...i just get the dregs of information that make it into group chats and passing references from mutual friends. it's not a great feeling, but short of messaging every single friend constantly to ask about their job, i don't really know how to stay informed about their lives the way i'd like to

but facebook was never showing me my actual friends' posts anyway so i feel like i can't have missed that much from there. i suspect often it's just there's a lot of one one-on-one contact that i don't have (bc i'm not as close to those people, or bc my health stops me doing stuff) and then...

protip if your fellow band member has been imprinted on by a stranger and keeps trying to bring you into the conversation it's probably because they Don't Want To Be In That Conversation and would like some backup kicking the random person off the Literal Stage, Come On, What Is This Shit

also i am notably WAY more drained and migrainey today than i would have expected to be after a gig of that length. probably because i couldn't rest or drink water or look after myself due to being cornered by a stranger the entire night 🙃

the class is only like 11 people so this is a pretty big proportion of it. two people left partway through the afternoon yesterday and i don't know if they'll be back today so i may have just lost the two least annoying people in the class

is there anything worse in a classroom situation than 4-5 people who a) think they know more than the teacher and b) need to be right all the time

okay well the sports massage didn't *fix* the headache but on the plus side i think it hurts less to move my jaw than it did before and maybe also my neck hurts less so it's possible this will eventually filter through to improved head function

oof that does sound like it would get grating fast

there are a few people on here that I find myself irritated by to a disproportionate extent considering i don't, for the most part, *disagree* with their takes... but the certainty of the assertions with limited nuance rubs me up the wrong way

in fact i feel the more you know about any given topic the more reluctant you tend to be to give a concrete answer because the answer is usually It Depends or maybe It's More Complicated Than That

taking a gamble and booking a last minute sports massage for this evening. sometimes this makes it worse but occasionally it fixes it so if I'm lucky this will be one of the latter type and frankly. i am desperate. i will take anything really at this point.

i have shit to DO and i cannot do it while it feels like somebody is compressing my fucking skull

NOTHING HELPS. painkillers don't help, even codeine. muscle roller and self-massage of my neck doesn't help. changing pillows doesn't help. going to bed early doesn't help. eye drops don't help. it ranges from "uncomfortable" to "unbearable" in severity but it never goes away and i'm going insane

indeed. and then the parts that have a reasonable number of people are desolate wastelands when it comes to shops/amenities (e.g. kings hedges, orchard park). chesterton is pretty good, it's just far enough out to be pleasant and just central enough to have some actual amenities.

(i still don't like london, it's way too big for me and the physical demands of getting around those kinds of distances are too much for my health, but cambridge and also york have the opposite problem where their small size, although convenient, makes crowds suffocating.)