avery
@averyavery22.bsky.social
Just chronically online
HMJ chat 🤟🏻
she/her
HMJ chat 🤟🏻
she/her
This iconic song being on the post-inauguration playlist is sending me in the best way possible!!
January 2, 2026 at 5:01 AM
This iconic song being on the post-inauguration playlist is sending me in the best way possible!!
Me being expected to go back to real life after binging all of Heated Rivalry in a day. (Apologies for being so late to the party.)
January 2, 2026 at 12:10 AM
Me being expected to go back to real life after binging all of Heated Rivalry in a day. (Apologies for being so late to the party.)
Tomorrow is my first day back at work after two weeks off and, idk, I just don’t think the 9-5 life is meant for me. I’m meant to run my little errands, watch my little shows, and read my little books.
January 1, 2026 at 6:43 PM
Tomorrow is my first day back at work after two weeks off and, idk, I just don’t think the 9-5 life is meant for me. I’m meant to run my little errands, watch my little shows, and read my little books.
Wait, I’ve heard this joke somewhere before…
January 1, 2026 at 12:58 AM
Wait, I’ve heard this joke somewhere before…
I got invited to a New Year’s party that STARTS at 10 and I’m just like, that’s when I usually Irish goodbye.
January 1, 2026 at 12:06 AM
I got invited to a New Year’s party that STARTS at 10 and I’m just like, that’s when I usually Irish goodbye.
My 2025 resolution was to try and not buy any new clothes and only shop at thrift and consignment stores. After 364 1/2-ish days, the only new thing I purchased was a bridesmaid dress, so I consider that a win. Going to try and keep it going in 2026 because your girl needs to be better at saving. 🙏🏻
December 31, 2025 at 8:21 PM
My 2025 resolution was to try and not buy any new clothes and only shop at thrift and consignment stores. After 364 1/2-ish days, the only new thing I purchased was a bridesmaid dress, so I consider that a win. Going to try and keep it going in 2026 because your girl needs to be better at saving. 🙏🏻
Divas with fine hair, what shampoo/conditioner are we using?
December 31, 2025 at 2:17 AM
Divas with fine hair, what shampoo/conditioner are we using?
I’m not really sure what Kevin’s (🐈⬛) plan is once he finally succeeds in tripping me down the stairs and I plummet to my death.
December 30, 2025 at 11:07 PM
I’m not really sure what Kevin’s (🐈⬛) plan is once he finally succeeds in tripping me down the stairs and I plummet to my death.
Started watching Bridgerton for the first time (just finished season 2, so no spoilers pls) but OMG, I HATE the Featheringtons, minus Penelope, and their entire story line. And they have so much screen time and for what???
December 29, 2025 at 9:37 PM
Started watching Bridgerton for the first time (just finished season 2, so no spoilers pls) but OMG, I HATE the Featheringtons, minus Penelope, and their entire story line. And they have so much screen time and for what???
My grandma said something about the navy and I so badly wanted to respond with this but that humor would be wasted on the current audience
squidward from spongebob is holding a can and says not the navy !!!
Alt: squidward from spongebob saying ‘not the navy’
media.tenor.com
December 28, 2025 at 2:13 AM
My grandma said something about the navy and I so badly wanted to respond with this but that humor would be wasted on the current audience
I think we peaked as a civilization with the Pop-Tarts Bowl.
December 27, 2025 at 8:47 PM
I think we peaked as a civilization with the Pop-Tarts Bowl.
My sister got a dog to help with her anxiety and now he has anxiety. So she got a second dog to help with his anxiety and you’ll never guess what happened.
December 26, 2025 at 5:43 PM
My sister got a dog to help with her anxiety and now he has anxiety. So she got a second dog to help with his anxiety and you’ll never guess what happened.
Would you like that cat baguette style, cinnamon rolled, or in a loaf?
December 26, 2025 at 4:08 PM
Would you like that cat baguette style, cinnamon rolled, or in a loaf?
It was the biggest of dogs, it was the smallest of dogs.
December 25, 2025 at 2:45 AM
It was the biggest of dogs, it was the smallest of dogs.
I’m not a super handy person, but one thing I can do is switch out old light switches/outlets without electrocuting myself.
December 23, 2025 at 3:39 AM
I’m not a super handy person, but one thing I can do is switch out old light switches/outlets without electrocuting myself.
Not my algorithm thinking I like boxing now. It was a very unique one-time exception that I enjoyed.
December 22, 2025 at 5:41 PM
Not my algorithm thinking I like boxing now. It was a very unique one-time exception that I enjoyed.
‘Your cat is not your child.’ Okay, then you tell me why he straight up pretends like he doesn’t hear me calling his name and doesn’t let me use the bathroom alone.
December 22, 2025 at 3:33 AM
‘Your cat is not your child.’ Okay, then you tell me why he straight up pretends like he doesn’t hear me calling his name and doesn’t let me use the bathroom alone.
Love when the cameraman can get some artsy shots at work
December 21, 2025 at 4:45 AM
Love when the cameraman can get some artsy shots at work
You want me to pay $6 per wallpaper sample and then another $6 in shipping on top of that?? In this economy?!
December 20, 2025 at 9:18 PM
You want me to pay $6 per wallpaper sample and then another $6 in shipping on top of that?? In this economy?!
Caught Kevin mid yawn but he looks like he’s just heard the funniest joke of his life.
December 19, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Caught Kevin mid yawn but he looks like he’s just heard the funniest joke of his life.
I went to a tarot card reading for the first time and she said that I was deceiving myself about something and she didn’t see love for me in the new year. Is that okay?????
December 19, 2025 at 4:53 PM
I went to a tarot card reading for the first time and she said that I was deceiving myself about something and she didn’t see love for me in the new year. Is that okay?????
*slams laptop shut* *smashes it with a hammer* *pours water on it* *tosses it out the window of a moving car*
Until 2026 ✌🏻
Until 2026 ✌🏻
December 17, 2025 at 11:38 PM
*slams laptop shut* *smashes it with a hammer* *pours water on it* *tosses it out the window of a moving car*
Until 2026 ✌🏻
Until 2026 ✌🏻
Me after being able to casually drop the anecdote that Benjamin Franklin electrocuted turkeys using the Schuylkill River in a conversation.
December 17, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Me after being able to casually drop the anecdote that Benjamin Franklin electrocuted turkeys using the Schuylkill River in a conversation.
The photos of those awful people that Vanity Fair posted on their IG today are giving Joe playing Waverly Academy vibes and honestly, LOVE that for them.
December 16, 2025 at 9:09 PM
The photos of those awful people that Vanity Fair posted on their IG today are giving Joe playing Waverly Academy vibes and honestly, LOVE that for them.
Rewatching Scandal to *FEEL* something
a woman in a suit is standing in a hallway next to a man in uniform .
Alt: a woman in a suit is standing in a hallway next to a man in uniform .
media.tenor.com
December 16, 2025 at 4:56 AM
Rewatching Scandal to *FEEL* something