What Do I Know
@dcpacheco.bsky.social
No one is watching. Be good anyway.
Reposted by What Do I Know
Taking care of children is EXHAUSTING.
JUST PAY THE RANSOM ALREADY YOU CHEAPSKATES.
JUST PAY THE RANSOM ALREADY YOU CHEAPSKATES.
September 20, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Taking care of children is EXHAUSTING.
JUST PAY THE RANSOM ALREADY YOU CHEAPSKATES.
JUST PAY THE RANSOM ALREADY YOU CHEAPSKATES.
If your product has a warning sticker on it that says "DO NOT INSERT PENIS INTO THIS PRODUCT" then you know it's been available for sale in the US long enough for there to have been a lawsuit because it DIDN'T have that warning on it.
September 11, 2025 at 2:01 PM
If your product has a warning sticker on it that says "DO NOT INSERT PENIS INTO THIS PRODUCT" then you know it's been available for sale in the US long enough for there to have been a lawsuit because it DIDN'T have that warning on it.
The iPhone is the #1-selling item of all time in the category of "Things to read while on the toilet", just ahead of old editions of The New Yorker.
Unrelated, but guess where I'm posting this from.
Unrelated, but guess where I'm posting this from.
September 11, 2025 at 1:41 PM
The iPhone is the #1-selling item of all time in the category of "Things to read while on the toilet", just ahead of old editions of The New Yorker.
Unrelated, but guess where I'm posting this from.
Unrelated, but guess where I'm posting this from.
Trump: Interest rates should be lower!
Fed: It's a bad idea to lower interest rates when employment is strong.
Trump: Say no more!
Fed: It's a bad idea to lower interest rates when employment is strong.
Trump: Say no more!
September 5, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Trump: Interest rates should be lower!
Fed: It's a bad idea to lower interest rates when employment is strong.
Trump: Say no more!
Fed: It's a bad idea to lower interest rates when employment is strong.
Trump: Say no more!
Toilet? No thanks, I use a skibidibidet.
September 3, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Toilet? No thanks, I use a skibidibidet.
"We have a new feature that will make suggestions that will either be (a) idiotically and trivially obvious, or (b) absolutely blitheringly wrong."
"It's AI, isn't it."
"And it's automatically enabled on your account!"
"Let me guess, you ca--"
"Can't turn it off, correct."
"It's AI, isn't it."
"And it's automatically enabled on your account!"
"Let me guess, you ca--"
"Can't turn it off, correct."
September 3, 2025 at 2:35 PM
"We have a new feature that will make suggestions that will either be (a) idiotically and trivially obvious, or (b) absolutely blitheringly wrong."
"It's AI, isn't it."
"And it's automatically enabled on your account!"
"Let me guess, you ca--"
"Can't turn it off, correct."
"It's AI, isn't it."
"And it's automatically enabled on your account!"
"Let me guess, you ca--"
"Can't turn it off, correct."
ATTENTION: for the purposes of my diet today, mustard counts as a serving of fruit
August 28, 2025 at 5:22 PM
ATTENTION: for the purposes of my diet today, mustard counts as a serving of fruit
Beware the latest viral TikTok challenge where teens film themselves trying to immanentize the eschaton. People can get hurt!
August 6, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Beware the latest viral TikTok challenge where teens film themselves trying to immanentize the eschaton. People can get hurt!
Ironically, this makes me SO ANGRY
August 4, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Ironically, this makes me SO ANGRY
ME: trying to sell thing on eBay, priced it at the price I want
eBay: Yeah, it didn't sell. You should set it to auction starting at $1, the low initial price always attracts interest and can drive the bidding up!
[ THREE DAYS LATER ]
eBay: Congratulations, your item sold for $1
eBay: Yeah, it didn't sell. You should set it to auction starting at $1, the low initial price always attracts interest and can drive the bidding up!
[ THREE DAYS LATER ]
eBay: Congratulations, your item sold for $1
August 3, 2025 at 9:55 PM
ME: trying to sell thing on eBay, priced it at the price I want
eBay: Yeah, it didn't sell. You should set it to auction starting at $1, the low initial price always attracts interest and can drive the bidding up!
[ THREE DAYS LATER ]
eBay: Congratulations, your item sold for $1
eBay: Yeah, it didn't sell. You should set it to auction starting at $1, the low initial price always attracts interest and can drive the bidding up!
[ THREE DAYS LATER ]
eBay: Congratulations, your item sold for $1
His doctor says he's 6'3"? And weighs 224lbs? What kind of incompetent medical professional would release such obvi--
[ FIRES STATISTICIAN FOR GIVING HIM JOB NUMBERS HE DOESN'T LIKE ]
Ooooh, I get it now.
[ FIRES STATISTICIAN FOR GIVING HIM JOB NUMBERS HE DOESN'T LIKE ]
Ooooh, I get it now.
August 3, 2025 at 12:25 PM
His doctor says he's 6'3"? And weighs 224lbs? What kind of incompetent medical professional would release such obvi--
[ FIRES STATISTICIAN FOR GIVING HIM JOB NUMBERS HE DOESN'T LIKE ]
Ooooh, I get it now.
[ FIRES STATISTICIAN FOR GIVING HIM JOB NUMBERS HE DOESN'T LIKE ]
Ooooh, I get it now.
Welcome to the future. All your emails and phone calls now come from robots programmed to scam you, and all the websites make you prove you're not a robot so they can show you fake content slopped together by robots.
August 1, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Welcome to the future. All your emails and phone calls now come from robots programmed to scam you, and all the websites make you prove you're not a robot so they can show you fake content slopped together by robots.
I like to virtue signal by being a normal human being.
August 1, 2025 at 4:11 PM
I like to virtue signal by being a normal human being.
Does anyone know if the tsunami warnings extend to Lake Minnetonka?
July 30, 2025 at 10:12 PM
Does anyone know if the tsunami warnings extend to Lake Minnetonka?
Instead of a eulogy, just read my resume out loud.
And then end it with "David's only regret in life was not spending more time at the office."
And then end it with "David's only regret in life was not spending more time at the office."
July 25, 2025 at 6:41 PM
Instead of a eulogy, just read my resume out loud.
And then end it with "David's only regret in life was not spending more time at the office."
And then end it with "David's only regret in life was not spending more time at the office."
I'm often wrong, but *surprisingly* confident about it.
July 25, 2025 at 4:48 PM
I'm often wrong, but *surprisingly* confident about it.
"You only use 10% of your brain at any time!"
Oh my god! And I only use 50% of the foot pedals in my car at any time too! I guess I should be stomping down as hard as I can on BOTH OF THEM AT ONCE AT ALL TIMES IN ORDER TO MAXIMIZE CAR USAGE!
Oh my god! And I only use 50% of the foot pedals in my car at any time too! I guess I should be stomping down as hard as I can on BOTH OF THEM AT ONCE AT ALL TIMES IN ORDER TO MAXIMIZE CAR USAGE!
July 25, 2025 at 2:15 PM
"You only use 10% of your brain at any time!"
Oh my god! And I only use 50% of the foot pedals in my car at any time too! I guess I should be stomping down as hard as I can on BOTH OF THEM AT ONCE AT ALL TIMES IN ORDER TO MAXIMIZE CAR USAGE!
Oh my god! And I only use 50% of the foot pedals in my car at any time too! I guess I should be stomping down as hard as I can on BOTH OF THEM AT ONCE AT ALL TIMES IN ORDER TO MAXIMIZE CAR USAGE!
My inability to recognize my weaknesses is one of my greatest strengths.
July 25, 2025 at 2:15 PM
My inability to recognize my weaknesses is one of my greatest strengths.
My FICO score went up by 32 points because of all the money I’ve added to my swear jar in 2025 alone.
July 23, 2025 at 10:58 PM
My FICO score went up by 32 points because of all the money I’ve added to my swear jar in 2025 alone.
The notes on my chart from my last doctor's visit say "no gross musculoskeletal defects noted".
Is she flirting with me?
Is she flirting with me?
July 22, 2025 at 1:56 PM
The notes on my chart from my last doctor's visit say "no gross musculoskeletal defects noted".
Is she flirting with me?
Is she flirting with me?
AVAILABLE: 2 tickets to Coldplay at the Excel Center on November
Selling for personal reasons. Very motivated, make an offer.
Selling for personal reasons. Very motivated, make an offer.
July 19, 2025 at 7:58 PM
AVAILABLE: 2 tickets to Coldplay at the Excel Center on November
Selling for personal reasons. Very motivated, make an offer.
Selling for personal reasons. Very motivated, make an offer.
Can you imagine being the inventor of BREAD, one of the most basic food staples that keeps us ALIVE, and then all the credit and kudos go to the dipshit who invented CUTTING IT?
July 17, 2025 at 3:54 PM
Can you imagine being the inventor of BREAD, one of the most basic food staples that keeps us ALIVE, and then all the credit and kudos go to the dipshit who invented CUTTING IT?
THE HORSE I RODE IN ON: "Wait, what?"
July 9, 2025 at 3:45 PM
THE HORSE I RODE IN ON: "Wait, what?"
Israel + Iran were literally fueling planes, dropping bombs and launching missiles while this pathetic shitgibbon posted on his vanity social media sitting on the toilet, begging and laughably "ordering" them to obey a ceasefire that existed only in his imagination
He is the world's laughingstock.
He is the world's laughingstock.
June 24, 2025 at 12:01 PM
Israel + Iran were literally fueling planes, dropping bombs and launching missiles while this pathetic shitgibbon posted on his vanity social media sitting on the toilet, begging and laughably "ordering" them to obey a ceasefire that existed only in his imagination
He is the world's laughingstock.
He is the world's laughingstock.