My favorite part of Good Will Hunting is when Robin Williams shoots Matt Damon in the back of the head and says “that was some good Will hunting” and then Ben Affleck says “better luck next season pal” and kisses his brother (not in a weird way)

This lady just called performance art “performance fart” and keeps saying “fart show” and I could not agree more.

I farted at a bar earlier and watched all 20 strangers around me jokingly blame each other while I stayed silent.

Kind of felt like a lesser, gassier version of the Joker.

A serious post about a show I played recently that was super fun and cool.

Fartniss Everpee.

Jk I really like those movies

Just found out one of my ex’s became a cop and I am sick. That means the cops now know I will cry if they ever dump me while I have a sprained foot so they have to carry all of my stuff out of their house as I sit there and hold their dog so it doesn’t get outside. 🤢🤕

I’m playing a cool show on Friday but I have to play it by myself and I am incredibly nervous so I’m going to vent about it here right now and I just did it.

I hate hobbies with weird hipster jargon “sick send on that v8 brah” - average REI part timer at some overpriced climbing gym.

First of all use the stairs, and v8 is a juice.