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zachofthenorth.bsky.social
zach of the north pole
@zachofthenorth.bsky.social
380 followers 330 following 920 posts
porcelain / ivory / steel, chin / tits / shoe, and unfortunately the toronto maple leafs. he/him. canadian.

my pro wrestling madness is on full display at @hitmanshades.bsky.social

Fix your heart or die.

Profile picture by @sanrixian.bsky.social
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zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Time to remove one of those pop culture blind spots
Promotional image for HBO’s “OZ” A green-tinted door with the title “OZ” in green lettering. There is a very small window in the door, large enough only to see the eyes of a man who is standing right on the other side.
December 2, 2025 at 12:13 AM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
I’ve recently rediscovered that movies exist; they really are quite novel!
My ‘last four’: Blue Velvet (3 stars) Sinners (5 stars, marked as reviewed) Weapons (4 stars) Mean Girls (4.5 stars, marked as a rewatch)
November 7, 2025 at 8:55 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Really putting both the “NC-17” and “D” in NCC 1701-D
Screenshot of two posts, one each from two different Star Trek TNG gimmick accounts. In the first, the account “Worf Email” (worfemail.bsky.social) posts, “Engineering, The current ship-wide malfunctions might be related to an attachment I emailed to lieutenant commander La Forge recently. Worf” The second post is from the “Riker Googling” account (rikergoogling.bsky.social): “average klingon penis size” Worf, of course, is a Klingon character.
October 29, 2025 at 8:19 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Me at 3am: okay. 18th inning. I am very happy to have stayed up to watch this epic game of baseball

Me at 1:45pm:
Screenshot from Final Fantasy IX. The summoned eidolon, Atomos, is seen in a grey-green sky outside the castle of Alexandria. It is sporting a gaping maw that has to be 300 feet across and 400 feet tall.
October 28, 2025 at 5:49 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults—Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe—living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.
From Game Changer season 5, “Battle Royale”, six of the players are on set reacting to something wild happening out of frame. Left to right: Ally Beardsley, Tao Yang, Rekha Shankar, Jacob Wysocki, Vic Michaels, Lily Du
October 23, 2025 at 3:47 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
ok sure
Screenshot (from my work computer…shhhh!) of ai propaganda disguised as a news item, “3 ways ai is helping the planet” by Vanessa Ho
October 15, 2025 at 3:04 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
My coffee looks like it kidnapped the princess and is holding her in another castle
A “bird’s eye view” photo of my Tim hortons coffee. The lid design includes an impression similar to the maple leaf. Two of the points of the maple leaf have slightly dried and darkened coffee in them. This resembles little triangular eyes with the opening of the lid resembling a large mouth and the flap of that opening resembling a snout. The overall effect is that this looks like Bowser’s face from the Super Mario Bros games
October 14, 2025 at 5:08 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Beautiful afternoon for a ball game
The view of the skydome outfield from my seat for today’s blue jays game The view of the skydome infield from my seat for today’s blue jays game
September 14, 2025 at 6:04 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
I’ve been saying it for 20+ years, the hives forever, forever the hives

What a gift to find on a Friday morning
Partial spotify screenshot, showing the cover image of the latest release from The Hives. The album cover image shows all five members of the band posing together rather seriously, wearing large crowns and large regal robes. The album title is The Hives Forever Forever The Hives.
August 15, 2025 at 12:58 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Boss ain’t here, step-boss ain’t here, and within an hour or so I ain’t gonna be here, either. I am not made for this
Partial weather app screenshot. At the top of the image: Weather alert Heat warning. These conditions started at 11:56AM (EDT) Monday, August 11 Below and to the left, it shows the high today (32°C) is 7° higher than the average To the right, it shows that it “feels like” 32° already, without having reached the high temp of the day Phew.
August 11, 2025 at 6:29 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Skyline magic is BACK
A skyline screenshot of two adjacent skeets. The more recent post is from “Star Trek Minus Context”, and features an image of Capt Jean Luc Picard in what looks to me like a bathing suit, and an unbuttoned pale blue shirt, tits out. He is sitting on a chair, and he is looking at something offscreen. The caption at the bottom shows he has just said, “Ah.” The next post is from “Butt teeth! Butt Teeth! Butt teeth!”, and says Newfoundland is the greatest place on earth The post includes a photo of the road signs at the intersection of (unknown) VILLAGE RD & CUCKHOLD’S COVE RD
June 25, 2025 at 11:12 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Seems fine.
Severe Weather Alert Heat Warning Severity: Severe Significant threat to life or property Weather event onset 11:00AM (EDT) , June 22 Description Dangerous heat and humidity beginning Sunday afternoon. The first significant heat event of the season with dangerously hot and humid conditions will begin Sunday afternoon and is expected to continue into the week What: Daytime highs of 31 to 36 degrees Celsius. Humid values of 40to 45. Overnight lows of 21 to 25 degrees Celsius, providing little relief from the heat When: Sunday afternoon to Tuesday night
June 21, 2025 at 1:50 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
A horny jail meme based on the Jail space in the board game, Monopoly. On the right side of the image is a crude drawing of a person behind bars, with the text “IN HORNY JAIL”. It is on an orange background To the left is a portion of the space with a light teal background, the text “JUST VISITING” in large capital letters in the centre of this area. There is also a maps app pin above the text, which says inside, “I AM HERE”
June 4, 2025 at 8:58 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Turns out if one listens to the cancon “daily mix” long enough spotify does in fact give you all you really want
Spotify screenshot of All I Really Want by Alanis Morissette, with the note at the top, “Playing recommended songs”. The song was the opener from her breakout 1995 album Jagged Little Pill. It’s still a favourite after 30 years, and brightened my lunch hour more than I would have expected when it started up
June 3, 2025 at 5:27 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Back in the old wba days, I made a case for why Michael Clayton, canonically *and legally* one of the greatest movies ever made, should be the group watch. I am lifting the “wba exclusive” embargo on my arguments:
A notes app screenshot dated December 22, 2021: Why you should vote for Michael Clayton Sometimes I have a problem being brief when I have as much raw material as , “why you should vote for Michael Clayton”, so I’ll try sticking with point form notes and see how this goes. Feel free to read in an impassioned voice, because, dammit, I mean it when I say, you should vote for Michael Clayton: - right away, most obvious one, it has George Clooney. Mileage varies on Clooney for some people, I suppose, but this is mid-2000s Clooney, this is “I’ve made my money, and now I want to make Films” Clooney, in short, this is Top of His Game Clooney - friends, it has Tilda Swinton; as they say in comic books, “‘NUFF SAID” - But there’s more. It has intrigue and conspiracy and corporate greed and Sidney Pollack in Film Lawyer Suspenders - This is “a” legal thriller in the way that Parasite is “a” social commentary, which is to say that this is THE legal thriller. I’m not f-cking around here; we’ve been calling movies “legal thrillers” for decades, and this film fulfills the promise of the phrase. It is such a good legal thriller that it actually traverses time back to the onset of ‘talkies’ and births the genre from scratch, like the main character in a Chuck Palahniuk novel or something - Okay I lied: I’m going to go back to Tilda Swinton. Swinton is a FORCE. People think of Tilda Swinton and what comes up are the strange-ish otherworldly roles from like fantasy/sci-fi movies and her indie credits, I think of Tilda Swinton and what comes up is her twitching and frowning in her Michael Clayton pantsuits - The ending…. I mean, what can I say. Nothing, because it transcends description, and also I don’t want to spoil anything, but mostly [near-uncontrollable head movements and fast blinking] I don’t think I could do it justice In summary, Michael Clayton is a feast of a film, and you should vote for it See first image for alt text See first image for alt text
May 15, 2025 at 3:48 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
First one I’ve ever seen in the wild, I almost didn’t believe they actually exist
A photo of an unrelentingly ugly cybertruck. The vehicle — which is an abomination and an affront to gods and men (gender-neutral) — is parked in the driveway of a business across the street from where I’ve taken the photo. It is a colour of dull gray that is best described as “the colour of your dad’s 57 year old pliers, found in the red toolbox, no, the other red toolbox, next to the ladder”. There is some guy getting back into the passenger seat after dropping something off at the business they’re parked in front of. I’ve obscured the license plate, although the dumb motherfucker who owns this thing definitely should have to deal with being publicly outed as the worst person in town.
May 12, 2025 at 4:46 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Zuck: the average american has three friends
Still from House of the Dragon, season 2 Otto Hightower, Alicent Hightower, and (ugh) Criston Cole are in the Small Council chambers of the Red Keep
May 1, 2025 at 3:41 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Some drama developing on the uss enterprise, I think
Skyline screenshot of two adjacent skeets: The first post is from the account, Worf Email (worfemail.bsky.social), which says “High Council Administrator, I accept your invitation to the bat’leth tournament. I will not require a +1. Worf” The second is from Riker Googling (rikergoogling.bsky.social), “how to prove to a klingon that i have honor”
April 29, 2025 at 8:09 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Bluesky screenshot showing the photo of Gef’s skeet and the next post on my skyline. The next post also includes a picture, of a person’s crossed legs while they are sitting, one hand in front of one knee is holding a cigarette. That picture appears to be a screenshot from a movie or tv show, with captioning at the bottom reading, “My idols are dead and my enemies are in power” While not entirely lining up with each other, the two pictures from these adjacent posts are spaced in a way that looks a little bit like the torso of the person pictured in gef’s post belongs to the legs pictured in the other post (or vice versa, depending on your own opinion of whether a torso belongs to its legs or the legs to its torso; I’m mostly ambivalent on that particular issue, but power to you, either way, dear traveler)
April 16, 2025 at 7:50 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Sheesh, even spotify feels they need to remind me that not everything is about me
Spotify “daylist” screen shot. On a yellow/blue gradient background, spotify tells me that today is a “windows down main character monday afternoon” Suggested ‘genres’ are: “windows down, main character, hot girl walk, summer, bubblegum pop, and pink pilates princess”
March 31, 2025 at 6:14 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Let’s fkn go lol
Screenshot excerpt from the article I’m quote-posting: “Broken Social Scene — mobilize. Code word: It’s ALL gonna break.”
March 27, 2025 at 5:15 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
A man sitting on a classically old-fashioned armchair outside at night. He’s drinking a glass of whiskey, with a red gas can at his foot. Behind him, a house is fully on fire. (Hangman did nothing wrong 🤼‍♂️)
March 12, 2025 at 5:55 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
House of the Dragon character, Dameon Targaryen, rider of the dragon, Caraxes. He is in battle armour, reading a letter written to him and his allies during war time. His allies stand behind him, also in armour. Caraxes is not shown, but for context he is a red dragon with an extremely long neck. I call Caraxes “the long neck of the law”, since daemon used to run the king’s landing police force (booooo) known as the City Watch.
January 10, 2025 at 6:41 PM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Extremely back on my bullshit
The A Game of Thrones board game. The photo is taken from the perspective of the Targaryen starting positions, in essos. Several of the various pieces are visible: purple for Targaryen, yellow for Baratheon, blue for Arryn, red for Lannister, green for Tyrell, black for Greyjoy, and (not quite so visible) grey for stark A photo of the Daenerys Targaryen “house card”. The upper corner indicates a strength of 4, which really makes more sense if you’ve played the game — sorry. It’s just that the rules are a little complicated. Regardless, Dany is shown on the card lounging on a bed or couch, and her dragon, Drogon, is visible in the background. They’re both looking in the same direction, towards the left edge of the card. Her card ability reads: After combat, your opponent must discard a number of their available power tokens equal to the difference of the final combat strengths. Again, that maybe makes more sense to people who have played the game, but it means I can screw the other players beyond the battle, in addition to having used my strongest card in the battle
January 5, 2025 at 1:11 AM
zachofthenorth.bsky.social
Tonight you’ll be visited by three spirits.

The spirits:
From the final season of LOST: Jack Sheppard, The Man in Black (very rudely wearing John Locke’s body), and Desmond Hume make their way through the jungle.
December 24, 2024 at 4:58 PM