Halbert “Hal” Simpson
@halbertsimpson.bsky.social
Bed tibe rn (23:12 GMT 15th February 2024)
~ Studying maffs @ Keele
~ he/him, born 2002, my skeets are lighthearted
~ Peace And Love 💚
~ Art: @halbartsimpson.bsky.social
~ Studying maffs @ Keele
~ he/him, born 2002, my skeets are lighthearted
~ Peace And Love 💚
~ Art: @halbartsimpson.bsky.social
I'm an expert at regurgitating the skins of baked beans.
February 23, 2024 at 12:09 PM
I'm an expert at regurgitating the skins of baked beans.
AM I POPS FROM REGULAR SHOW!?!?!?
February 17, 2024 at 8:46 AM
AM I POPS FROM REGULAR SHOW!?!?!?
I think about the last lyric of Big Brother by Stevie Wonder a lot.
February 16, 2024 at 2:49 PM
I think about the last lyric of Big Brother by Stevie Wonder a lot.
I just learned that it's impossible to burp while there is pizza actively making its way down your gullet. I was trying so hard but it just wouldn't come out. Interesting.
February 15, 2024 at 9:59 PM
I just learned that it's impossible to burp while there is pizza actively making its way down your gullet. I was trying so hard but it just wouldn't come out. Interesting.
They should get MrBeast on Bluesky. He'd do numbers here.
February 15, 2024 at 7:20 PM
They should get MrBeast on Bluesky. He'd do numbers here.
I had got to the point where I was braindead bored-out-my-mind clicking through tabs on google chrome in my dream trying to find anything interesting to do, before using sheer willpower to wake myself up at 04:15. I am so real for this.
February 15, 2024 at 4:15 AM
I had got to the point where I was braindead bored-out-my-mind clicking through tabs on google chrome in my dream trying to find anything interesting to do, before using sheer willpower to wake myself up at 04:15. I am so real for this.
Every time my little brother gets 3 wins over me in any game, he’ll say “This reminds me of the time we played Melee in France.”
He beat me like 15-30 times in a row as Luigi. He was 6 years old.
He’s so real for this.
He beat me like 15-30 times in a row as Luigi. He was 6 years old.
He’s so real for this.
February 14, 2024 at 10:35 PM
Every time my little brother gets 3 wins over me in any game, he’ll say “This reminds me of the time we played Melee in France.”
He beat me like 15-30 times in a row as Luigi. He was 6 years old.
He’s so real for this.
He beat me like 15-30 times in a row as Luigi. He was 6 years old.
He’s so real for this.
Nothing’s hot nobody’s hot sex isn’t real I’m returning to the world where private parts are for doing wees and nothing else
I wish I could save drafts right about now. This skeet would go hard sitting in a vault for all time.
I wish I could save drafts right about now. This skeet would go hard sitting in a vault for all time.
February 14, 2024 at 10:09 AM
Nothing’s hot nobody’s hot sex isn’t real I’m returning to the world where private parts are for doing wees and nothing else
I wish I could save drafts right about now. This skeet would go hard sitting in a vault for all time.
I wish I could save drafts right about now. This skeet would go hard sitting in a vault for all time.
Today I got to tell someone that they share a birthday with Hatsune Miku. So, it's been a pretty good day.
February 13, 2024 at 4:18 PM
Today I got to tell someone that they share a birthday with Hatsune Miku. So, it's been a pretty good day.
For the record, my profile picture is of the front of my head.
February 12, 2024 at 9:21 PM
For the record, my profile picture is of the front of my head.
They should get Anthony Fantano on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
February 12, 2024 at 7:23 AM
They should get Anthony Fantano on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
Is it communist to think Elon Musk should be earning the same amount as my Dad? I think they have equally difficult jobs and work equally hard but my Dad is better at his job and is a better dad but that’s neither here nor there.
February 11, 2024 at 4:40 PM
Is it communist to think Elon Musk should be earning the same amount as my Dad? I think they have equally difficult jobs and work equally hard but my Dad is better at his job and is a better dad but that’s neither here nor there.
They should get Jimmy Carr on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
February 11, 2024 at 12:54 PM
They should get Jimmy Carr on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
The drawing I just skeeted? The one of Ponyo? That's my big draw for this semester. Don't expect anything that extravagant from me for a while. If I did drawings that good all the time, my bones would crumble and I'd only get 60% in Fluid Mechanics.
February 11, 2024 at 11:53 AM
The drawing I just skeeted? The one of Ponyo? That's my big draw for this semester. Don't expect anything that extravagant from me for a while. If I did drawings that good all the time, my bones would crumble and I'd only get 60% in Fluid Mechanics.
So what happens to that dress Ponyo wears? I mean, obviously she can take it off, but it's the dress she manifested in. It's her birthday suit. Does she wear it all the time, or only on choice occasions? She surely can't throw it away once she's grown out of it, right?
February 10, 2024 at 9:54 PM
So what happens to that dress Ponyo wears? I mean, obviously she can take it off, but it's the dress she manifested in. It's her birthday suit. Does she wear it all the time, or only on choice occasions? She surely can't throw it away once she's grown out of it, right?
I'm being GATEKEPT by the sink. It is PREVENTING me from eating anything other than pizza. It's a pizza weekend and it's the fault of the kitchen sink. It's clogged so I can't clean my crocks and cutlery. I have to eat pizza for days on end. Pizza Friday is working overtime.
February 10, 2024 at 6:29 PM
I'm being GATEKEPT by the sink. It is PREVENTING me from eating anything other than pizza. It's a pizza weekend and it's the fault of the kitchen sink. It's clogged so I can't clean my crocks and cutlery. I have to eat pizza for days on end. Pizza Friday is working overtime.
I have previously claimed that Stevie Wonder may have written "He's Misstra Know-It-All" about Richard Nixon, but I can think of another disgraced former president of the United States that the song is ACTUALLY about. As a clue, his name is something that comes out your bottom.
February 10, 2024 at 5:32 PM
I have previously claimed that Stevie Wonder may have written "He's Misstra Know-It-All" about Richard Nixon, but I can think of another disgraced former president of the United States that the song is ACTUALLY about. As a clue, his name is something that comes out your bottom.
I could keep this joke up for a whole month tbh. I love skeeting the same thing over and over again.
February 10, 2024 at 2:41 PM
I could keep this joke up for a whole month tbh. I love skeeting the same thing over and over again.
They should get Reggie Fils-Aimé on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
February 10, 2024 at 2:40 PM
They should get Reggie Fils-Aimé on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
Arlo saying "datum" in his new Switch 2 video is exactly what I needed in my life. It's true: "datum" is the singular of "data".
February 10, 2024 at 9:02 AM
Arlo saying "datum" in his new Switch 2 video is exactly what I needed in my life. It's true: "datum" is the singular of "data".
They should get Joe Biden on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
February 10, 2024 at 7:56 AM
They should get Joe Biden on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
This is me and my homies. This is my squad. We’re all here.
February 9, 2024 at 11:38 PM
This is me and my homies. This is my squad. We’re all here.
They should get SimpleFlips on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
February 9, 2024 at 11:21 PM
They should get SimpleFlips on Bluesky. He’d do numbers here.
I WAS NOT JOKING WHEN I SAID I WAS IN MY PROPHET ERA.
MY STOMACH SCOURED THE COSMOS FOR THIS INFORMATION LONG BEFORE I HAD EVER SEEN IT.
THE FIRST DAY OF MY ENTIIIIRE LIFE I GOT MEAT CRAVINGS.
HOW!?!?!?
MY STOMACH SCOURED THE COSMOS FOR THIS INFORMATION LONG BEFORE I HAD EVER SEEN IT.
THE FIRST DAY OF MY ENTIIIIRE LIFE I GOT MEAT CRAVINGS.
HOW!?!?!?
February 9, 2024 at 6:45 PM
I WAS NOT JOKING WHEN I SAID I WAS IN MY PROPHET ERA.
MY STOMACH SCOURED THE COSMOS FOR THIS INFORMATION LONG BEFORE I HAD EVER SEEN IT.
THE FIRST DAY OF MY ENTIIIIRE LIFE I GOT MEAT CRAVINGS.
HOW!?!?!?
MY STOMACH SCOURED THE COSMOS FOR THIS INFORMATION LONG BEFORE I HAD EVER SEEN IT.
THE FIRST DAY OF MY ENTIIIIRE LIFE I GOT MEAT CRAVINGS.
HOW!?!?!?
I have meat cravings??? What the hell??? Is this what 6 weeks with no meat does to a guy?????
February 9, 2024 at 3:08 PM
I have meat cravings??? What the hell??? Is this what 6 weeks with no meat does to a guy?????