Amanda Batty
@thechaosbarbie.bsky.social
✨ an imperfect human focused on becoming a better no one… and shower cake.✨
Chaos Barbie sorts through the chaos and minutiae of existence. With a machete.
Spectrum Circus™ + Trauma Shaman™
(being a jerk = fastest block ever.)
lnk.bio/amandabatty
June 25, 2025 at 9:51 PM
I see way too many people talking about a general strike, and far too few people speaking of a tax strike.
You want real change?! KEEP YOUR DAMN MONEY.
Watch how fast shit changes.
If even everyday Americans stopped paying taxes, it would cripple them.
Stop funding your own oppression.
You want real change?! KEEP YOUR DAMN MONEY.
Watch how fast shit changes.
If even everyday Americans stopped paying taxes, it would cripple them.
Stop funding your own oppression.
June 23, 2025 at 8:16 PM
I see way too many people talking about a general strike, and far too few people speaking of a tax strike.
You want real change?! KEEP YOUR DAMN MONEY.
Watch how fast shit changes.
If even everyday Americans stopped paying taxes, it would cripple them.
Stop funding your own oppression.
You want real change?! KEEP YOUR DAMN MONEY.
Watch how fast shit changes.
If even everyday Americans stopped paying taxes, it would cripple them.
Stop funding your own oppression.
So I don’t do the ‘unfettered access’ thing anymore, because I only allow people who earn it to have access to me — I also don’t stay anywhere I’m not valued, appreciated, respected and loved.
Life is too short.
And if you like what I post here, you might like it there even more. 😉✨
Life is too short.
And if you like what I post here, you might like it there even more. 😉✨
May 5, 2025 at 11:29 PM
So I don’t do the ‘unfettered access’ thing anymore, because I only allow people who earn it to have access to me — I also don’t stay anywhere I’m not valued, appreciated, respected and loved.
Life is too short.
And if you like what I post here, you might like it there even more. 😉✨
Life is too short.
And if you like what I post here, you might like it there even more. 😉✨
Why should you subscribe to my 0F, or my Substack?? Because of the post below, and because I’m not trying to be perfect, or even perfectly sexy — and those are the places where the best stuff all lives now after nearly 15 years of the world having unfettered access to me + my inner workings.
…
…
May 5, 2025 at 11:29 PM
Why should you subscribe to my 0F, or my Substack?? Because of the post below, and because I’m not trying to be perfect, or even perfectly sexy — and those are the places where the best stuff all lives now after nearly 15 years of the world having unfettered access to me + my inner workings.
…
…
• OnlyFans *IS* legitimate, ‘real work’ — just like owning my bike shop, my electrical + HVAC/R and my professional athletic careers all were.
If you don’t like it, don’t pay for it — just scroll past.
You don’t have to issue moral judgment on everyone for everything.
✨⚡️✨
lnk.bio/amandabatty
If you don’t like it, don’t pay for it — just scroll past.
You don’t have to issue moral judgment on everyone for everything.
✨⚡️✨
lnk.bio/amandabatty
May 2, 2025 at 11:36 PM
• OnlyFans *IS* legitimate, ‘real work’ — just like owning my bike shop, my electrical + HVAC/R and my professional athletic careers all were.
If you don’t like it, don’t pay for it — just scroll past.
You don’t have to issue moral judgment on everyone for everything.
✨⚡️✨
lnk.bio/amandabatty
If you don’t like it, don’t pay for it — just scroll past.
You don’t have to issue moral judgment on everyone for everything.
✨⚡️✨
lnk.bio/amandabatty
⚡️ 💡 ⚡️
Q: What’s the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnancy?
A: It’s actually possible to unscrew a lightbulb.
Here’s your Friday reminder:
• not every OnlyFans account is the same,
• my OnlyFans channel exists because I DO respect myself,
• it can be flirty, silly, sexy AND educational,
Q: What’s the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnancy?
A: It’s actually possible to unscrew a lightbulb.
Here’s your Friday reminder:
• not every OnlyFans account is the same,
• my OnlyFans channel exists because I DO respect myself,
• it can be flirty, silly, sexy AND educational,
May 2, 2025 at 11:36 PM
⚡️ 💡 ⚡️
Q: What’s the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnancy?
A: It’s actually possible to unscrew a lightbulb.
Here’s your Friday reminder:
• not every OnlyFans account is the same,
• my OnlyFans channel exists because I DO respect myself,
• it can be flirty, silly, sexy AND educational,
Q: What’s the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnancy?
A: It’s actually possible to unscrew a lightbulb.
Here’s your Friday reminder:
• not every OnlyFans account is the same,
• my OnlyFans channel exists because I DO respect myself,
• it can be flirty, silly, sexy AND educational,
Built, painted and *finally* hung the screen door… thrilled with how it turned out, honestly.
NOW WE JUST NEED WARM WEATHER. 🤣😂
NOW WE JUST NEED WARM WEATHER. 🤣😂
March 16, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Built, painted and *finally* hung the screen door… thrilled with how it turned out, honestly.
NOW WE JUST NEED WARM WEATHER. 🤣😂
NOW WE JUST NEED WARM WEATHER. 🤣😂
There were 50 million Americans in the streets for months in 2020 — and what did it get us? Expanded police budgets? GREAT! 🙄🙄🙄
March 16, 2025 at 5:55 AM
There were 50 million Americans in the streets for months in 2020 — and what did it get us? Expanded police budgets? GREAT! 🙄🙄🙄
I’m making social media all about food again: SORRY NOT SORRY.
I’m proud of today’s lunch salad: marinated margarita grilled chicken I cooked last night (yes, it’s got tequila + agave + citrus in it), the citrus vinaigrette I just made to go with it & greens, goat cheese and carmelized onions.
I’m proud of today’s lunch salad: marinated margarita grilled chicken I cooked last night (yes, it’s got tequila + agave + citrus in it), the citrus vinaigrette I just made to go with it & greens, goat cheese and carmelized onions.
March 14, 2025 at 9:12 PM
I’m making social media all about food again: SORRY NOT SORRY.
I’m proud of today’s lunch salad: marinated margarita grilled chicken I cooked last night (yes, it’s got tequila + agave + citrus in it), the citrus vinaigrette I just made to go with it & greens, goat cheese and carmelized onions.
I’m proud of today’s lunch salad: marinated margarita grilled chicken I cooked last night (yes, it’s got tequila + agave + citrus in it), the citrus vinaigrette I just made to go with it & greens, goat cheese and carmelized onions.
I’ve created the world’s best chocolate chip cookie, which, as a lifelong fat kid, is a big fucking statement.
Absolutely amazed at these.
*Perfectly* crunchy outsides, soft insides, not too dense, sweet AND savory (not too sweet!) with a few tones of deeper richness.
Wow.
Absolutely amazed at these.
*Perfectly* crunchy outsides, soft insides, not too dense, sweet AND savory (not too sweet!) with a few tones of deeper richness.
Wow.
March 14, 2025 at 7:45 PM
I’ve created the world’s best chocolate chip cookie, which, as a lifelong fat kid, is a big fucking statement.
Absolutely amazed at these.
*Perfectly* crunchy outsides, soft insides, not too dense, sweet AND savory (not too sweet!) with a few tones of deeper richness.
Wow.
Absolutely amazed at these.
*Perfectly* crunchy outsides, soft insides, not too dense, sweet AND savory (not too sweet!) with a few tones of deeper richness.
Wow.
I need to find the weird, outdoorsy, irreverent, big dog-having, cookie-making, blood moon seance-throwing, snarkily slutty, bike-addicted AuDHD side of BlueSky, WITH A QUICKNESS, because the political madness in my feed is making me not wanna be here anymore.
WHERE ARE MY PEOPLE AT?!
Today:
WHERE ARE MY PEOPLE AT?!
Today:
March 14, 2025 at 5:59 AM
I need to find the weird, outdoorsy, irreverent, big dog-having, cookie-making, blood moon seance-throwing, snarkily slutty, bike-addicted AuDHD side of BlueSky, WITH A QUICKNESS, because the political madness in my feed is making me not wanna be here anymore.
WHERE ARE MY PEOPLE AT?!
Today:
WHERE ARE MY PEOPLE AT?!
Today:
Every good anti-hero arc begins with a black turtleneck, some audacity, and a whole lot of rage. BELIEVE IT.
March 4, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Every good anti-hero arc begins with a black turtleneck, some audacity, and a whole lot of rage. BELIEVE IT.
Hey Portland, OR:
February 25, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Hey Portland, OR:
Yes, there IS a real and legitimate OnlyStans, but it’s *literally* just shirtless me in a shop apron changing tubes and tires, and teaching you how to put a 4mm in the valve hole so your rim strip won’t slip.
… and making dumb jokes, because DUH. 🙄🤣
Yes, I AM pretty fucking hilarious. ✨⚡️
… and making dumb jokes, because DUH. 🙄🤣
Yes, I AM pretty fucking hilarious. ✨⚡️
February 11, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Yes, there IS a real and legitimate OnlyStans, but it’s *literally* just shirtless me in a shop apron changing tubes and tires, and teaching you how to put a 4mm in the valve hole so your rim strip won’t slip.
… and making dumb jokes, because DUH. 🙄🤣
Yes, I AM pretty fucking hilarious. ✨⚡️
… and making dumb jokes, because DUH. 🙄🤣
Yes, I AM pretty fucking hilarious. ✨⚡️
In *this* house, we believe that the only good cop is a dead cop.
… and that includes ICE.
… and that includes ICE.
February 11, 2025 at 3:47 PM
In *this* house, we believe that the only good cop is a dead cop.
… and that includes ICE.
… and that includes ICE.
Does anyone else in Portland do obnoxiously-early AM uphill ski laps at Timberline?
My goal is to get out there at least once per week (twice if possible) for the rest of the season — it’s just myself and Koba!
My goal is to get out there at least once per week (twice if possible) for the rest of the season — it’s just myself and Koba!
February 10, 2025 at 12:27 AM
Does anyone else in Portland do obnoxiously-early AM uphill ski laps at Timberline?
My goal is to get out there at least once per week (twice if possible) for the rest of the season — it’s just myself and Koba!
My goal is to get out there at least once per week (twice if possible) for the rest of the season — it’s just myself and Koba!
5/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
Do NOT let them weaponize your own neurobiological systems against you AND everyone else. Do not give them that power, because that’s all they have left right now, and they know it.
Do NOT let them weaponize your own neurobiological systems against you AND everyone else. Do not give them that power, because that’s all they have left right now, and they know it.
January 29, 2025 at 11:53 PM
5/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
Do NOT let them weaponize your own neurobiological systems against you AND everyone else. Do not give them that power, because that’s all they have left right now, and they know it.
Do NOT let them weaponize your own neurobiological systems against you AND everyone else. Do not give them that power, because that’s all they have left right now, and they know it.
4/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
There is no fight without covering the basics for ourselves, first and foremost, and making sure that our neurochemical processes are as stable as humanly possible — that’s the ONLY way any of us survive this.
There is no fight without covering the basics for ourselves, first and foremost, and making sure that our neurochemical processes are as stable as humanly possible — that’s the ONLY way any of us survive this.
January 29, 2025 at 11:50 PM
4/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
There is no fight without covering the basics for ourselves, first and foremost, and making sure that our neurochemical processes are as stable as humanly possible — that’s the ONLY way any of us survive this.
There is no fight without covering the basics for ourselves, first and foremost, and making sure that our neurochemical processes are as stable as humanly possible — that’s the ONLY way any of us survive this.
3/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
This is about our own systems regulation as individuals so that we can empathize with each other AND operate effectively during what’s already happening and about to come.
This is about our own systems regulation as individuals so that we can empathize with each other AND operate effectively during what’s already happening and about to come.
January 29, 2025 at 11:47 PM
3/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
This is about our own systems regulation as individuals so that we can empathize with each other AND operate effectively during what’s already happening and about to come.
This is about our own systems regulation as individuals so that we can empathize with each other AND operate effectively during what’s already happening and about to come.
2/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
Yes, I AM an expert in this, because I’ve lived through it for the last six years and came out 1) alive, 2) still fighting and 3) with the ability to tell you what I learned.
Yes, I AM an expert in this, because I’ve lived through it for the last six years and came out 1) alive, 2) still fighting and 3) with the ability to tell you what I learned.
January 29, 2025 at 11:45 PM
2/5: overwhelm, despair and loss, and how those things influence how we fight back.
Yes, I AM an expert in this, because I’ve lived through it for the last six years and came out 1) alive, 2) still fighting and 3) with the ability to tell you what I learned.
Yes, I AM an expert in this, because I’ve lived through it for the last six years and came out 1) alive, 2) still fighting and 3) with the ability to tell you what I learned.
Babe, if you’re overwhelmed and in despair right now, you’re giving them exactly what they want and need from you right now.Here’s why:
(5 x 1-minute videos — 1/5)
(5 x 1-minute videos — 1/5)
January 29, 2025 at 11:42 PM
Babe, if you’re overwhelmed and in despair right now, you’re giving them exactly what they want and need from you right now.Here’s why:
(5 x 1-minute videos — 1/5)
(5 x 1-minute videos — 1/5)
Dear white people: stop pretending that you “don’t know what to do” — yes, you do.
We’ve been here before.
Your fear of doing what needs to be done is not lack of knowledge — it’s cowardice.
⚡️
We’ve been here before.
Your fear of doing what needs to be done is not lack of knowledge — it’s cowardice.
⚡️
January 29, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Dear white people: stop pretending that you “don’t know what to do” — yes, you do.
We’ve been here before.
Your fear of doing what needs to be done is not lack of knowledge — it’s cowardice.
⚡️
We’ve been here before.
Your fear of doing what needs to be done is not lack of knowledge — it’s cowardice.
⚡️
Trust me: I already wrote out a response to him about it — but cut it and wrote what I actually responded with just to kickstart the conversation, because if he’s gonna waste my time, the least I can do is virtually castrate him. 😉
January 29, 2025 at 6:54 PM
Trust me: I already wrote out a response to him about it — but cut it and wrote what I actually responded with just to kickstart the conversation, because if he’s gonna waste my time, the least I can do is virtually castrate him. 😉