I have to be strong for everyone I know without anything in return, and it weighs so heavy on my heart that I think I'm pushing the edge of collapse, even if im in adolescence. I feel like im being forced into a facade I can't even play properly.

Even though I hate it, I'd prefer if I was just a fleeting memory to everyone, so no one would miss me if I was dead.

I hate bottling up my emotions but its all I do.

I wish I had a better pain tolerance so I can take the pain my stomach's giving me. Maybe if I did I could starve myself and I wouldn't be as fucking fat as I am now. I wish you could see the outline of my bones. I wish my jawline was sharper. I wish I didn't look like this.

I can't take this anymore I might throw away all my dreams and become a fucking prostitute for some attention, even if it's negative. I want to be seen for being me and not for all I achieve.

my mom doesn't do anything about my problems until it affects her and her image. I'm afraid to become like her, but I know with how desensitized to things now I'm not too far off. I hate her. I hate her. I love her too. What is this feeling?

I'm worth less than a damn paper. No one actually wants to listen or care about me, even when I work so hard to gain recognition, even from my mom. It hurts. it hurts. it hurts. it hurts. maybe I should jump off my roof for an ounce of attention.

i hate having bad coping mechanisms but then i just create more for myself , i don't even know what to do anymore