Seriously Fox. Focus. I know it seems like a lot to handle, but commit to getting that entire bag of dicks down, you scurrilous pack of festering cock-wombles. #FoxNews

Yes. The LA fires are stressful and have the whole city on edge, but if Fox News could just eat a big bag of dicks and stop scaring my Mom on the other side of the country about it, that would be just swell. #foxnews