Admiral Butterscotch
@classicscorpio.bsky.social
What are you, a cop?
He assures me of the quality. “Barrel aged to perfection for seven years.” But I know when I’m being scammed. There’s no way they could fit more than two monkeys in there tops.
December 8, 2025 at 3:01 AM
He assures me of the quality. “Barrel aged to perfection for seven years.” But I know when I’m being scammed. There’s no way they could fit more than two monkeys in there tops.
Seals are loud and insane because they’ve seen Cthulhu
December 4, 2025 at 3:51 AM
Seals are loud and insane because they’ve seen Cthulhu
I heard the phrase “iPhone pocket” and I thought “omg they’re making a small iPhone again.” You can imagine my disappointment when it turned out to be the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen instead.
November 11, 2025 at 8:21 PM
I heard the phrase “iPhone pocket” and I thought “omg they’re making a small iPhone again.” You can imagine my disappointment when it turned out to be the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen instead.
Oatmeal is great if you like mush with a hint of what might be a flavor.
October 21, 2025 at 2:36 PM
Oatmeal is great if you like mush with a hint of what might be a flavor.
I don’t know if “socially awkward” is the right term for me, because I’m weird as fuck when I’m alone, too.
July 22, 2025 at 4:59 PM
I don’t know if “socially awkward” is the right term for me, because I’m weird as fuck when I’m alone, too.
He’s a 10 but he just unleashed a fart so heinous he knows he will be judged for it at the pearly gates
July 17, 2025 at 4:04 AM
He’s a 10 but he just unleashed a fart so heinous he knows he will be judged for it at the pearly gates
What if you’re driving and you hear a honk and you think it’s a car but you turn around and it’s a huge goose? What then?
July 15, 2025 at 5:25 PM
What if you’re driving and you hear a honk and you think it’s a car but you turn around and it’s a huge goose? What then?
Imagine going to ALF’s home planet and finding out cats are worshipped like gods there.
July 2, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Imagine going to ALF’s home planet and finding out cats are worshipped like gods there.
I have no followers so I can post whatever I want. You have never been this free.
July 1, 2025 at 6:59 PM
I have no followers so I can post whatever I want. You have never been this free.
My 3 year old nephew thinks my bald head is “yucky” but he’s the least aerodynamic child I’ve ever seen.
June 16, 2025 at 2:36 PM
My 3 year old nephew thinks my bald head is “yucky” but he’s the least aerodynamic child I’ve ever seen.
Saw a lady on the train with fingernails longer than her fingers. She was operating her phone flawlessly. Anyway I think velociraptors would’ve been unstoppable with the right technology.
June 13, 2025 at 12:28 PM
Saw a lady on the train with fingernails longer than her fingers. She was operating her phone flawlessly. Anyway I think velociraptors would’ve been unstoppable with the right technology.
New invention idea: cornflakes that make you masturbate more.
June 12, 2025 at 12:30 PM
New invention idea: cornflakes that make you masturbate more.
If man was created in God’s image, that means God has a weakness: the spine.
June 11, 2025 at 3:20 PM
If man was created in God’s image, that means God has a weakness: the spine.