5 perfect movies (in no particular order)
-The zombie movie I made with my friend Craig when we were 12
-Night of the Hunter
-Wet Hot American Summer
-The Night is Short, Walk on Girl
-I Saw the TV Glow
-The zombie movie I made with my friend Craig when we were 12
-Night of the Hunter
-Wet Hot American Summer
-The Night is Short, Walk on Girl
-I Saw the TV Glow
5 perfect movies (in no particular order):
-Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
-True Grit (2011)
-The Apartment
-Cure
-The Ring
-Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
-True Grit (2011)
-The Apartment
-Cure
-The Ring
5 perfect movies (in no particular order):
-Paper Moon
-High And Low
-All That Jazz
-Miracle Mile
-Broadcast News
-Paper Moon
-High And Low
-All That Jazz
-Miracle Mile
-Broadcast News
December 24, 2025 at 6:58 PM
5 perfect movies (in no particular order)
-The zombie movie I made with my friend Craig when we were 12
-Night of the Hunter
-Wet Hot American Summer
-The Night is Short, Walk on Girl
-I Saw the TV Glow
-The zombie movie I made with my friend Craig when we were 12
-Night of the Hunter
-Wet Hot American Summer
-The Night is Short, Walk on Girl
-I Saw the TV Glow
I think it worked, I’m feeling a lot better than yesterday. Pho and Collateral, it works.
I think I’m starting to get sick, so I’m going to try a remedy stolen from the gods themselves by Prometheus and given to mankind along with fire; eating pho and watching Collateral while wrapped in blankets.
December 24, 2025 at 12:22 AM
I think it worked, I’m feeling a lot better than yesterday. Pho and Collateral, it works.
I think I’m starting to get sick, so I’m going to try a remedy stolen from the gods themselves by Prometheus and given to mankind along with fire; eating pho and watching Collateral while wrapped in blankets.
December 22, 2025 at 9:09 PM
I think I’m starting to get sick, so I’m going to try a remedy stolen from the gods themselves by Prometheus and given to mankind along with fire; eating pho and watching Collateral while wrapped in blankets.
The way Pennywise runs at those kids is the same way that I chase my cats when I decide they need to play with me.
December 20, 2025 at 8:20 AM
The way Pennywise runs at those kids is the same way that I chase my cats when I decide they need to play with me.
So I gave that new Conjuring movie a shot…
December 20, 2025 at 6:53 AM
So I gave that new Conjuring movie a shot…
AI ads are really good at telling you what they think of you. A dolt who mistakes a roofing tile for a book, a husk who can’t figure out how to make an email sound sincere, a checked out father who can’t be bothered to engage with his child. They think nothing of you.
December 19, 2025 at 7:59 PM
AI ads are really good at telling you what they think of you. A dolt who mistakes a roofing tile for a book, a husk who can’t figure out how to make an email sound sincere, a checked out father who can’t be bothered to engage with his child. They think nothing of you.
The horrors are many, but I went to a women’s hockey game with my wife last night, and the lesbian energy of that arena has me glowing like the Chernobyl Elephant’s Foot.
December 18, 2025 at 7:12 PM
The horrors are many, but I went to a women’s hockey game with my wife last night, and the lesbian energy of that arena has me glowing like the Chernobyl Elephant’s Foot.
It’s always a treat to see Pruitt Taylor Vince in something. Absolute guy I love to see.
December 15, 2025 at 4:31 AM
It’s always a treat to see Pruitt Taylor Vince in something. Absolute guy I love to see.
The plot of Kairo, except instead of ghosts bridging the divide between the living and dead with the internet, they begin killing through chiropracty. The rest of the plot is exactly the same.
(If I’m misremembering Kairo, shut up, I haven’t seen it since 2020)
(If I’m misremembering Kairo, shut up, I haven’t seen it since 2020)
December 15, 2025 at 1:05 AM
The plot of Kairo, except instead of ghosts bridging the divide between the living and dead with the internet, they begin killing through chiropracty. The rest of the plot is exactly the same.
(If I’m misremembering Kairo, shut up, I haven’t seen it since 2020)
(If I’m misremembering Kairo, shut up, I haven’t seen it since 2020)
I was just struck with a vision, a bone deep certainty, that if Musk was actually able to make the trip to mars (he won’t), the last thing he would say before leaving earth forever would be “so long and thanks for all the fish.” Because he’s a gigantic predictable loser.
December 11, 2025 at 7:16 AM
I was just struck with a vision, a bone deep certainty, that if Musk was actually able to make the trip to mars (he won’t), the last thing he would say before leaving earth forever would be “so long and thanks for all the fish.” Because he’s a gigantic predictable loser.
Do you think pokemon miss the appendages they lose when they evolve? Do you think that when they grow new limbs, they are horrified by them? Do they get dysmorphia?
December 10, 2025 at 3:41 AM
Do you think pokemon miss the appendages they lose when they evolve? Do you think that when they grow new limbs, they are horrified by them? Do they get dysmorphia?
I’ve recently discovered that Milk Duds are delicious, but every time I eat one I think of the line “my nipples look like Milk Duds” from Kung Pow
December 9, 2025 at 11:34 PM
I’ve recently discovered that Milk Duds are delicious, but every time I eat one I think of the line “my nipples look like Milk Duds” from Kung Pow
Swallowed a migraine pill bad and threw up about it
December 9, 2025 at 11:02 PM
Swallowed a migraine pill bad and threw up about it
Man, tacticool design really peaked with the SAS gas mask and MP5 look. Digital camo, quad tube NODs, suppressed M4s? Dogshit. Trying too hard. Go crash a billion dollar chopper into an SID safe house. Give me spooky guys dressed like Hunk any day. This has been Ellie’s gun nerd corner.
December 9, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Man, tacticool design really peaked with the SAS gas mask and MP5 look. Digital camo, quad tube NODs, suppressed M4s? Dogshit. Trying too hard. Go crash a billion dollar chopper into an SID safe house. Give me spooky guys dressed like Hunk any day. This has been Ellie’s gun nerd corner.
If presented with a time machine, the biggest dilemma I would have is whether I want to steal credit for the Akira slide or the Oldboy hallway fight.
December 8, 2025 at 12:31 AM
If presented with a time machine, the biggest dilemma I would have is whether I want to steal credit for the Akira slide or the Oldboy hallway fight.
I think every cop show should have Mulder and Scully show up for an episode and fuck around like it’s the 1990s. Like 911 or Chicago PD or whatever’s out there should have a case that’s a little weird, and then BAM, it’s the x-files now. Someone gets disappeared, nothing is resolved on screen.
December 8, 2025 at 12:15 AM
I think every cop show should have Mulder and Scully show up for an episode and fuck around like it’s the 1990s. Like 911 or Chicago PD or whatever’s out there should have a case that’s a little weird, and then BAM, it’s the x-files now. Someone gets disappeared, nothing is resolved on screen.
Movie you've watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel.
“We are still friends, right?”
[10 seconds of silent rage]
“… ha, yeah.”
“We are still friends, right?”
[10 seconds of silent rage]
“… ha, yeah.”
December 7, 2025 at 11:15 PM
Movie you've watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars nor Trek), LOTR, or Marvel.
“We are still friends, right?”
[10 seconds of silent rage]
“… ha, yeah.”
“We are still friends, right?”
[10 seconds of silent rage]
“… ha, yeah.”
It’s incredible how much better Wizard People: Dear Reader is than anything Rowling ever wrote. That hack could never come up with something as sublime as “Ed Vanders, like a scarecrow’s corpse, rushes in.”
December 7, 2025 at 6:18 AM
It’s incredible how much better Wizard People: Dear Reader is than anything Rowling ever wrote. That hack could never come up with something as sublime as “Ed Vanders, like a scarecrow’s corpse, rushes in.”
I’ve been rereading The Haunting of Hill House before bed lately, and I’m really enjoying telling my wife about the scary parts after we turn out the lights.
December 5, 2025 at 10:53 PM
I’ve been rereading The Haunting of Hill House before bed lately, and I’m really enjoying telling my wife about the scary parts after we turn out the lights.
When dealing with transphobes, remember:
❌ Make your haters your waiters at the table of success
✅ Make them trans! 💖
❌ Make your haters your waiters at the table of success
✅ Make them trans! 💖
December 5, 2025 at 6:08 PM
When dealing with transphobes, remember:
❌ Make your haters your waiters at the table of success
✅ Make them trans! 💖
❌ Make your haters your waiters at the table of success
✅ Make them trans! 💖
I got a new haircut today and I really like the side bits!
December 4, 2025 at 9:04 PM
I got a new haircut today and I really like the side bits!
Did you know there is nothing stopping you from changing your full name to the recipe and wiring instructions for a car bomb? It’s true and legal!
December 3, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Did you know there is nothing stopping you from changing your full name to the recipe and wiring instructions for a car bomb? It’s true and legal!
My New Year’s resolution for 2026 will be to be meaner to cis people.
December 3, 2025 at 6:27 PM
My New Year’s resolution for 2026 will be to be meaner to cis people.
I haven’t watched any Pluribus yet, but I’m really enjoying the reactions I’m getting to calling it “Plurb.”
December 3, 2025 at 6:22 AM
I haven’t watched any Pluribus yet, but I’m really enjoying the reactions I’m getting to calling it “Plurb.”
Me whenever a British person says across the pond: heh, that’s not a pond. Ponds are little and the pacific is big 😏
December 1, 2025 at 6:21 PM
Me whenever a British person says across the pond: heh, that’s not a pond. Ponds are little and the pacific is big 😏