Dad of twins
@dadoftwins.bsky.social
Father of twins. What I was before or what I like is irrelevant. No hobbies, no time, no life. Nobody told me this before!!!!
Reposted by Dad of twins
Shower thoughts: 🤔 If Elon Musk launched a time travel company, would it be called... Timex? 🚀🕰️ #DeepShowerThoughts #ElonMusk #TimeTravel #Timex
December 16, 2024 at 3:23 PM
Shower thoughts: 🤔 If Elon Musk launched a time travel company, would it be called... Timex? 🚀🕰️ #DeepShowerThoughts #ElonMusk #TimeTravel #Timex
Oh no! We're all doomed! They've discovered Thomas! I'm going to die! #ThomasTrouble
a close up of a thomas the train with a smiley face
ALT: a close up of a thomas the train with a smiley face
media.tenor.com
December 13, 2024 at 7:24 PM
Oh no! We're all doomed! They've discovered Thomas! I'm going to die! #ThomasTrouble
Reposted by Dad of twins
Me: casually opening kitchen drawer
That pesky ass Pancake Flipper:
That pesky ass Pancake Flipper:
a woman in a yellow dress says no you don 't on netflix
ALT: a woman in a yellow dress says no you don 't on netflix
media.tenor.com
December 10, 2024 at 4:40 AM
Me: casually opening kitchen drawer
That pesky ass Pancake Flipper:
That pesky ass Pancake Flipper:
I hope that after this season of Trump, Armando Iannucci will be allowed to make a film about. it.
a man in a military uniform is saying i 'm off to represent the entire red army at the buffet
ALT: a man in a military uniform is saying i 'm off to represent the entire red army at the buffet
media.tenor.com
December 9, 2024 at 5:14 PM
I hope that after this season of Trump, Armando Iannucci will be allowed to make a film about. it.
The boys found a new love, no more Paw Patrol! Thank you #simontofield
a black and white drawing of a man standing in front of a door that says " let me in " on it
ALT: a black and white drawing of a man standing in front of a door that says " let me in " on it
media.tenor.com
December 4, 2024 at 10:10 PM
The boys found a new love, no more Paw Patrol! Thank you #simontofield
Made some pancakes for the boys. Fluffy af as God intended. 🥞
November 30, 2024 at 5:58 PM
Made some pancakes for the boys. Fluffy af as God intended. 🥞
After a long research I present you some facts(?): An Olympic swimming pool contains about two acre feet of water, or 4.168e+8 imperial teaspoons for non farmers
November 23, 2024 at 6:26 AM
After a long research I present you some facts(?): An Olympic swimming pool contains about two acre feet of water, or 4.168e+8 imperial teaspoons for non farmers
Having twins is like living in an active war zone. You never know where or when the next battle will erupt, but one thing’s for sure—it’ll kick off in the next five minutes!
November 22, 2024 at 7:57 PM
Having twins is like living in an active war zone. You never know where or when the next battle will erupt, but one thing’s for sure—it’ll kick off in the next five minutes!
I’m ending a long-running tradition of naming my cats after Kennedy family members. But on second thought, maybe it’s fitting—they always seem to have worms too!
November 21, 2024 at 5:15 PM
I’m ending a long-running tradition of naming my cats after Kennedy family members. But on second thought, maybe it’s fitting—they always seem to have worms too!
I had surgery 2 weeks ago. I told my assistant to tell people I was getting a penis enlargement... fragile ego, baby! 🤣 That's how rumors start, folks! #surgerysecrets #egoissues #rumormill
November 19, 2024 at 5:10 PM
I had surgery 2 weeks ago. I told my assistant to tell people I was getting a penis enlargement... fragile ego, baby! 🤣 That's how rumors start, folks! #surgerysecrets #egoissues #rumormill
I was tucking my robot lawnmower (AI) in for its winter nap. It’s my best buddy now because while I was cleaning its spot, it lit up the dark corner to help me see. When I left, it turned off. Came back, it lit up again. Best buddy forever!
November 15, 2024 at 7:24 PM
I was tucking my robot lawnmower (AI) in for its winter nap. It’s my best buddy now because while I was cleaning its spot, it lit up the dark corner to help me see. When I left, it turned off. Came back, it lit up again. Best buddy forever!
Your mother lived all the way into her mid-90s, right?
Yeah. She said to me, “This is ridiculous,” held my hand and died. Isn’t that great? #ridleyscott
Yeah. She said to me, “This is ridiculous,” held my hand and died. Isn’t that great? #ridleyscott
November 7, 2024 at 2:29 PM
Your mother lived all the way into her mid-90s, right?
Yeah. She said to me, “This is ridiculous,” held my hand and died. Isn’t that great? #ridleyscott
Yeah. She said to me, “This is ridiculous,” held my hand and died. Isn’t that great? #ridleyscott
One of my proudest dad moments: convinced my twins I don’t like gummy bears. Now, when they ask, I just say, “Gummy bears? No clue! Ask your mum when she’s home.” 😄 #DadHacks #gummybears
October 29, 2024 at 9:43 PM
One of my proudest dad moments: convinced my twins I don’t like gummy bears. Now, when they ask, I just say, “Gummy bears? No clue! Ask your mum when she’s home.” 😄 #DadHacks #gummybears
Twin facts: One twin is making number two, while the other stays behind him and take a number one in the narrow opening, likely peeing all over twin number one and the entire bathroom.
October 25, 2024 at 4:13 PM
Twin facts: One twin is making number two, while the other stays behind him and take a number one in the narrow opening, likely peeing all over twin number one and the entire bathroom.
the coffee machine keeps me going to this day. These were the best investments of my life
October 25, 2024 at 3:59 PM
the coffee machine keeps me going to this day. These were the best investments of my life
Right before the twins were born, I purchased two things that I truly believe saved my sanity and my life: a fully automated formula machine and a fully automated coffee machine. The formula machine saved me precious sleep time (after I placed it directly next to my bed).
October 25, 2024 at 3:58 PM
Right before the twins were born, I purchased two things that I truly believe saved my sanity and my life: a fully automated formula machine and a fully automated coffee machine. The formula machine saved me precious sleep time (after I placed it directly next to my bed).