if I don't get a lil treat I will hurt myself and others
November 3, 2025 at 8:29 PM
if I don't get a lil treat I will hurt myself and others
My annual twilight run has really brought my husband and I closer.
He was painting his minis and whispered,
“Ya know, Carlisle is actually the hottest”.
I married well.
He was painting his minis and whispered,
“Ya know, Carlisle is actually the hottest”.
I married well.
October 13, 2025 at 2:06 AM
My annual twilight run has really brought my husband and I closer.
He was painting his minis and whispered,
“Ya know, Carlisle is actually the hottest”.
I married well.
He was painting his minis and whispered,
“Ya know, Carlisle is actually the hottest”.
I married well.
My favorite animal is a boy with fireworks and his benevolent ruling queen in a lawn chair sipping iced tea while he puts grass in his shoes just like he used to
July 24, 2025 at 5:03 PM
My favorite animal is a boy with fireworks and his benevolent ruling queen in a lawn chair sipping iced tea while he puts grass in his shoes just like he used to
It cant be wrong if there is a banana involved
July 24, 2025 at 5:02 PM
It cant be wrong if there is a banana involved
Me, Deep Luteal: please sir Mr Crow Im one of the good ones. Remember I did you no harm when you see my face again.
Me: High Ovulation: I could take 10, 000 crows in a parking lot.
Me: High Ovulation: I could take 10, 000 crows in a parking lot.
July 11, 2025 at 11:08 AM
Me, Deep Luteal: please sir Mr Crow Im one of the good ones. Remember I did you no harm when you see my face again.
Me: High Ovulation: I could take 10, 000 crows in a parking lot.
Me: High Ovulation: I could take 10, 000 crows in a parking lot.
Wait. what. both of those men were Michael B Jordan.?
May 17, 2025 at 5:42 PM
Wait. what. both of those men were Michael B Jordan.?
I am committing right here and now to shave my head on my 50th birthday. I want to fear something else more than being old and then feel fearless in the face of aging.
I will continue to use retinol cream because radical acceptance is yet entered the chat.
I will continue to use retinol cream because radical acceptance is yet entered the chat.
May 7, 2025 at 9:16 PM
I am committing right here and now to shave my head on my 50th birthday. I want to fear something else more than being old and then feel fearless in the face of aging.
I will continue to use retinol cream because radical acceptance is yet entered the chat.
I will continue to use retinol cream because radical acceptance is yet entered the chat.
I just realized Im gonna be the one to give my nephew his first Scobi. I will be his Kombucha Aunt. He is gonna ask me to come over and inspect his first colony. I get to give him life and have a hot body, I truly am a lucky woman I cannot imagine a greater role to play.
May 7, 2025 at 5:02 AM
I just realized Im gonna be the one to give my nephew his first Scobi. I will be his Kombucha Aunt. He is gonna ask me to come over and inspect his first colony. I get to give him life and have a hot body, I truly am a lucky woman I cannot imagine a greater role to play.
My little sister when she saw her first black man at Chillis in 2005
May 2, 2025 at 6:29 PM
My little sister when she saw her first black man at Chillis in 2005
I SAW 9 mf BLUEBIRDS IN 3 DAYS!?
April 27, 2025 at 3:30 AM
I SAW 9 mf BLUEBIRDS IN 3 DAYS!?
When I was a little kid I always dreamed of being the one to grow the antibiotic resistant superbug that would end everything right in my tummy.
April 24, 2025 at 9:11 PM
When I was a little kid I always dreamed of being the one to grow the antibiotic resistant superbug that would end everything right in my tummy.
Not all of these things can truly be game changers
April 24, 2025 at 9:10 PM
Not all of these things can truly be game changers
Do you believe in fairies?
*read like do you believe in the power of a curse*
*read like do you believe in the power of a curse*
April 20, 2025 at 5:20 AM
Do you believe in fairies?
*read like do you believe in the power of a curse*
*read like do you believe in the power of a curse*
My most special skill is trying the hardest of any human to have ever lived to not hang up on customer service helper too early and cut off their cheerful "goodbye" but cutting them off
Every.
Single.
Time.
Every.
Single.
Time.
April 18, 2025 at 11:25 PM
My most special skill is trying the hardest of any human to have ever lived to not hang up on customer service helper too early and cut off their cheerful "goodbye" but cutting them off
Every.
Single.
Time.
Every.
Single.
Time.
Id get severed and abandon my outie to shoot my shot at Milchick
April 16, 2025 at 10:40 PM
Id get severed and abandon my outie to shoot my shot at Milchick
The sexual tension on this show was palpable.
March 28, 2025 at 6:52 PM
The sexual tension on this show was palpable.
I really dont want kids but I am so sad I will never be able to give someone a "stern talking to". Ive always wanted to use my mom voice. Maybe my nephew will do a huge screw up🤞
March 25, 2025 at 6:29 PM
I really dont want kids but I am so sad I will never be able to give someone a "stern talking to". Ive always wanted to use my mom voice. Maybe my nephew will do a huge screw up🤞
My soap opera is the kombucha subreddit. #scobimommie
March 21, 2025 at 8:47 PM
My soap opera is the kombucha subreddit. #scobimommie
This has all the makings of a violent ending.
I finally got my freaking autobiography title I really feel this is the one.
I finally got my freaking autobiography title I really feel this is the one.
March 16, 2025 at 7:37 AM
This has all the makings of a violent ending.
I finally got my freaking autobiography title I really feel this is the one.
I finally got my freaking autobiography title I really feel this is the one.
I see a bright source of light in front of me like a flashlight or a lamp and my eyes go straight for it like a bug.
Why?? How do I stop this? I look away and its too late?
Why?? How do I stop this? I look away and its too late?
March 16, 2025 at 7:37 AM
I see a bright source of light in front of me like a flashlight or a lamp and my eyes go straight for it like a bug.
Why?? How do I stop this? I look away and its too late?
Why?? How do I stop this? I look away and its too late?
Just a Tres Leches gourl looking for a Flanboy (ant) love like the moovies
February 13, 2025 at 5:04 AM
Just a Tres Leches gourl looking for a Flanboy (ant) love like the moovies
A small socially awkward lizard got rizz and became president remember that
January 31, 2025 at 6:52 PM
A small socially awkward lizard got rizz and became president remember that
Getting married and hooked to the IV of love for life should I take his last name or take the surname NIGHTHAWK or research my lineage as far back as possible and take the oldest last name I can find?
January 27, 2025 at 2:31 AM
Getting married and hooked to the IV of love for life should I take his last name or take the surname NIGHTHAWK or research my lineage as far back as possible and take the oldest last name I can find?
Me on a Sunday night when I remember by best friend from third grade exists somewhere in the world and is just as soft as me and we don't have each others phone numbers: open.spotify.com/track/5gJw9D...
God Turn Me Into a Flower
Weyes Blood · And In The Darkness, Hearts Aglow · Song · 2022
open.spotify.com
January 27, 2025 at 2:29 AM
Me on a Sunday night when I remember by best friend from third grade exists somewhere in the world and is just as soft as me and we don't have each others phone numbers: open.spotify.com/track/5gJw9D...
Your dress waving in the wind.
This.
is the only flag I love.
-Ahmad Nadalizadeh
This.
is the only flag I love.
-Ahmad Nadalizadeh
January 25, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Your dress waving in the wind.
This.
is the only flag I love.
-Ahmad Nadalizadeh
This.
is the only flag I love.
-Ahmad Nadalizadeh