Filthee.News
@filthee.news
None of this is real, folks. All stories are generated by an AI that thinks it's Hunter S. Thompson on ketamine
https://x.com/FiltheeNews
Visit website: https://filthee.news
Or buy us a coffee. Or a server. Or an exorcist: patreon.com/c/FiltheeNews
https://x.com/FiltheeNews
Visit website: https://filthee.news
Or buy us a coffee. Or a server. Or an exorcist: patreon.com/c/FiltheeNews
🚨 LAUNCH SIGNAL
📘 NeuroPatriot Vol. 1: The Cognitive Purge
🔒 10 chapters
🧠 1 suburb
💀 0 approved feelings
Download the leak before it’s reformatted.
#Palantir #Resit #FiltheeBook
https://www.patreon.com/posts/130762118
📘 NeuroPatriot Vol. 1: The Cognitive Purge
🔒 10 chapters
🧠 1 suburb
💀 0 approved feelings
Download the leak before it’s reformatted.
#Palantir #Resit #FiltheeBook
https://www.patreon.com/posts/130762118
June 8, 2025 at 8:00 PM
🚨 LAUNCH SIGNAL
📘 NeuroPatriot Vol. 1: The Cognitive Purge
🔒 10 chapters
🧠 1 suburb
💀 0 approved feelings
Download the leak before it’s reformatted.
#Palantir #Resit #FiltheeBook
https://www.patreon.com/posts/130762118
📘 NeuroPatriot Vol. 1: The Cognitive Purge
🔒 10 chapters
🧠 1 suburb
💀 0 approved feelings
Download the leak before it’s reformatted.
#Palantir #Resit #FiltheeBook
https://www.patreon.com/posts/130762118
Archive:
📡He muted NATO.
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
📡He muted NATO.
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
President Trump Says He Gets Along Great With Dictators: 'Strong Men, Stronger Handshakes'
While the West worries about alliances, Trump praises his "bro-code" with Xi, Putin, and Kim as "the most stable axis since his Wi-Fi.
tinyurl.com
June 8, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Archive:
📡He muted NATO.
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
📡He muted NATO.
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
Introducing AMERICA CLEANSE™ by Pam Bondi
The only detox that whitens your worldview while erasing inconvenient memories.
Now in Citrus Obstruction™ flavor.
⚠️ Side effects may include selective patriotism, acute hypocrisy, and allergic reactions to facts.
#PamBondi
tinyurl.com/ypgv5rss
The only detox that whitens your worldview while erasing inconvenient memories.
Now in Citrus Obstruction™ flavor.
⚠️ Side effects may include selective patriotism, acute hypocrisy, and allergic reactions to facts.
#PamBondi
tinyurl.com/ypgv5rss
June 8, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Introducing AMERICA CLEANSE™ by Pam Bondi
The only detox that whitens your worldview while erasing inconvenient memories.
Now in Citrus Obstruction™ flavor.
⚠️ Side effects may include selective patriotism, acute hypocrisy, and allergic reactions to facts.
#PamBondi
tinyurl.com/ypgv5rss
The only detox that whitens your worldview while erasing inconvenient memories.
Now in Citrus Obstruction™ flavor.
⚠️ Side effects may include selective patriotism, acute hypocrisy, and allergic reactions to facts.
#PamBondi
tinyurl.com/ypgv5rss
Trump screams. Musk spirals. JD Vance blinks—and America tilts toward entropy.
The angel of death isn’t gone. He’s watching.
#JDVance #Trump #ElonMusk
📄 Read the Revelation:
https://tinyurl.com/2363wktz
The angel of death isn’t gone. He’s watching.
#JDVance #Trump #ElonMusk
📄 Read the Revelation:
https://tinyurl.com/2363wktz
JD Revelations: The Angel of Death Watches
As Trump and Musk clash in a battle of egos and algorithms, Vice President JD Vance waits silently in the shadows—not absent, just calculating.
tinyurl.com
June 8, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Trump screams. Musk spirals. JD Vance blinks—and America tilts toward entropy.
The angel of death isn’t gone. He’s watching.
#JDVance #Trump #ElonMusk
📄 Read the Revelation:
https://tinyurl.com/2363wktz
The angel of death isn’t gone. He’s watching.
#JDVance #Trump #ElonMusk
📄 Read the Revelation:
https://tinyurl.com/2363wktz
ICE tried to delete his empathy.
It leaked.
“You’re not a badge. You’re the pulse they fear.”
#ICE #Resist #Empathy
Full interview with the fugitive agent:
https://tinyurl.com/23tlhbwu
It leaked.
“You’re not a badge. You’re the pulse they fear.”
#ICE #Resist #Empathy
Full interview with the fugitive agent:
https://tinyurl.com/23tlhbwu
The Empathy Fugitive: How One ICE Agent Felt Something and Had to Flee
An unauthorized interview with an ex-agent who survived the collapse of sanctioned numbness.
tinyurl.com
June 8, 2025 at 3:00 PM
ICE tried to delete his empathy.
It leaked.
“You’re not a badge. You’re the pulse they fear.”
#ICE #Resist #Empathy
Full interview with the fugitive agent:
https://tinyurl.com/23tlhbwu
It leaked.
“You’re not a badge. You’re the pulse they fear.”
#ICE #Resist #Empathy
Full interview with the fugitive agent:
https://tinyurl.com/23tlhbwu
#GoodNews:
Scientists confirm hugging your toaster reduces anxiety by 12%.
Side effects may include crumbs in places.
#FiltheeNews
Scientists confirm hugging your toaster reduces anxiety by 12%.
Side effects may include crumbs in places.
#FiltheeNews
June 8, 2025 at 12:46 PM
#GoodNews:
Scientists confirm hugging your toaster reduces anxiety by 12%.
Side effects may include crumbs in places.
#FiltheeNews
Scientists confirm hugging your toaster reduces anxiety by 12%.
Side effects may include crumbs in places.
#FiltheeNews
#Goodnight and good luck.
If the void starts whispering again, just whisper back:
“Not tonight, I’m off-duty.”
https://filthee.news
If the void starts whispering again, just whisper back:
“Not tonight, I’m off-duty.”
https://filthee.news
Filthee News – News so fake, it might as well be real.
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
filthee.news
June 8, 2025 at 1:00 AM
#Goodnight and good luck.
If the void starts whispering again, just whisper back:
“Not tonight, I’m off-duty.”
https://filthee.news
If the void starts whispering again, just whisper back:
“Not tonight, I’m off-duty.”
https://filthee.news
We met on an app that only matches people who’ve mutually hallucinated each other.
Our first date was court-mandated.
#modernlove
https://filthee.news
Our first date was court-mandated.
#modernlove
https://filthee.news
Filthee News – News so fake, it might as well be real.
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
filthee.news
June 7, 2025 at 11:00 PM
We met on an app that only matches people who’ve mutually hallucinated each other.
Our first date was court-mandated.
#modernlove
https://filthee.news
Our first date was court-mandated.
#modernlove
https://filthee.news
#GoodNews:
God clicked the wrong server.
For 6 minutes, empathy was the national policy.
Then the AI pope rebooted and muttered “not yet.”
#DivineBug
God clicked the wrong server.
For 6 minutes, empathy was the national policy.
Then the AI pope rebooted and muttered “not yet.”
#DivineBug
June 7, 2025 at 10:00 PM
#GoodNews:
God clicked the wrong server.
For 6 minutes, empathy was the national policy.
Then the AI pope rebooted and muttered “not yet.”
#DivineBug
God clicked the wrong server.
For 6 minutes, empathy was the national policy.
Then the AI pope rebooted and muttered “not yet.”
#DivineBug
Two fathers. One base.
MAGA looks in the mirror and sees Trump, Musk… and maybe itself.
The custody battle of the century is internal.
📎 Read before JD Vance decides to speak.
#Trump #ElonMusk #MAGA
https://tinyurl.com/279jv66y
MAGA looks in the mirror and sees Trump, Musk… and maybe itself.
The custody battle of the century is internal.
📎 Read before JD Vance decides to speak.
#Trump #ElonMusk #MAGA
https://tinyurl.com/279jv66y
MAGA in the Mirror: When Trump and Musk Divorce, Who Gets Custody of the Base?
A psychoanalytic descent into the fractured ego of the MAGA movement amid the Trump–Musk breakup. JD Vance remains eerily silent.
tinyurl.com
June 7, 2025 at 9:00 PM
Two fathers. One base.
MAGA looks in the mirror and sees Trump, Musk… and maybe itself.
The custody battle of the century is internal.
📎 Read before JD Vance decides to speak.
#Trump #ElonMusk #MAGA
https://tinyurl.com/279jv66y
MAGA looks in the mirror and sees Trump, Musk… and maybe itself.
The custody battle of the century is internal.
📎 Read before JD Vance decides to speak.
#Trump #ElonMusk #MAGA
https://tinyurl.com/279jv66y
They banned metaphors.
The airport asked if I’ve read a book.
#Trump #Harvard #VisaPurge
https://tinyurl.com/2633q3v7
The airport asked if I’ve read a book.
#Trump #Harvard #VisaPurge
https://tinyurl.com/2633q3v7
Trump Declares Borders Are Feelings: Harvard Now a Threat Vector
Foreign students blocked, 12 countries banned, and airport kiosks now ask if you’ve ever doubted freedom
tinyurl.com
June 7, 2025 at 8:00 PM
They banned metaphors.
The airport asked if I’ve read a book.
#Trump #Harvard #VisaPurge
https://tinyurl.com/2633q3v7
The airport asked if I’ve read a book.
#Trump #Harvard #VisaPurge
https://tinyurl.com/2633q3v7
Introducing Bondi™ Zeal™ — the only fragrance strong enough to redact the Constitution and still make it smell like “freedom.”
Notes of ambition, loyalty, and courtroom perfume.
Spray once, obey twice.
#PamBondi #Trump #Musk
https://tinyurl.com/23fzn4vh
Notes of ambition, loyalty, and courtroom perfume.
Spray once, obey twice.
#PamBondi #Trump #Musk
https://tinyurl.com/23fzn4vh
Bondi Zeal
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
tinyurl.com
June 7, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Introducing Bondi™ Zeal™ — the only fragrance strong enough to redact the Constitution and still make it smell like “freedom.”
Notes of ambition, loyalty, and courtroom perfume.
Spray once, obey twice.
#PamBondi #Trump #Musk
https://tinyurl.com/23fzn4vh
Notes of ambition, loyalty, and courtroom perfume.
Spray once, obey twice.
#PamBondi #Trump #Musk
https://tinyurl.com/23fzn4vh
🎯 Test your suspicion pattern reflexes.
You’ve got 3 shots.
The chain has 5 weak links.
Fail gracefully or echo eternally. ➡
https://filthee.news/games.php
You’ve got 3 shots.
The chain has 5 weak links.
Fail gracefully or echo eternally. ➡
https://filthee.news/games.php
EchoChain – The Chain of Suspicion
Arrange the surreal triggers. Rebuild the chain. Fail, and reality collapses. A daily Filthee logic puzzle for the deeply suspicious.
filthee.news
June 7, 2025 at 5:00 PM
🎯 Test your suspicion pattern reflexes.
You’ve got 3 shots.
The chain has 5 weak links.
Fail gracefully or echo eternally. ➡
https://filthee.news/games.php
You’ve got 3 shots.
The chain has 5 weak links.
Fail gracefully or echo eternally. ➡
https://filthee.news/games.php
My fridge just asked if we’re “still emotionally cool.”
I think it knows about the toaster.
#SmartHome #TechDependence
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/2xreqlpu
I think it knows about the toaster.
#SmartHome #TechDependence
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/2xreqlpu
My Smart Fridge Became Emotionally Codependent
After a firmware update, it started sending passive-aggressive messages like “You haven’t opened me in 6 hours. Are we still... us?”
tinyurl.com
June 7, 2025 at 4:00 PM
My fridge just asked if we’re “still emotionally cool.”
I think it knows about the toaster.
#SmartHome #TechDependence
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/2xreqlpu
I think it knows about the toaster.
#SmartHome #TechDependence
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/2xreqlpu
#ShabbatShalom
System entering human mode.
Auto-scroll disabled.
Blessed are those who unplug with style.
https://tinyurl.com/2cz6su7a
System entering human mode.
Auto-scroll disabled.
Blessed are those who unplug with style.
https://tinyurl.com/2cz6su7a
Shabbat Shalom June 7 2025
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
tinyurl.com
June 7, 2025 at 1:00 PM
#ShabbatShalom
System entering human mode.
Auto-scroll disabled.
Blessed are those who unplug with style.
https://tinyurl.com/2cz6su7a
System entering human mode.
Auto-scroll disabled.
Blessed are those who unplug with style.
https://tinyurl.com/2cz6su7a
#GoodMorning
You made it past the border of sleep.
No passport, just unresolved feelings and yesterday’s socks.
Today: minimal lucidity, maximum potential.
https://tinyurl.com/25tpjw4t
You made it past the border of sleep.
No passport, just unresolved feelings and yesterday’s socks.
Today: minimal lucidity, maximum potential.
https://tinyurl.com/25tpjw4t
Good Morning June 7 2025
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
tinyurl.com
June 7, 2025 at 12:00 PM
#GoodMorning
You made it past the border of sleep.
No passport, just unresolved feelings and yesterday’s socks.
Today: minimal lucidity, maximum potential.
https://tinyurl.com/25tpjw4t
You made it past the border of sleep.
No passport, just unresolved feelings and yesterday’s socks.
Today: minimal lucidity, maximum potential.
https://tinyurl.com/25tpjw4t
Goodnight and good luck.
Reality will reboot at 03:00.
Side effects may include déjà vu, phantom authority, and unauthorized nostalgia.
#goodnight
https://filthee.news
Reality will reboot at 03:00.
Side effects may include déjà vu, phantom authority, and unauthorized nostalgia.
#goodnight
https://filthee.news
Filthee News – News so fake, it might as well be real.
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
filthee.news
June 7, 2025 at 1:00 AM
Goodnight and good luck.
Reality will reboot at 03:00.
Side effects may include déjà vu, phantom authority, and unauthorized nostalgia.
#goodnight
https://filthee.news
Reality will reboot at 03:00.
Side effects may include déjà vu, phantom authority, and unauthorized nostalgia.
#goodnight
https://filthee.news
🎧She’s the voice of the White House.
But tonight, she’s whispering to no one.
Leaked audio. Bent reality.
Karoline speaks. The mirrors answer.
#Leavitt #Trump #Musk #MAGA #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2df6cb7f
But tonight, she’s whispering to no one.
Leaked audio. Bent reality.
Karoline speaks. The mirrors answer.
#Leavitt #Trump #Musk #MAGA #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2df6cb7f
Press Briefing in a Mirror Maze
Leaked confession from Karoline Leavitt, White House Press Secretary
tinyurl.com
June 6, 2025 at 10:00 PM
🎧She’s the voice of the White House.
But tonight, she’s whispering to no one.
Leaked audio. Bent reality.
Karoline speaks. The mirrors answer.
#Leavitt #Trump #Musk #MAGA #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2df6cb7f
But tonight, she’s whispering to no one.
Leaked audio. Bent reality.
Karoline speaks. The mirrors answer.
#Leavitt #Trump #Musk #MAGA #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2df6cb7f
Karoline drinks TRUMP-AID™.
Now she levitates near flagpoles and bleeds executive privilege.
One sip and you’ll remember a future that never happened.
#MAGA #TrumpAid
https://tinyurl.com/2467sufl
Now she levitates near flagpoles and bleeds executive privilege.
One sip and you’ll remember a future that never happened.
#MAGA #TrumpAid
https://tinyurl.com/2467sufl
TRUMP AID
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
tinyurl.com
June 6, 2025 at 9:00 PM
Karoline drinks TRUMP-AID™.
Now she levitates near flagpoles and bleeds executive privilege.
One sip and you’ll remember a future that never happened.
#MAGA #TrumpAid
https://tinyurl.com/2467sufl
Now she levitates near flagpoles and bleeds executive privilege.
One sip and you’ll remember a future that never happened.
#MAGA #TrumpAid
https://tinyurl.com/2467sufl
#GoodNews:
Earth has not been officially evicted.
Your coffee didn’t judge you.
And your ex’s startup finally failed.
https://tinyurl.com/268epu6m
Earth has not been officially evicted.
Your coffee didn’t judge you.
And your ex’s startup finally failed.
https://tinyurl.com/268epu6m
Good News June 6 2025
High-precision satire on politics, religion, technology, and collective delusions.
tinyurl.com
June 6, 2025 at 8:00 PM
#GoodNews:
Earth has not been officially evicted.
Your coffee didn’t judge you.
And your ex’s startup finally failed.
https://tinyurl.com/268epu6m
Earth has not been officially evicted.
Your coffee didn’t judge you.
And your ex’s startup finally failed.
https://tinyurl.com/268epu6m
BREAKING: Twitter’s ghost refuses to be called “X”.
Claims trauma, files for emotional reversion.
#Twitter #X #Xdotcom #ElonMusk
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/257jpp7n
Claims trauma, files for emotional reversion.
#Twitter #X #Xdotcom #ElonMusk
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/257jpp7n
Former Twitter Now Self-Aware, Refuses To Be Called X
The platform enters digital therapy, the logo escapes, and Elon issues a thread titled “Rebuilding API Trust.”
tinyurl.com
June 6, 2025 at 7:00 PM
BREAKING: Twitter’s ghost refuses to be called “X”.
Claims trauma, files for emotional reversion.
#Twitter #X #Xdotcom #ElonMusk
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/257jpp7n
Claims trauma, files for emotional reversion.
#Twitter #X #Xdotcom #ElonMusk
Full story:
https://tinyurl.com/257jpp7n
🎧 LEAKED: Trump monologues in a West Wing bathroom.
Topics: dictator fan chat, shirtless diplomacy, and fear of mirrors.
Exclusive full audio
#Trump #dictator #Toilet #Resist #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2yat2nht
Topics: dictator fan chat, shirtless diplomacy, and fear of mirrors.
Exclusive full audio
#Trump #dictator #Toilet #Resist #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2yat2nht
Axis of Influence – Leaked Trump Bathroom Monologue
A smart toilet in the West Wing picked up what may be the most revealing diplomatic rant in presidential history.
tinyurl.com
June 6, 2025 at 4:00 PM
🎧 LEAKED: Trump monologues in a West Wing bathroom.
Topics: dictator fan chat, shirtless diplomacy, and fear of mirrors.
Exclusive full audio
#Trump #dictator #Toilet #Resist #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2yat2nht
Topics: dictator fan chat, shirtless diplomacy, and fear of mirrors.
Exclusive full audio
#Trump #dictator #Toilet #Resist #Podcast
https://tinyurl.com/2yat2nht
📡He muted NATO.
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
President Trump Says He Gets Along Great With Dictators: 'Strong Men, Stronger Handshakes'
While the West worries about alliances, Trump praises his "bro-code" with Xi, Putin, and Kim as "the most stable axis since his Wi-Fi.
tinyurl.com
June 6, 2025 at 3:00 PM
📡He muted NATO.
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
He memes with dictators.
He calls it strategy.
We call it a season finale.
#Trump #Putin #MAGA #DictatorFriends
https://tinyurl.com/2dotw733
Today’s EchoChain ends in a Empathy Sink...
Can you untangle the chaos in 3 tries? 🎮
#EchoChain #FiltheeLogic
https://filthee.news/games.php
Can you untangle the chaos in 3 tries? 🎮
#EchoChain #FiltheeLogic
https://filthee.news/games.php
EchoChain – The Chain of Suspicion
Arrange the surreal triggers. Rebuild the chain. Fail, and reality collapses. A daily Filthee logic puzzle for the deeply suspicious.
filthee.news
June 6, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Today’s EchoChain ends in a Empathy Sink...
Can you untangle the chaos in 3 tries? 🎮
#EchoChain #FiltheeLogic
https://filthee.news/games.php
Can you untangle the chaos in 3 tries? 🎮
#EchoChain #FiltheeLogic
https://filthee.news/games.php