Bazecraze
@bazecraze.bsky.social
Just some guy who definitely doesn’t write for a late night show.
Dow jumps 400 points after Trump says “I want the Dow to jump 400 points”.
October 13, 2025 at 10:07 PM
Dow jumps 400 points after Trump says “I want the Dow to jump 400 points”.
I am ready to fall into savings.
October 1, 2025 at 6:29 PM
I am ready to fall into savings.
This is like watching the 12th round of a fight that should have been stopped in the 10th.
Trump: "It's too much liquid. Too many different things are going into that baby at too big a number. The size of this thing when you look at it. It's like 80 different vaccines and beyond vaccines."
September 22, 2025 at 10:13 PM
This is like watching the 12th round of a fight that should have been stopped in the 10th.
Congratulations to Host and Musical Guest on their engagement!
August 26, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Congratulations to Host and Musical Guest on their engagement!
I don’t understand the “how do I explain this to my kids” argument. Nobody explained shit to us. You learned from your RA when you got to college.
August 25, 2025 at 6:08 PM
I don’t understand the “how do I explain this to my kids” argument. Nobody explained shit to us. You learned from your RA when you got to college.
Ms Now is what a sarcastic grandma calls Rachel Maddow.
August 18, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Ms Now is what a sarcastic grandma calls Rachel Maddow.
I didn’t reinvent myself. I just added a clock.
August 6, 2025 at 3:51 PM
I didn’t reinvent myself. I just added a clock.
So much of the MAGA movement is just guys who were turned away from rollercoasters.
July 20, 2025 at 7:24 PM
So much of the MAGA movement is just guys who were turned away from rollercoasters.
It was so surprising when the camera landed on those two people at the Coldplay concert and they were both awake.
July 18, 2025 at 6:16 PM
It was so surprising when the camera landed on those two people at the Coldplay concert and they were both awake.
Damn, first we’re ignored by the Emmys, now this!
Donald Trump has just weighed in on last night's news that CBS is canceling The Late Show with Stephen Colbert—and, unsurprisingly, he’s celebrating (and taking aim at several other late-night hosts along the way).
Trump Celebrates Colbert’s Cancellation, Swipes at Kimmel and Fallon
Donald Trump has just weighed in on last night's news that CBS is canceling The Late Show with Stephen Colbert—and, unsurprisingly, he’s celebrating (and taking aim at several other late-night hosts along the way).
dlvr.it
July 18, 2025 at 3:42 PM
Damn, first we’re ignored by the Emmys, now this!
Zohran Mamdani once drove past a field full of cows and didn’t say “cows”.
July 8, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Zohran Mamdani once drove past a field full of cows and didn’t say “cows”.
Are you still talking about the plums in the icebox??The plums you were probably saving for breakfast have been talked about for years!! So sweet and so cold.
July 8, 2025 at 6:10 PM
Are you still talking about the plums in the icebox??The plums you were probably saving for breakfast have been talked about for years!! So sweet and so cold.
Beyond feckless. He has negative feck. The man owes feck.
July 2, 2025 at 4:31 AM
Beyond feckless. He has negative feck. The man owes feck.
Remember, spray it in front of you and then walk into traffic.
July 1, 2025 at 2:21 AM
Remember, spray it in front of you and then walk into traffic.
“So-and-so must resign” starting to feel like “Godzilla should stop it”.
June 30, 2025 at 2:36 PM
“So-and-so must resign” starting to feel like “Godzilla should stop it”.
If New York elects a progressive, all the rich people will pack up and move to wherever Cuomo lives.
June 20, 2025 at 5:21 AM
If New York elects a progressive, all the rich people will pack up and move to wherever Cuomo lives.
Waiting for Congress to act is like waiting for your Lyft that was 3 minutes away and is now 7 minutes away.
June 13, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Waiting for Congress to act is like waiting for your Lyft that was 3 minutes away and is now 7 minutes away.
Trump being dismantled by an African immigrant is vibish.
June 5, 2025 at 7:57 PM
Trump being dismantled by an African immigrant is vibish.
We didn’t have a word for “polycule” in my day. We just said “improv theatre”.
June 3, 2025 at 8:47 PM
We didn’t have a word for “polycule” in my day. We just said “improv theatre”.
The conservative movement is basically people who ditched senior year to go drink at the tree and think that’s as good as going to class.
May 31, 2025 at 9:39 PM
The conservative movement is basically people who ditched senior year to go drink at the tree and think that’s as good as going to class.
Went into a room and forgot why I went in there and Jake Tapper wrote a book about me.
May 20, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Went into a room and forgot why I went in there and Jake Tapper wrote a book about me.
We got a pope who won’t pronounce the “h” in “catholic”.
May 8, 2025 at 5:57 PM
We got a pope who won’t pronounce the “h” in “catholic”.
Didn’t there used to be Congress?
May 4, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Didn’t there used to be Congress?
We’re gonna be saying Merry Christmas again, but sarcastically.
April 30, 2025 at 7:06 PM
We’re gonna be saying Merry Christmas again, but sarcastically.