slymehaus
@slymehaus.bsky.social
I once saw Gwendolyn Christie in person and damn
December 1, 2025 at 11:41 PM
I once saw Gwendolyn Christie in person and damn
I’m very perfected my leftover strategy - put it all on puff pastry with an egg on top
December 1, 2025 at 1:00 AM
I’m very perfected my leftover strategy - put it all on puff pastry with an egg on top
We’ve made it to the vet and the gabapentin has accomplished very little
November 28, 2025 at 5:04 PM
We’ve made it to the vet and the gabapentin has accomplished very little
I just had to dose this cat with medication. Thank god for neosporin
November 28, 2025 at 1:48 PM
I just had to dose this cat with medication. Thank god for neosporin
The bathroom door at work is making a totally different sound now and I can’t figure out why
November 25, 2025 at 8:07 PM
The bathroom door at work is making a totally different sound now and I can’t figure out why
Going into manhattan is great. I just got the meanest side eye from one twink and four blonde women simultaneously
November 23, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Going into manhattan is great. I just got the meanest side eye from one twink and four blonde women simultaneously
I just had to do a panel with someone that I immediately disliked and I think they disliked me
November 21, 2025 at 11:07 PM
I just had to do a panel with someone that I immediately disliked and I think they disliked me
Overheard while taking the bus: “Hey you, yeah you. You look like I know you. What’s your mom’s name?”
November 19, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Overheard while taking the bus: “Hey you, yeah you. You look like I know you. What’s your mom’s name?”
Are you even married if you spouse isn’t keeping up by reading madrigal lyrics?
November 19, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Are you even married if you spouse isn’t keeping up by reading madrigal lyrics?
I desperately want one of those shitty cupcakes you get in an unwieldy plastic container at a grocery store. Preferably bright pink frosting
November 17, 2025 at 1:54 AM
I desperately want one of those shitty cupcakes you get in an unwieldy plastic container at a grocery store. Preferably bright pink frosting
Called in sick, got acupuncture, and am now watching TikTok’s from a bunch of Cuomo voters while in the bath 🤌
November 5, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Called in sick, got acupuncture, and am now watching TikTok’s from a bunch of Cuomo voters while in the bath 🤌
I know this isn’t a novel observation but it is really nuts that Schumer hasn’t endorsed Mamdani. “Blue no matter who” lol
November 3, 2025 at 11:58 PM
I know this isn’t a novel observation but it is really nuts that Schumer hasn’t endorsed Mamdani. “Blue no matter who” lol
I just watched a TikTok that said dishes were a “kitchen trend making a comeback.”
November 2, 2025 at 4:47 PM
I just watched a TikTok that said dishes were a “kitchen trend making a comeback.”
It’s hard to get back to feeling good moving your body after health nonsense. I will take any fun exercise (or honestly just any kind of movement) suggestions
November 1, 2025 at 11:51 PM
It’s hard to get back to feeling good moving your body after health nonsense. I will take any fun exercise (or honestly just any kind of movement) suggestions
Few movies give you the thrill of a well executed but believable robbery like The Friends of Eddie Coyle
November 1, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Few movies give you the thrill of a well executed but believable robbery like The Friends of Eddie Coyle
My biggest achievement is coming up with the movie category “Men Who Don’t Know When To Leave.”
October 31, 2025 at 1:08 AM
My biggest achievement is coming up with the movie category “Men Who Don’t Know When To Leave.”
Watching another Hammer-style horror movie tonight, and here’s a good rule of thumb - if you are a cis dude, and some lady says, “I don’t know, I think we should leave. There’s a bad vibe,” just leave.
October 31, 2025 at 1:03 AM
Watching another Hammer-style horror movie tonight, and here’s a good rule of thumb - if you are a cis dude, and some lady says, “I don’t know, I think we should leave. There’s a bad vibe,” just leave.
I am definitely superstitious but I’ll say this — I’m never getting got by a witchcraft cult in an English manor while in an antiques buying trip
October 30, 2025 at 2:18 AM
I am definitely superstitious but I’ll say this — I’m never getting got by a witchcraft cult in an English manor while in an antiques buying trip
With all my health issues, people like to note how lucky I am to have good health insurance. While that is totally true, it really isn’t the best way to comfort someone
October 27, 2025 at 12:46 PM
With all my health issues, people like to note how lucky I am to have good health insurance. While that is totally true, it really isn’t the best way to comfort someone
Paprika lentils and squash over egg noodles with dill and chive yogurt sauce. I love cold weather meals.
October 25, 2025 at 11:31 PM
Paprika lentils and squash over egg noodles with dill and chive yogurt sauce. I love cold weather meals.
How can a 12 lbs cat take a shit so smelly that my entire apartment becomes uninhabitable? Like damn what is that little guy eating cause this smell can’t possibly just be from digested cat food
October 23, 2025 at 1:53 AM
How can a 12 lbs cat take a shit so smelly that my entire apartment becomes uninhabitable? Like damn what is that little guy eating cause this smell can’t possibly just be from digested cat food
My dumbass republican cousin has a $90 fucking teacup on her wedding registry. A teacup!
October 23, 2025 at 12:31 AM
My dumbass republican cousin has a $90 fucking teacup on her wedding registry. A teacup!
Influencers making tiropita with only feta and no farmer’s cheese is going to be the reason I take a dive off the manhattan bridge
October 21, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Influencers making tiropita with only feta and no farmer’s cheese is going to be the reason I take a dive off the manhattan bridge
I take the bus through Middle Village (a conservative neighborhood in Queens) and I love seeing 100% Curtis Sliwa signs and no Cuomo
October 15, 2025 at 12:49 PM
I take the bus through Middle Village (a conservative neighborhood in Queens) and I love seeing 100% Curtis Sliwa signs and no Cuomo