When my toddler needs help in the bathroom but also wants privacy
January 4, 2026 at 8:41 PM
When my toddler needs help in the bathroom but also wants privacy
I don’t care who this pisses off, there are only three genders: Coke, Diet Coke, and Coke Zero.
January 4, 2026 at 4:51 AM
I don’t care who this pisses off, there are only three genders: Coke, Diet Coke, and Coke Zero.
You just know Democrats are going to find the most useless response to Trump’s illegal war actions in Venezuela. My current bet is Schumer and Jeffries having a moment of silence outside an empanada joint.
January 3, 2026 at 1:08 PM
You just know Democrats are going to find the most useless response to Trump’s illegal war actions in Venezuela. My current bet is Schumer and Jeffries having a moment of silence outside an empanada joint.
I watched Holy Mountain because I saw this still frame from it and thought “Wow that looks crazy” and it was probably the least crazy moment in the entire movie.
January 3, 2026 at 5:28 AM
I watched Holy Mountain because I saw this still frame from it and thought “Wow that looks crazy” and it was probably the least crazy moment in the entire movie.
Instead of arguing about Marty Supreme or One Battle After Another, I recommend watching Sentimental Value
December 30, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Instead of arguing about Marty Supreme or One Battle After Another, I recommend watching Sentimental Value
There should be an Oscar for best movie under 100 minutes, and the category should be called Actual Best Picture
December 29, 2025 at 4:10 AM
There should be an Oscar for best movie under 100 minutes, and the category should be called Actual Best Picture
Anytime you see an article about artificial intelligence, just replace “AI” with “refrigerator magnate poetry”
America, you have spoken loud and clear: You do not like AI. But what if AI is the way to restart the world’s idea machine?
We’re running out of good ideas. AI might be how we find new ones.
What if the best use of AI is restarting the world’s idea machine?
www.vox.com
December 26, 2025 at 2:36 AM
Anytime you see an article about artificial intelligence, just replace “AI” with “refrigerator magnate poetry”
Elf is such an old movie it was supposed to be a surprise when Zoey Deschanel sings, and not a relief that she wasn’t also playing the ukulele.
December 25, 2025 at 6:49 PM
Elf is such an old movie it was supposed to be a surprise when Zoey Deschanel sings, and not a relief that she wasn’t also playing the ukulele.
The better the episode of Pluribus, the worse the greenscreen, and the finale had a real doozy of bad greenscreen.
December 24, 2025 at 4:41 PM
The better the episode of Pluribus, the worse the greenscreen, and the finale had a real doozy of bad greenscreen.
Why is every Alejandro Iñárritu movie titled Honker: The Tragic Dissolution of Ego Through Success
December 19, 2025 at 5:28 AM
Why is every Alejandro Iñárritu movie titled Honker: The Tragic Dissolution of Ego Through Success
It’s a law that in TV shows when a character uses a hose to siphon gas from an old car they have to get a little in their mouth and spit it out. The government doesn’t want you to know how delicious gasoline is because if it became common knowledge demand would skyrocket crippling the world economy.
December 13, 2025 at 2:54 AM
It’s a law that in TV shows when a character uses a hose to siphon gas from an old car they have to get a little in their mouth and spit it out. The government doesn’t want you to know how delicious gasoline is because if it became common knowledge demand would skyrocket crippling the world economy.
Eating militarized spicy wings. Taking a polygraph test. Dancing down a hallway lined with conscribed TV show staff. It’s fun how we turned promotional work into public humiliation for celebrities. You want me to see your movie? First read a bunch of mean things people said about you online.
December 11, 2025 at 3:36 AM
Eating militarized spicy wings. Taking a polygraph test. Dancing down a hallway lined with conscribed TV show staff. It’s fun how we turned promotional work into public humiliation for celebrities. You want me to see your movie? First read a bunch of mean things people said about you online.
Honestly it was pretty cool of Cuomo to let us embarrass him twice in six months.
November 5, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Honestly it was pretty cool of Cuomo to let us embarrass him twice in six months.
My cartoon in this week’s issue of The New Yorker
October 13, 2025 at 3:00 PM
My cartoon in this week’s issue of The New Yorker
“There IS a spoon and liberals ignore it at their peril” - Ezra Klein in The Matrix.
October 1, 2025 at 8:00 PM
“There IS a spoon and liberals ignore it at their peril” - Ezra Klein in The Matrix.
If Raiders of the Lost Ark came out today it would be viewed as political and divisive. Well anyway, One Battle After Another is really great.
September 27, 2025 at 6:51 PM
If Raiders of the Lost Ark came out today it would be viewed as political and divisive. Well anyway, One Battle After Another is really great.
Did Saudi Arabia spend more money to get Pete Davidson to do stand-up or to kill Pete Davidson’s father?
September 27, 2025 at 2:48 PM
Did Saudi Arabia spend more money to get Pete Davidson to do stand-up or to kill Pete Davidson’s father?
Saw a stranger post online about how much they love a show I think is pretty bad, and I really let them have it*
*Their own opinion. Some people have bad taste, and you can just quietly feel superior to them.
*Their own opinion. Some people have bad taste, and you can just quietly feel superior to them.
September 26, 2025 at 1:36 AM
Saw a stranger post online about how much they love a show I think is pretty bad, and I really let them have it*
*Their own opinion. Some people have bad taste, and you can just quietly feel superior to them.
*Their own opinion. Some people have bad taste, and you can just quietly feel superior to them.
People write about Trump the way they write about AI, projecting intellect and intentionality onto something that is just stringing words together.
September 25, 2025 at 3:11 PM
People write about Trump the way they write about AI, projecting intellect and intentionality onto something that is just stringing words together.
If you’re pregnant and taking medical advice from Trump, your child has a lot more to worry about than autism.
September 23, 2025 at 1:24 PM
If you’re pregnant and taking medical advice from Trump, your child has a lot more to worry about than autism.
I still think about the family in this article by @ashleyrparker.bsky.social from 2011. The parents believed the rapture was coming and spent all their money getting the word out while their children could do nothing but watch. I wish someone would follow up on them. www.nytimes.com/2011/05/20/u...
September 22, 2025 at 10:50 PM
I still think about the family in this article by @ashleyrparker.bsky.social from 2011. The parents believed the rapture was coming and spent all their money getting the word out while their children could do nothing but watch. I wish someone would follow up on them. www.nytimes.com/2011/05/20/u...
The only upside to this one is that I can actually do something since like a normal person I don’t have Paramount+
September 18, 2025 at 11:56 PM
The only upside to this one is that I can actually do something since like a normal person I don’t have Paramount+
Taking Kimmel off the air because he displeased the President is about as clear cut as fascism gets. Bad, bad, very bad. But to do it right after the Emmys when it will be least helpful for Jimmy to win one next year? Cold blooded.
September 18, 2025 at 2:33 AM
Taking Kimmel off the air because he displeased the President is about as clear cut as fascism gets. Bad, bad, very bad. But to do it right after the Emmys when it will be least helpful for Jimmy to win one next year? Cold blooded.
Me: Gets on the subway
My phone: Ahh, where are we? Are you lost and dying? Should I connect to a satellite to save us?
Subway pulls into station
My phone: Here’s a text from Maybe Jon Ossoff that came in a minute ago
Subway leaves station
My phone: TAP THIS BUTTON AND I’LL CALL US A MEDIVAC!
My phone: Ahh, where are we? Are you lost and dying? Should I connect to a satellite to save us?
Subway pulls into station
My phone: Here’s a text from Maybe Jon Ossoff that came in a minute ago
Subway leaves station
My phone: TAP THIS BUTTON AND I’LL CALL US A MEDIVAC!
September 17, 2025 at 10:07 PM
Me: Gets on the subway
My phone: Ahh, where are we? Are you lost and dying? Should I connect to a satellite to save us?
Subway pulls into station
My phone: Here’s a text from Maybe Jon Ossoff that came in a minute ago
Subway leaves station
My phone: TAP THIS BUTTON AND I’LL CALL US A MEDIVAC!
My phone: Ahh, where are we? Are you lost and dying? Should I connect to a satellite to save us?
Subway pulls into station
My phone: Here’s a text from Maybe Jon Ossoff that came in a minute ago
Subway leaves station
My phone: TAP THIS BUTTON AND I’LL CALL US A MEDIVAC!
When people I agree with do something, it is okay. When people I disagree with do the same thing it is not okay. This is not a double standard, it’s a single standard: Do I agree with you? Be someone I agree with and you’ll find me to be very fair.
September 16, 2025 at 5:09 PM
When people I agree with do something, it is okay. When people I disagree with do the same thing it is not okay. This is not a double standard, it’s a single standard: Do I agree with you? Be someone I agree with and you’ll find me to be very fair.