work from home bodyguard
@igna.bsky.social
court appointed hype man, wretched fool that eats the scraps, tap water enthusiast. someones gotta monitor the situation
i was only out to run errands. they suckered me in with a free gift
January 4, 2026 at 10:35 PM
i was only out to run errands. they suckered me in with a free gift
i've been locked in psychic warfare with the olsen twins for over 20 years. i've been keeping their dark powers at bay, to keep you all safe. you only know a fraction of their power
January 4, 2026 at 1:21 AM
i've been locked in psychic warfare with the olsen twins for over 20 years. i've been keeping their dark powers at bay, to keep you all safe. you only know a fraction of their power
long exposure of the moon tonight
January 3, 2026 at 8:50 PM
long exposure of the moon tonight
now that stranger things is over, the creation of any 80s nostalgia piece is punishable by death
January 2, 2026 at 2:12 AM
now that stranger things is over, the creation of any 80s nostalgia piece is punishable by death
one hundred gigglebytes of silly clowns piling into my hilariously tiny hard drive
December 30, 2025 at 5:07 PM
one hundred gigglebytes of silly clowns piling into my hilariously tiny hard drive
JOI rogan be like 'okay jamie pull that up, then pull it back down again'
December 29, 2025 at 9:27 PM
JOI rogan be like 'okay jamie pull that up, then pull it back down again'
hey chocolate manufacturers i don't think you're using nearly enough palm oil right now. i think what your chocolate could use is even more delicious palm oil
December 28, 2025 at 10:31 PM
hey chocolate manufacturers i don't think you're using nearly enough palm oil right now. i think what your chocolate could use is even more delicious palm oil
my cousins son got some beyblades for christmas and they're absolutely pathetic now. tiny plastic imitations not fit for even the rats. made me want to get my monsters out, you ripped a beyblade in my day, you gambled your fingers on it
December 28, 2025 at 4:46 PM
my cousins son got some beyblades for christmas and they're absolutely pathetic now. tiny plastic imitations not fit for even the rats. made me want to get my monsters out, you ripped a beyblade in my day, you gambled your fingers on it
you gotta be nice if you want those TOYS
a
FES
TIVE
MESSAGE
from the BEAST E BOYS
a
FES
TIVE
MESSAGE
from the BEAST E BOYS
December 21, 2025 at 3:18 PM
i'm in your gaf filling up big bottles of popcorn right to the brim
December 19, 2025 at 7:39 PM
i'm in your gaf filling up big bottles of popcorn right to the brim
my beautiful wife, whom i love, just tapped out to my incredible submission hold. i've just won the world heavyweight championship from my lovely wife
December 19, 2025 at 5:32 PM
my beautiful wife, whom i love, just tapped out to my incredible submission hold. i've just won the world heavyweight championship from my lovely wife
powerbombing my fucking wife right through the altar and breaking her spine. calling the ref to count out my wonderful wife
December 19, 2025 at 5:30 PM
powerbombing my fucking wife right through the altar and breaking her spine. calling the ref to count out my wonderful wife
its the steam winter sale which means OUTER WILDS is 40% off. everyone should play the incredible video game OUTER WILDS
December 18, 2025 at 11:22 PM
its the steam winter sale which means OUTER WILDS is 40% off. everyone should play the incredible video game OUTER WILDS
i wrote ffvii_blazed over the course of a few weeks while i was incredibly bored and miserable at my council office job. back during a time when twitter was fun and people were doing interesting things w their accounts
x.com/ffvii_blazed
x.com/ffvii_blazed
December 18, 2025 at 8:58 PM
i wrote ffvii_blazed over the course of a few weeks while i was incredibly bored and miserable at my council office job. back during a time when twitter was fun and people were doing interesting things w their accounts
x.com/ffvii_blazed
x.com/ffvii_blazed
2026, we're being back roflcopter, we're bringing back smexy, we're getting rid of gooning and bringing fapping back. 2026, we're bringing back falling in love
December 17, 2025 at 2:02 AM
2026, we're being back roflcopter, we're bringing back smexy, we're getting rid of gooning and bringing fapping back. 2026, we're bringing back falling in love
we are charlie werk
we carry the slay
we carry the slay
December 16, 2025 at 2:20 PM
we are charlie werk
we carry the slay
we carry the slay
don't joke about soylent my reddit uncle died doing that shit
December 16, 2025 at 2:16 AM
don't joke about soylent my reddit uncle died doing that shit
what even are the "halcyon" days, shut up
December 15, 2025 at 10:45 PM
what even are the "halcyon" days, shut up
at the supermarket ramming people with my cart, just completely mowing them the fuck down
December 15, 2025 at 10:42 PM
at the supermarket ramming people with my cart, just completely mowing them the fuck down
straight up "watchin it". and by "it", haha, well. let's justy say. My pluribus
December 14, 2025 at 8:16 PM
straight up "watchin it". and by "it", haha, well. let's justy say. My pluribus
every wake up dead man character: ah yes, the Harlot Whore, the bane of our existence, the woman whom we hate, who drives our mission.
the harlot whore in question:
the harlot whore in question:
December 13, 2025 at 9:21 PM
every wake up dead man character: ah yes, the Harlot Whore, the bane of our existence, the woman whom we hate, who drives our mission.
the harlot whore in question:
the harlot whore in question:
happy to announce that the online release of wake up dead man has received a 30 minute standing ovation in my bedroom
December 13, 2025 at 1:26 PM
happy to announce that the online release of wake up dead man has received a 30 minute standing ovation in my bedroom
toshihiro nagosh might be one of the biggest haters on the planet. gang of dragon is such a devious lick
December 12, 2025 at 3:57 AM
toshihiro nagosh might be one of the biggest haters on the planet. gang of dragon is such a devious lick