vanta greige
@ultramaricon.gay
i write about sex, race, and art
DMs by carrier pigeon only
please bully me off this app my hands hurt
he/him
free 🇵🇸
opinions expressed here are not my employer's and often not even my own
guys i just realized I've had a crush on chef Bobby Flay for 30 years
November 27, 2025 at 6:51 PM
guys i just realized I've had a crush on chef Bobby Flay for 30 years
also: no, and i am
It Happened To Me: a student asked if I'm ok, i look tired (I'm just old)
November 26, 2025 at 2:45 AM
also: no, and i am
It Happened To Me: a student asked if I'm ok, i look tired (I'm just old)
November 26, 2025 at 2:44 AM
It Happened To Me: a student asked if I'm ok, i look tired (I'm just old)
the way university administrators pit staff and faculty against each other, and reward this dynamic, is really, really bad
November 25, 2025 at 8:45 PM
the way university administrators pit staff and faculty against each other, and reward this dynamic, is really, really bad
i had not been following the news today, so it was incredibly jarring to open the Internet and immediately see the photo of Mamdani at the oval office, my immediate question was what is AI doing on the front pages of the nytimes
November 22, 2025 at 12:20 AM
i had not been following the news today, so it was incredibly jarring to open the Internet and immediately see the photo of Mamdani at the oval office, my immediate question was what is AI doing on the front pages of the nytimes
my life's chronology of poetic themes and maybe yours:
cats
deaths of cats
cats with powers
pining (no cats)
sex (def no cats)
relationships (they're like a cat)
break ups (no cats again)
metaphysical (cats, but are they?)
parenting (all prior cats)
aging (nature, cats implied)
cats
deaths of cats
cats with powers
pining (no cats)
sex (def no cats)
relationships (they're like a cat)
break ups (no cats again)
metaphysical (cats, but are they?)
parenting (all prior cats)
aging (nature, cats implied)
November 19, 2025 at 6:36 PM
my life's chronology of poetic themes and maybe yours:
cats
deaths of cats
cats with powers
pining (no cats)
sex (def no cats)
relationships (they're like a cat)
break ups (no cats again)
metaphysical (cats, but are they?)
parenting (all prior cats)
aging (nature, cats implied)
cats
deaths of cats
cats with powers
pining (no cats)
sex (def no cats)
relationships (they're like a cat)
break ups (no cats again)
metaphysical (cats, but are they?)
parenting (all prior cats)
aging (nature, cats implied)
the juxtaposition would be ironic if it wasn't so utterly consistent
in San Diego the radio station that switches to 24/7 Christmas music for over a month every year is the only station on which I've heard the disgusting Kristi Noem ICE recruitment ad
November 19, 2025 at 5:53 PM
the juxtaposition would be ironic if it wasn't so utterly consistent
in San Diego the radio station that switches to 24/7 Christmas music for over a month every year is the only station on which I've heard the disgusting Kristi Noem ICE recruitment ad
November 19, 2025 at 5:51 PM
in San Diego the radio station that switches to 24/7 Christmas music for over a month every year is the only station on which I've heard the disgusting Kristi Noem ICE recruitment ad
not that anyone has accused me of kidding, but I'm not
November 17, 2025 at 5:05 PM
not that anyone has accused me of kidding, but I'm not
i was very confused about which of the 8 kids at day care is Nolan until the Thanksgiving sign-up sheet revealed that there are 3 Nolans. that's a 37.5% incidence of Nolan among children aged 1-4.
November 17, 2025 at 4:55 PM
i was very confused about which of the 8 kids at day care is Nolan until the Thanksgiving sign-up sheet revealed that there are 3 Nolans. that's a 37.5% incidence of Nolan among children aged 1-4.
i regret to inform my moral upright self that my morally ambivalent self has gone to the Just Walk Out supersurveillance convenience store on campus 3 times now for the daily little can of cola i should be boycotting :(
November 12, 2025 at 10:35 PM
i regret to inform my moral upright self that my morally ambivalent self has gone to the Just Walk Out supersurveillance convenience store on campus 3 times now for the daily little can of cola i should be boycotting :(
there has to be some kind of conspiracy among the top brass to make Target as icky as possible one memo at a time
"Store employees are now required to smile if they are within 10 feet of a shopper.
They also must make eye contact with and wave to or greet the customer.
If they’re within four feet, the employee should ask how the customer’s day is going or if they need help."
🙄 Won't stop the boycott, y'all.
They also must make eye contact with and wave to or greet the customer.
If they’re within four feet, the employee should ask how the customer’s day is going or if they need help."
🙄 Won't stop the boycott, y'all.
Target is now requiring its employees to smile more
As the holiday season fast approaches, Target is urging its employees to add a little more “jolly” to their work routine.
www.wilx.com
November 8, 2025 at 5:28 PM
there has to be some kind of conspiracy among the top brass to make Target as icky as possible one memo at a time
if i said "i just ate my morning bratwurst" how does that make you feel
November 8, 2025 at 5:14 PM
if i said "i just ate my morning bratwurst" how does that make you feel
hernia repair is like wearing Spanx on the inside
November 8, 2025 at 4:30 PM
hernia repair is like wearing Spanx on the inside
"i can't imagine what that would smell like historically speaking, I'm so ruined by the modern accessibility of soap" -evergreen reflection on my historical gay romance discord
November 7, 2025 at 10:06 PM
"i can't imagine what that would smell like historically speaking, I'm so ruined by the modern accessibility of soap" -evergreen reflection on my historical gay romance discord
do you guys still think about the yak milk in Prince's refrigerator sometimes
November 7, 2025 at 3:42 AM
do you guys still think about the yak milk in Prince's refrigerator sometimes
Reposted by vanta greige
I ruined this workplace and I’d do it again
November 6, 2025 at 4:07 PM
I ruined this workplace and I’d do it again
cuntocratic slaycialism
November 6, 2025 at 4:09 PM
cuntocratic slaycialism
if i ever write a tv show there will be a scene where a 17-year-old twink side character is trying to get the wifi password at a funeral and no one will give it to him
November 6, 2025 at 2:07 AM
if i ever write a tv show there will be a scene where a 17-year-old twink side character is trying to get the wifi password at a funeral and no one will give it to him
set county results to Richmond for a lil laugh
Decision Desk has called the NYC mayors race for Zohran Mamdani.
November 5, 2025 at 2:16 AM
set county results to Richmond for a lil laugh
Reposted by vanta greige
"More than 60 professors and others up and down the state say they are suppressing their work and feel anxious about causing political problems for their campus, or that their own teaching will lead to hostility against themselves. Some say it’s already happened." www.sfchronicle.com/california/a...
UC professors censor their own classes waiting for Trump’s crackdown, court filings show
New court filings reveal University of California professors are altering lessons, canceling talks and avoiding sensitive topics as the Trump administration’s crackdown intensifies.
www.sfchronicle.com
November 4, 2025 at 9:55 PM
"More than 60 professors and others up and down the state say they are suppressing their work and feel anxious about causing political problems for their campus, or that their own teaching will lead to hostility against themselves. Some say it’s already happened." www.sfchronicle.com/california/a...
when i eat string cheese i just bite right into because i'm an adult
November 4, 2025 at 5:14 PM
when i eat string cheese i just bite right into because i'm an adult
microwaving those gel heat packs is terrifying
November 4, 2025 at 4:35 PM
microwaving those gel heat packs is terrifying
telling people "i'll ask Google Gemini" to check their vibe
November 4, 2025 at 4:27 PM
telling people "i'll ask Google Gemini" to check their vibe
do we know any nice guys named Dick? just wondering for no reason
November 4, 2025 at 4:15 PM
do we know any nice guys named Dick? just wondering for no reason