@ericleifdavin.bsky.social
Historian, writer, & provocateur. Ph.D. in American history, with an interest in labor, politics, and cultural history.
HE DIDN'T CARE
The Emperor wanted Greenland,
Even though it was a friend.
He said he didn't care,
And all friends should beware,
He also wants their land.
The Emperor wanted Greenland,
Even though it was a friend.
He said he didn't care,
And all friends should beware,
He also wants their land.
January 20, 2026 at 9:15 AM
HE DIDN'T CARE
The Emperor wanted Greenland,
Even though it was a friend.
He said he didn't care,
And all friends should beware,
He also wants their land.
The Emperor wanted Greenland,
Even though it was a friend.
He said he didn't care,
And all friends should beware,
He also wants their land.
NO REASON
The Emperor's actions have no reason.
They fluctuate with the season.
Depending on how he got out of bed,
Or on the greasy food he fed,
Will be the occasion of some invasion.
The Emperor's actions have no reason.
They fluctuate with the season.
Depending on how he got out of bed,
Or on the greasy food he fed,
Will be the occasion of some invasion.
January 19, 2026 at 6:55 PM
NO REASON
The Emperor's actions have no reason.
They fluctuate with the season.
Depending on how he got out of bed,
Or on the greasy food he fed,
Will be the occasion of some invasion.
The Emperor's actions have no reason.
They fluctuate with the season.
Depending on how he got out of bed,
Or on the greasy food he fed,
Will be the occasion of some invasion.
COMPLETELY MAD
The Emperor's speech is incoherent.
His actions are all aberrant.
His senility is bad,
It's clear he's completely mad,
His dementia is now apparent.
The Emperor's speech is incoherent.
His actions are all aberrant.
His senility is bad,
It's clear he's completely mad,
His dementia is now apparent.
January 18, 2026 at 5:10 PM
COMPLETELY MAD
The Emperor's speech is incoherent.
His actions are all aberrant.
His senility is bad,
It's clear he's completely mad,
His dementia is now apparent.
The Emperor's speech is incoherent.
His actions are all aberrant.
His senility is bad,
It's clear he's completely mad,
His dementia is now apparent.
HER DIADEM
The Emperor finally got his peace prize.
The winner had to apologize
For being more deserving than him.
Then she offered up her diadem,
Which he soon tried on for size.
The Emperor finally got his peace prize.
The winner had to apologize
For being more deserving than him.
Then she offered up her diadem,
Which he soon tried on for size.
January 17, 2026 at 6:32 PM
HER DIADEM
The Emperor finally got his peace prize.
The winner had to apologize
For being more deserving than him.
Then she offered up her diadem,
Which he soon tried on for size.
The Emperor finally got his peace prize.
The winner had to apologize
For being more deserving than him.
Then she offered up her diadem,
Which he soon tried on for size.
HE IS THE LAW
The Emperor says he's not a scofflaw
Because he is the law.
He takes what he wants,
And then he just taunts
Anyone against him as an outlaw.
The Emperor says he's not a scofflaw
Because he is the law.
He takes what he wants,
And then he just taunts
Anyone against him as an outlaw.
January 16, 2026 at 4:47 PM
HE IS THE LAW
The Emperor says he's not a scofflaw
Because he is the law.
He takes what he wants,
And then he just taunts
Anyone against him as an outlaw.
The Emperor says he's not a scofflaw
Because he is the law.
He takes what he wants,
And then he just taunts
Anyone against him as an outlaw.
A BIG BLUFF
The Emperor likes to look rough.
He thinks it makes him seem tough.
But when he sends others to fight,
He is nowhere in sight.
His manhood is just a big bluff.
The Emperor likes to look rough.
He thinks it makes him seem tough.
But when he sends others to fight,
He is nowhere in sight.
His manhood is just a big bluff.
January 15, 2026 at 5:46 PM
A BIG BLUFF
The Emperor likes to look rough.
He thinks it makes him seem tough.
But when he sends others to fight,
He is nowhere in sight.
His manhood is just a big bluff.
The Emperor likes to look rough.
He thinks it makes him seem tough.
But when he sends others to fight,
He is nowhere in sight.
His manhood is just a big bluff.
PERSEVERE
The Emperor seeks to rule thru fear.
He hopes to drive us to a nadir.
But if we don't give in,
The people can win.
Hold on and persevere.
The Emperor seeks to rule thru fear.
He hopes to drive us to a nadir.
But if we don't give in,
The people can win.
Hold on and persevere.
January 14, 2026 at 4:06 PM
PERSEVERE
The Emperor seeks to rule thru fear.
He hopes to drive us to a nadir.
But if we don't give in,
The people can win.
Hold on and persevere.
The Emperor seeks to rule thru fear.
He hopes to drive us to a nadir.
But if we don't give in,
The people can win.
Hold on and persevere.
A ZERO
The Emperor did not think it odd
That he proclaimed himself a god.
If it was good enough for Nero,
It's good enough for any zero,
No matter how much a complete fraud.
The Emperor did not think it odd
That he proclaimed himself a god.
If it was good enough for Nero,
It's good enough for any zero,
No matter how much a complete fraud.
January 13, 2026 at 5:58 PM
A ZERO
The Emperor did not think it odd
That he proclaimed himself a god.
If it was good enough for Nero,
It's good enough for any zero,
No matter how much a complete fraud.
The Emperor did not think it odd
That he proclaimed himself a god.
If it was good enough for Nero,
It's good enough for any zero,
No matter how much a complete fraud.
QUICK TO OBEY
The Emperor's gnomes are quick to obey,
Eager to find new ways to slay.
There is one named Bondi,
And another named Kristi,
Both seeking to expand his odious sway.
The Emperor's gnomes are quick to obey,
Eager to find new ways to slay.
There is one named Bondi,
And another named Kristi,
Both seeking to expand his odious sway.
January 12, 2026 at 5:51 PM
QUICK TO OBEY
The Emperor's gnomes are quick to obey,
Eager to find new ways to slay.
There is one named Bondi,
And another named Kristi,
Both seeking to expand his odious sway.
The Emperor's gnomes are quick to obey,
Eager to find new ways to slay.
There is one named Bondi,
And another named Kristi,
Both seeking to expand his odious sway.
DON'T BELIEVE YOUR EYES
The Emperor says don't believe your eyes.
Close your ears to all their cries.
There is no other way,
It happened just the way I say.
Believe only all my lies.
The Emperor says don't believe your eyes.
Close your ears to all their cries.
There is no other way,
It happened just the way I say.
Believe only all my lies.
January 11, 2026 at 8:05 PM
DON'T BELIEVE YOUR EYES
The Emperor says don't believe your eyes.
Close your ears to all their cries.
There is no other way,
It happened just the way I say.
Believe only all my lies.
The Emperor says don't believe your eyes.
Close your ears to all their cries.
There is no other way,
It happened just the way I say.
Believe only all my lies.
THEY'RE CALLED ICE
The Emperor hates kisses and hugs.
He likes only his goons and his thugs.
They close their hearts with a vise,
That's why they're called ICE,
And if you smile, they pump you with slugs.
The Emperor hates kisses and hugs.
He likes only his goons and his thugs.
They close their hearts with a vise,
That's why they're called ICE,
And if you smile, they pump you with slugs.
January 10, 2026 at 11:59 AM
THEY'RE CALLED ICE
The Emperor hates kisses and hugs.
He likes only his goons and his thugs.
They close their hearts with a vise,
That's why they're called ICE,
And if you smile, they pump you with slugs.
The Emperor hates kisses and hugs.
He likes only his goons and his thugs.
They close their hearts with a vise,
That's why they're called ICE,
And if you smile, they pump you with slugs.
HIS OWN MORALITY
Only the Emperor's own morality,
He said, can stop his ferocity.
But he's a total fool
Who never learned the Golden Rule,
And he's completely lacking empathy.
Only the Emperor's own morality,
He said, can stop his ferocity.
But he's a total fool
Who never learned the Golden Rule,
And he's completely lacking empathy.
January 9, 2026 at 8:56 PM
HIS OWN MORALITY
Only the Emperor's own morality,
He said, can stop his ferocity.
But he's a total fool
Who never learned the Golden Rule,
And he's completely lacking empathy.
Only the Emperor's own morality,
He said, can stop his ferocity.
But he's a total fool
Who never learned the Golden Rule,
And he's completely lacking empathy.
A NAZI CUR
The Emperor unleashed his terror
Under the command of a pretty poseur,
A vicious little gnome
By the name of Kristi Noem,
Who all agreed was just a Nazi cur.
The Emperor unleashed his terror
Under the command of a pretty poseur,
A vicious little gnome
By the name of Kristi Noem,
Who all agreed was just a Nazi cur.
January 8, 2026 at 11:18 AM
A NAZI CUR
The Emperor unleashed his terror
Under the command of a pretty poseur,
A vicious little gnome
By the name of Kristi Noem,
Who all agreed was just a Nazi cur.
The Emperor unleashed his terror
Under the command of a pretty poseur,
A vicious little gnome
By the name of Kristi Noem,
Who all agreed was just a Nazi cur.
NO LOYAL OPPOSITION
The Emperor says there's no loyal opposition.
Only traitors oppose his position.
Ban free speech,
Jail those who teach,
It's all his decision.
The Emperor says there's no loyal opposition.
Only traitors oppose his position.
Ban free speech,
Jail those who teach,
It's all his decision.
January 7, 2026 at 12:18 PM
NO LOYAL OPPOSITION
The Emperor says there's no loyal opposition.
Only traitors oppose his position.
Ban free speech,
Jail those who teach,
It's all his decision.
The Emperor says there's no loyal opposition.
Only traitors oppose his position.
Ban free speech,
Jail those who teach,
It's all his decision.
HE WANTS PEACE
The Emperor says he wants peace,
Here a piece and there a piece.
He also wants a peace prize
To try on for size,
Right after he bombs Greece.
The Emperor says he wants peace,
Here a piece and there a piece.
He also wants a peace prize
To try on for size,
Right after he bombs Greece.
January 6, 2026 at 11:12 AM
HE WANTS PEACE
The Emperor says he wants peace,
Here a piece and there a piece.
He also wants a peace prize
To try on for size,
Right after he bombs Greece.
The Emperor says he wants peace,
Here a piece and there a piece.
He also wants a peace prize
To try on for size,
Right after he bombs Greece.
ALL ABOUT OIL
The Emperor says it's all about oil,
And now we will despoil
All that nation's reserves.
It's what it deserves
For being in such turmoil.
The Emperor says it's all about oil,
And now we will despoil
All that nation's reserves.
It's what it deserves
For being in such turmoil.
January 5, 2026 at 12:17 PM
ALL ABOUT OIL
The Emperor says it's all about oil,
And now we will despoil
All that nation's reserves.
It's what it deserves
For being in such turmoil.
The Emperor says it's all about oil,
And now we will despoil
All that nation's reserves.
It's what it deserves
For being in such turmoil.
BECAUSE HE CAN
The Emperor does it because he can.
No one knows if he even has a plan.
He may break the law
Like some kind of outlaw,
But he thinks it makes him a man.
The Emperor does it because he can.
No one knows if he even has a plan.
He may break the law
Like some kind of outlaw,
But he thinks it makes him a man.
January 4, 2026 at 12:33 PM
BECAUSE HE CAN
The Emperor does it because he can.
No one knows if he even has a plan.
He may break the law
Like some kind of outlaw,
But he thinks it makes him a man.
The Emperor does it because he can.
No one knows if he even has a plan.
He may break the law
Like some kind of outlaw,
But he thinks it makes him a man.
CLEARLY INSANE
The Emperor's docs keep testing his brain.
They fear it's going down the drain.
He boasts that he knows what to call
Each shown animal,
Even though he's clearly insane.
The Emperor's docs keep testing his brain.
They fear it's going down the drain.
He boasts that he knows what to call
Each shown animal,
Even though he's clearly insane.
January 3, 2026 at 10:03 AM
CLEARLY INSANE
The Emperor's docs keep testing his brain.
They fear it's going down the drain.
He boasts that he knows what to call
Each shown animal,
Even though he's clearly insane.
The Emperor's docs keep testing his brain.
They fear it's going down the drain.
He boasts that he knows what to call
Each shown animal,
Even though he's clearly insane.
ASLEEP IN PUBLIC
Our aged Emperor falls asleep in public.
He says the media likes to nitpick.
It's just a blink,
He says with a wink,
But it's really 'cause he's an ancient dick.
Our aged Emperor falls asleep in public.
He says the media likes to nitpick.
It's just a blink,
He says with a wink,
But it's really 'cause he's an ancient dick.
January 2, 2026 at 12:39 PM
ASLEEP IN PUBLIC
Our aged Emperor falls asleep in public.
He says the media likes to nitpick.
It's just a blink,
He says with a wink,
But it's really 'cause he's an ancient dick.
Our aged Emperor falls asleep in public.
He says the media likes to nitpick.
It's just a blink,
He says with a wink,
But it's really 'cause he's an ancient dick.
HE LOVES THE IGNORANT
The Emperor says life can be painless
If you're completely brainless.
That's why he loves the ignorant.
They are so very tolerant,
And believe he's always blameless.
The Emperor says life can be painless
If you're completely brainless.
That's why he loves the ignorant.
They are so very tolerant,
And believe he's always blameless.
January 1, 2026 at 7:58 PM
HE LOVES THE IGNORANT
The Emperor says life can be painless
If you're completely brainless.
That's why he loves the ignorant.
They are so very tolerant,
And believe he's always blameless.
The Emperor says life can be painless
If you're completely brainless.
That's why he loves the ignorant.
They are so very tolerant,
And believe he's always blameless.
POOFY LIPS
The Emperor's women have such poofy lips,
Even those on internships.
They know how to talk the talk
And walk the walk,
And they all have the very same hips.
The Emperor's women have such poofy lips,
Even those on internships.
They know how to talk the talk
And walk the walk,
And they all have the very same hips.
December 31, 2025 at 8:42 AM
POOFY LIPS
The Emperor's women have such poofy lips,
Even those on internships.
They know how to talk the talk
And walk the walk,
And they all have the very same hips.
The Emperor's women have such poofy lips,
Even those on internships.
They know how to talk the talk
And walk the walk,
And they all have the very same hips.
A GREEDY LITTLE CHILD
Even if it's just some cardboard,
The Emperor loves getting an award.
Like a greedy little child,
They just drive him wild,
And he's collected quite a hoard.
Even if it's just some cardboard,
The Emperor loves getting an award.
Like a greedy little child,
They just drive him wild,
And he's collected quite a hoard.
December 30, 2025 at 3:18 PM
A GREEDY LITTLE CHILD
Even if it's just some cardboard,
The Emperor loves getting an award.
Like a greedy little child,
They just drive him wild,
And he's collected quite a hoard.
Even if it's just some cardboard,
The Emperor loves getting an award.
Like a greedy little child,
They just drive him wild,
And he's collected quite a hoard.
A WHORE FOR WAR
The Emperor gloats
When he bombs people and boats.
He is a whore for war,
And he lusts for an encore
When he pours the gore down our throats.
The Emperor gloats
When he bombs people and boats.
He is a whore for war,
And he lusts for an encore
When he pours the gore down our throats.
December 29, 2025 at 1:43 PM
A WHORE FOR WAR
The Emperor gloats
When he bombs people and boats.
He is a whore for war,
And he lusts for an encore
When he pours the gore down our throats.
The Emperor gloats
When he bombs people and boats.
He is a whore for war,
And he lusts for an encore
When he pours the gore down our throats.
CAVORTS WITH SLEAZE
The Emperor cavorts with sleaze
Just as easy as you please.
He accuses others of it,
But he really should admit
That it's his depraved disease.
The Emperor cavorts with sleaze
Just as easy as you please.
He accuses others of it,
But he really should admit
That it's his depraved disease.
December 28, 2025 at 12:20 PM
CAVORTS WITH SLEAZE
The Emperor cavorts with sleaze
Just as easy as you please.
He accuses others of it,
But he really should admit
That it's his depraved disease.
The Emperor cavorts with sleaze
Just as easy as you please.
He accuses others of it,
But he really should admit
That it's his depraved disease.