damn I hate gay Halloween. What do you mean you’re the transatlantic accent personified?

Bryce Dallas Coward

It’s wild that everything awful happening right now in America can be traced back to a group dudes getting mad that someone tried to give the Ghostbusters big fucking milkers

@hillaryclinton.bsky.social it’s my cat’s birthday today

damn this is cold blooded

when you get an MRI the doctors will tell you it feels like you’re peeing but your not. jokes on you doc I have chosen this exact moment to voluntarily piss myself

I don’t understand how anyone can go to a shooting range. They’re so loud. Even with expensive earplugs in I still can hear every gun screaming “grab me grab me end your pain”

🎶I fly like paper
get high like planes
when they catch me at the border
I can show them racist memes🎶

A board game where you have to get through college as a bisexual without pissing off your conservative parents so much that they stop paying for your tuition called Don’t Woke Daddy

squatting on this incase one day my dingle coin goes to $0.0005 and I need to make a social media presence for my yacht