Leo likes to let people know how uncomfortably warm he is on a hot day by getting right up close and breathing on them, so they can experience this for themselves. Words are overrated human constructs.

#ScottishCulture is when your woolly jumper keeps catching on your sunburn 😩

In Scotland in January, you must make the most of a sunbathing spot for every second you can get one. Then you should refuse to go out for a walk, because it might make you confront the reality that the sun is not, in fact, warm. That was the radiator pipe under the floor. #LifeAccordingToLeo

I just read a book review where an exasperated reader declaimed “And then the heroine ‘drew up her knees and clasped a warm mug between her hands’, which no one has EVER done outside of instagram!” and I would like to introduce her to scotland, where it’s not about the aesthetics, it’s the draughts.

After sitting out, slightly bewildered on a balmy 12C December night with mulled wine and no gloves at the weekend, normal winter service has resumed ❄️ Get the Big Socks out, folks.

A while back I found the tiniest dehydrated baby lizard stuck in a cobweb (yes, yes, behind a chair in my house, what a slattern, etc). She was slow and wrinkled, and drank from a teaspoon for five minutes. A bask on a sunny windowsill later, she was properly zippy - off to live in the garden wall 🦎

Autumn’s well underway. Once again the geese are flying over my home every evening: the place they were in before has become less hospitable, and they have the instinct and sense to move to kinder climes. What’s good for the goose….