Obviously there are institutions—eg Liberty University—that will find these demands relatively easy to absorb and consistent with their mission.

Everyone else's job right now is to convince the UVAs and Dartmouths of the world that if they go along, they are Liberty University.

One of the worst myths is that governments, especially at the federal level, follow the same fiscal practices as business. Just maybe they actually fill a role for people that business won't fill because it isn't profitable. Dipshits.

This tweet sent out 14 hours BEFORE the crash needs to be immortalized in stone.

Or on a plaque in every ATC tower.

Or on a disclaimer before every Mayday: Air Disaster episode.

Or on an Amber Alert type system to every American.

Or on a stamp.

Or maybe currency.

Something.

The only way there aren’t elections in 2026/ 2028 is if we allow it to happen. Full stop.

I don’t plan on allowing it to happen - do you?

My neighbor has a Trump christmas sign and...something has just gotta be missing in your life to feel compelled to buy something like that. I'd feel the same to a lesser degree about a Harris sign.

Hi everyone.

The Onion, with the help of the Sandy Hook families, has purchased InfoWars.

We are planning on making it a very funny, very stupid website.

We have retained the services of some Onion and Clickhole Hall of Famers to pull this off.

I can't wait to show you what we have cooked up.