Leah 🦇
@haelvv.bsky.social
She/her, 30s, Minneapolis, nerd adjacent, it’s been 20 years and I can’t get off the internet 🌝🌻🌾
I give advice to my 20yo brother like “not everything needs to be So Much Pressure” even though there hasn’t been a day in my life that I’ve convinced myself that not everything needs to be So Much Pressure
November 12, 2025 at 2:16 AM
I give advice to my 20yo brother like “not everything needs to be So Much Pressure” even though there hasn’t been a day in my life that I’ve convinced myself that not everything needs to be So Much Pressure
I want to find a new job soon and was stressing bc I don’t feel like I have a ton of resources. and then remembered I’m a whole ass grad student 🫵🏼🤦🏻♀️ and that’s like, half the point
November 4, 2025 at 6:09 PM
I want to find a new job soon and was stressing bc I don’t feel like I have a ton of resources. and then remembered I’m a whole ass grad student 🫵🏼🤦🏻♀️ and that’s like, half the point
corporate america been eating away at my will to live but at least there’s an animal crossing update in January
October 31, 2025 at 8:03 PM
corporate america been eating away at my will to live but at least there’s an animal crossing update in January
me whenever I’m taking my solitary lunchtime skyway walk: probably none of these people know I can do 5-7 chin ups
October 29, 2025 at 5:32 PM
me whenever I’m taking my solitary lunchtime skyway walk: probably none of these people know I can do 5-7 chin ups
in my youth I always wondered why the childless adults I knew kept waking hours of like 4:30AM-8:30PM and now fully I get it. divine
October 24, 2025 at 12:15 PM
in my youth I always wondered why the childless adults I knew kept waking hours of like 4:30AM-8:30PM and now fully I get it. divine
unless it’s like, life or death, whenever I get a notification from one of my brothers with a chat screenshot between him and my mom I am dropping everything so fast. I’m sat, I’m taking notes, I’m locked in
October 16, 2025 at 5:43 PM
unless it’s like, life or death, whenever I get a notification from one of my brothers with a chat screenshot between him and my mom I am dropping everything so fast. I’m sat, I’m taking notes, I’m locked in
I am this close to replacing my bedroom tv with one of those stupidly expensive frame TVs even though 90% of my watching hours are Fireplace Ambience youTube videos. But that’s exactly the point of those TVs, no?
October 8, 2025 at 5:58 PM
I am this close to replacing my bedroom tv with one of those stupidly expensive frame TVs even though 90% of my watching hours are Fireplace Ambience youTube videos. But that’s exactly the point of those TVs, no?
blue collar this, white collar that. if we really cared let’s rearrange society to have dual hybrid careers🗣️ How about I do my silly thought leadership corporate LARP MWF, and tile your bathroom Tues Thurs. Reduce health risks of both extremes by removing the extreme. Plus I want to learn to tile 🥲
September 29, 2025 at 7:00 PM
blue collar this, white collar that. if we really cared let’s rearrange society to have dual hybrid careers🗣️ How about I do my silly thought leadership corporate LARP MWF, and tile your bathroom Tues Thurs. Reduce health risks of both extremes by removing the extreme. Plus I want to learn to tile 🥲
shoving my queen bed into the smallest room of my house desperately seeking even a hair of relief from the most Professional Upstairs Neighbors I’ve ever had
September 28, 2025 at 3:02 PM
shoving my queen bed into the smallest room of my house desperately seeking even a hair of relief from the most Professional Upstairs Neighbors I’ve ever had
multiple men in my life over the past week: “I agreed with some things that CK said, but ABC thing was completely wrong of him to say”
me: “oh cool cool cool” IM IN DANGER
me: “oh cool cool cool” IM IN DANGER
September 22, 2025 at 2:53 PM
multiple men in my life over the past week: “I agreed with some things that CK said, but ABC thing was completely wrong of him to say”
me: “oh cool cool cool” IM IN DANGER
me: “oh cool cool cool” IM IN DANGER
yaaaaya a 25yo just told me that I do NOT look like I’m turning 34 at ALL. which is such a 25yo thing to think, but I’m still gonna cherish this remark for the entire next year
September 16, 2025 at 5:21 PM
yaaaaya a 25yo just told me that I do NOT look like I’m turning 34 at ALL. which is such a 25yo thing to think, but I’m still gonna cherish this remark for the entire next year
it’s below 65 degrees with a breeze I’m getting my personality back maybe life is worth living
September 3, 2025 at 5:35 PM
it’s below 65 degrees with a breeze I’m getting my personality back maybe life is worth living
one of the texts for my class this semester is a book I read like seven years ago when I wanted to go back to school but couldn’t afford it. I’ve never felt more academically superior in my life than right now
September 2, 2025 at 12:54 PM
one of the texts for my class this semester is a book I read like seven years ago when I wanted to go back to school but couldn’t afford it. I’ve never felt more academically superior in my life than right now
like I get that the old glide dental floss was straight up PFAS and I probably have rearranged DNA from using it for 15 years but the new glide floss shreds between my teeth like any other floss so what’s the POINT!!! 😩😤😩
September 1, 2025 at 2:34 AM
like I get that the old glide dental floss was straight up PFAS and I probably have rearranged DNA from using it for 15 years but the new glide floss shreds between my teeth like any other floss so what’s the POINT!!! 😩😤😩
trying not to shit my pants as Centerpoint tears up the road in front of my house 50 feet from my very centenarian and very settled foundation
August 29, 2025 at 4:53 PM
trying not to shit my pants as Centerpoint tears up the road in front of my house 50 feet from my very centenarian and very settled foundation
I just bought TWO blazers (up from zero blazers) for days I have Important Stuff At Work. For my corporate LARP costume closet. Even though Corporate Girly Leah is a literal paid actor she does pay all my bills. we buy her clothes that are dry clean only and we don’t whine about it
August 27, 2025 at 7:53 PM
I just bought TWO blazers (up from zero blazers) for days I have Important Stuff At Work. For my corporate LARP costume closet. Even though Corporate Girly Leah is a literal paid actor she does pay all my bills. we buy her clothes that are dry clean only and we don’t whine about it
just had a horrifying realization 10 years of corporate emails and slide making I’m pretty sure I’ve been writing weather instead of whether this entire fucking time
August 22, 2025 at 4:03 PM
just had a horrifying realization 10 years of corporate emails and slide making I’m pretty sure I’ve been writing weather instead of whether this entire fucking time
My brain to my body: maybe we don’t need to take this vitamin D supplement right now, it’s the middle of summer
My body to my brain: that’s fine, but here is the nighttime unshakably disturbing existential dread you ordered, enjoy!
My body to my brain: that’s fine, but here is the nighttime unshakably disturbing existential dread you ordered, enjoy!
August 20, 2025 at 5:10 PM
My brain to my body: maybe we don’t need to take this vitamin D supplement right now, it’s the middle of summer
My body to my brain: that’s fine, but here is the nighttime unshakably disturbing existential dread you ordered, enjoy!
My body to my brain: that’s fine, but here is the nighttime unshakably disturbing existential dread you ordered, enjoy!
I know it’s time to get my eyebrows waxed when I look in the mirror and get increasingly upset how much I look like my mom. 10 minute wax appointment oh THERE I AM thank GOD 😭
August 17, 2025 at 1:49 PM
I know it’s time to get my eyebrows waxed when I look in the mirror and get increasingly upset how much I look like my mom. 10 minute wax appointment oh THERE I AM thank GOD 😭
I like it here fine but every few months I find myself scrolling through my dormant tw***er profile like a grandmother flipping through her ancient high school year book remembering her lost love and how she never found it again
August 14, 2025 at 1:08 PM
I like it here fine but every few months I find myself scrolling through my dormant tw***er profile like a grandmother flipping through her ancient high school year book remembering her lost love and how she never found it again
The thing about all my weight fluctuations in the last two decades is every ten pounds I have to totally relearn how to play volleyball under that specific set of physics which is so silly
August 13, 2025 at 10:14 PM
The thing about all my weight fluctuations in the last two decades is every ten pounds I have to totally relearn how to play volleyball under that specific set of physics which is so silly
WHY DO PEOPLE WHO HIKE TREAT HIKING LIKE ITS A UNIVERSALLY LOVED ACTIVITY
IM SORRY NO
OUTSIDE CAN BE BREATHTAKING, ACHINGLY BEAUTIFUL, YES
SWEAT AND SUNBURN AND PUDDLES BUGS AND DUST TRUDGING FURTHER AND FURTHER FROM MEDICAL TREATMENT OH BTW NOW YOU HAVE TO RETRACE ALL YOUR STEPS BACK NO!!
IM SORRY NO
OUTSIDE CAN BE BREATHTAKING, ACHINGLY BEAUTIFUL, YES
SWEAT AND SUNBURN AND PUDDLES BUGS AND DUST TRUDGING FURTHER AND FURTHER FROM MEDICAL TREATMENT OH BTW NOW YOU HAVE TO RETRACE ALL YOUR STEPS BACK NO!!
August 9, 2025 at 1:12 AM
WHY DO PEOPLE WHO HIKE TREAT HIKING LIKE ITS A UNIVERSALLY LOVED ACTIVITY
IM SORRY NO
OUTSIDE CAN BE BREATHTAKING, ACHINGLY BEAUTIFUL, YES
SWEAT AND SUNBURN AND PUDDLES BUGS AND DUST TRUDGING FURTHER AND FURTHER FROM MEDICAL TREATMENT OH BTW NOW YOU HAVE TO RETRACE ALL YOUR STEPS BACK NO!!
IM SORRY NO
OUTSIDE CAN BE BREATHTAKING, ACHINGLY BEAUTIFUL, YES
SWEAT AND SUNBURN AND PUDDLES BUGS AND DUST TRUDGING FURTHER AND FURTHER FROM MEDICAL TREATMENT OH BTW NOW YOU HAVE TO RETRACE ALL YOUR STEPS BACK NO!!
hate when I wake up dreading a day and by noon get five minutes to breathe and confirm I was 100% justified in my dread ☠️
August 7, 2025 at 6:22 PM
hate when I wake up dreading a day and by noon get five minutes to breathe and confirm I was 100% justified in my dread ☠️
marketing is super funny I got this lip gloss sample called 💦FAT LIP DRIP OIL💦 and the formula and taste is identical to any drug store lip gloss in 2004 (an unmatched era). like, they could have just said that!
August 4, 2025 at 1:04 PM
marketing is super funny I got this lip gloss sample called 💦FAT LIP DRIP OIL💦 and the formula and taste is identical to any drug store lip gloss in 2004 (an unmatched era). like, they could have just said that!
going on 28 hours of babysitting my niece this weekend who I love dearly and we’ve been having a blast but my god I’m hiding in the corner googling
July 27, 2025 at 4:06 PM
going on 28 hours of babysitting my niece this weekend who I love dearly and we’ve been having a blast but my god I’m hiding in the corner googling