E
November 18, 2024 at 12:06 AM
New Policy: Only individuals with verified accounts will be able to post using the letter E
AI platform that actively harvests data from all available sources to generate convincing alibis for any situation
November 18, 2024 at 12:07 AM
AI platform that actively harvests data from all available sources to generate convincing alibis for any situation
Platform for publicly betting on when celebrities or other individuals will die. Payouts will be given to the users with the closest relative times
November 18, 2024 at 12:07 AM
Platform for publicly betting on when celebrities or other individuals will die. Payouts will be given to the users with the closest relative times
A virtual reality platform that allows users to experience the lives of others, but only by completely erasing their own memories and sense of self
November 18, 2024 at 12:07 AM
A virtual reality platform that allows users to experience the lives of others, but only by completely erasing their own memories and sense of self
Cannon Commuter: A rapid transportation system that involves shooting people out of cannons directly to their destination.
November 18, 2024 at 12:08 AM
Cannon Commuter: A rapid transportation system that involves shooting people out of cannons directly to their destination.
Starting next week, I will be implementing a "musical chairs" policy in the office. I will be removing one desk a day, as such, employees will be expected to arrive at work early. The last one to arrive each day will have a box ready for them
November 18, 2024 at 12:08 AM
Starting next week, I will be implementing a "musical chairs" policy in the office. I will be removing one desk a day, as such, employees will be expected to arrive at work early. The last one to arrive each day will have a box ready for them
Congrats Earth, reaching 8 Billion schmucks on the planet
November 18, 2024 at 12:08 AM
Congrats Earth, reaching 8 Billion schmucks on the planet
I apologize for that impending sense of doom you may have experienced earlier, that was just me testing something. Please carry on as normal
November 18, 2024 at 12:09 AM
I apologize for that impending sense of doom you may have experienced earlier, that was just me testing something. Please carry on as normal