Errai
@errai.bsky.social
from me the dragon / bf @sumiaou.bsky.social / errai.tf
(twitch streamer on deathbed) my only tier list of regrets is...
February 1, 2026 at 3:16 PM
(twitch streamer on deathbed) my only tier list of regrets is...
(training my kung fu disciple but he's visibly kicking my ass) Too slow. Focus (straight jab in the face) Predictable (getting suplexed) Sloppy
February 1, 2026 at 5:58 AM
(training my kung fu disciple but he's visibly kicking my ass) Too slow. Focus (straight jab in the face) Predictable (getting suplexed) Sloppy
Bounce light / Fire escape
February 1, 2026 at 12:58 AM
Bounce light / Fire escape
Tennis player that grunts whenever he sends a work email
February 1, 2026 at 12:24 AM
Tennis player that grunts whenever he sends a work email
(calling my lawyer) is horny jail real
January 31, 2026 at 4:10 AM
(calling my lawyer) is horny jail real
Reposted by Errai
Emergency exits are a comforting sign that you're nearing the end of an emergency
June 26, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Emergency exits are a comforting sign that you're nearing the end of an emergency
(excitedly showing Transformers to bartender) and this one actually turns into a dinosaur
Bartender: (with a dazzling smile) form meets function!
Guy sitting nearby: (slamming whiskey glass down) those are evil Autobots and I'm sick of people praising them
Bartender: (with a dazzling smile) form meets function!
Guy sitting nearby: (slamming whiskey glass down) those are evil Autobots and I'm sick of people praising them
January 31, 2026 at 12:08 AM
(excitedly showing Transformers to bartender) and this one actually turns into a dinosaur
Bartender: (with a dazzling smile) form meets function!
Guy sitting nearby: (slamming whiskey glass down) those are evil Autobots and I'm sick of people praising them
Bartender: (with a dazzling smile) form meets function!
Guy sitting nearby: (slamming whiskey glass down) those are evil Autobots and I'm sick of people praising them
(before the proverb was invented) I wish I knew what to do with all these goddamn lemons
January 30, 2026 at 6:23 PM
(before the proverb was invented) I wish I knew what to do with all these goddamn lemons
(writing in my diary) today was inconsequential to my mission
January 30, 2026 at 6:28 AM
(writing in my diary) today was inconsequential to my mission
Mosquito 1: I still can't shake the feeling that maybe we're inherently evil
Mosquito 2: (pausing blood sucking) Listen pal, we've been over this. There's no such thing as absolute sin or virtue. It's all relative
Mosquito 2: (pausing blood sucking) Listen pal, we've been over this. There's no such thing as absolute sin or virtue. It's all relative
January 29, 2026 at 8:27 PM
Mosquito 1: I still can't shake the feeling that maybe we're inherently evil
Mosquito 2: (pausing blood sucking) Listen pal, we've been over this. There's no such thing as absolute sin or virtue. It's all relative
Mosquito 2: (pausing blood sucking) Listen pal, we've been over this. There's no such thing as absolute sin or virtue. It's all relative
(catching up with my psychotic friend over dinner) So, any new theories lately
January 29, 2026 at 2:58 AM
(catching up with my psychotic friend over dinner) So, any new theories lately
(imparting the 10 commandments through a time machine) thou shalt n- hold on.. (distant) yeah.. no pepperoni for me, thanks. Ok I'm back
Moses: What is "pepperoni", God?
Me: Don't worry about it
Moses: May I try "pepperoni?"
Me: Thou shalt not covet! Absolutely no coveting!!
Moses: What is "pepperoni", God?
Me: Don't worry about it
Moses: May I try "pepperoni?"
Me: Thou shalt not covet! Absolutely no coveting!!
January 28, 2026 at 10:57 PM
(imparting the 10 commandments through a time machine) thou shalt n- hold on.. (distant) yeah.. no pepperoni for me, thanks. Ok I'm back
Moses: What is "pepperoni", God?
Me: Don't worry about it
Moses: May I try "pepperoni?"
Me: Thou shalt not covet! Absolutely no coveting!!
Moses: What is "pepperoni", God?
Me: Don't worry about it
Moses: May I try "pepperoni?"
Me: Thou shalt not covet! Absolutely no coveting!!
(letting doordasher out of the labyrinth) You are free now
Him: I have nothing to live for out there
Him: I have nothing to live for out there
January 28, 2026 at 6:44 PM
(letting doordasher out of the labyrinth) You are free now
Him: I have nothing to live for out there
Him: I have nothing to live for out there
The Mindful Hater: oh, I hate that (closing eyes, deep breath) I hate that 😌
January 28, 2026 at 5:36 AM
The Mindful Hater: oh, I hate that (closing eyes, deep breath) I hate that 😌
(writing steampunk novel) "Damn it. I'm out of steam-bullets," said Clockwork Boy as he tossed his hypersonic plasma rifle aside
January 28, 2026 at 12:59 AM
(writing steampunk novel) "Damn it. I'm out of steam-bullets," said Clockwork Boy as he tossed his hypersonic plasma rifle aside
(after catching a big fish in a small pond) This isn't the flex you think it is
January 27, 2026 at 10:44 PM
(after catching a big fish in a small pond) This isn't the flex you think it is
[Intel acquired] The restroom code is 4567
[Intel acquired] Today's special is Greek-style baked tilapia
[Intel acquired] The waiter can be manipulated into destroying his own boss
[Intel acquired] Today's special is Greek-style baked tilapia
[Intel acquired] The waiter can be manipulated into destroying his own boss
January 27, 2026 at 5:46 AM
[Intel acquired] The restroom code is 4567
[Intel acquired] Today's special is Greek-style baked tilapia
[Intel acquired] The waiter can be manipulated into destroying his own boss
[Intel acquired] Today's special is Greek-style baked tilapia
[Intel acquired] The waiter can be manipulated into destroying his own boss
Instrumental bands are so sad. I'll sing with you if nobody else wants to
January 27, 2026 at 4:42 AM
Instrumental bands are so sad. I'll sing with you if nobody else wants to
(Mom at the park) okay, then I'm leaving without you! byeee!
Me, 34 years old: (sitting on a swing) Farewell, mother
Me, 34 years old: (sitting on a swing) Farewell, mother
January 27, 2026 at 3:44 AM
(Mom at the park) okay, then I'm leaving without you! byeee!
Me, 34 years old: (sitting on a swing) Farewell, mother
Me, 34 years old: (sitting on a swing) Farewell, mother
Absorbing my weaker mutuals
January 27, 2026 at 3:44 AM
Absorbing my weaker mutuals