He needs to grow the beard out because he looks like (and moves like) the other players’ dad
November 10, 2025 at 2:43 AM
He needs to grow the beard out because he looks like (and moves like) the other players’ dad
It’s gotta be so demoralizing for the rest of the staff
November 8, 2025 at 6:37 PM
It’s gotta be so demoralizing for the rest of the staff
He should get that thing on his chin looked at
November 8, 2025 at 3:20 PM
He should get that thing on his chin looked at
“Wait. They can taste worse? Back to the lab boys!”—Overheard at Quest
November 8, 2025 at 3:17 PM
“Wait. They can taste worse? Back to the lab boys!”—Overheard at Quest
The what awards now?
November 7, 2025 at 5:08 AM
The what awards now?
It'll be interesting to see how the majority on USSC says that temporarily freezing the order to provide food to the hungry "while we sort this out" won't create serious or permanent harm.
November 6, 2025 at 11:28 PM
It'll be interesting to see how the majority on USSC says that temporarily freezing the order to provide food to the hungry "while we sort this out" won't create serious or permanent harm.
TIL the Schmenge Brothers had relatives
November 6, 2025 at 11:21 PM
TIL the Schmenge Brothers had relatives
PS Thank you! I meant to start with that.
November 6, 2025 at 11:17 PM
PS Thank you! I meant to start with that.
This rules. I miss Old Twitter sometimes.
November 6, 2025 at 11:17 PM
This rules. I miss Old Twitter sometimes.
Was the jury instructed on the definition of "sandwich," and, if so, did the definition include "hot dog"?
November 6, 2025 at 7:35 PM
Was the jury instructed on the definition of "sandwich," and, if so, did the definition include "hot dog"?
The folks at the International Olympics Committee are saying, "Man, that's pretty shameless."
November 5, 2025 at 6:46 PM
The folks at the International Olympics Committee are saying, "Man, that's pretty shameless."
This is perfect. Lots of parking. No sidewalks. Nowhere to walk to anyway.
November 5, 2025 at 4:09 AM
This is perfect. Lots of parking. No sidewalks. Nowhere to walk to anyway.
I want a library. Settlements accepted. DM me for my Venmo
November 4, 2025 at 4:28 AM
I want a library. Settlements accepted. DM me for my Venmo
Your so right. I know how you feel.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
November 4, 2025 at 12:49 AM
Your so right. I know how you feel.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
And yet his kid…
November 3, 2025 at 5:13 AM
And yet his kid…
I can think of other ways he could help the residents of NYC more directly than by giving $5M to Andrew to spend on tv and YouTube ads
November 1, 2025 at 5:13 AM
I can think of other ways he could help the residents of NYC more directly than by giving $5M to Andrew to spend on tv and YouTube ads
I'm no expert on human psychology, but I fear that the type of young man who acts on this "advice" will become a serial killer after crossing maybe three state lines. The waitresses he hassles in the first few states truly are the fortunate ones.
October 31, 2025 at 11:16 PM
I'm no expert on human psychology, but I fear that the type of young man who acts on this "advice" will become a serial killer after crossing maybe three state lines. The waitresses he hassles in the first few states truly are the fortunate ones.
My better half has ended up (yeah, we're in our 50s; fuck off) needing one pair of glasses for computer work and another pair for everything else in her life. You could go with bifocals but bifocals are a pain in the ass.
October 30, 2025 at 6:44 PM
My better half has ended up (yeah, we're in our 50s; fuck off) needing one pair of glasses for computer work and another pair for everything else in her life. You could go with bifocals but bifocals are a pain in the ass.
Last time he read an entire book: give me a guess
October 25, 2025 at 12:18 AM
Last time he read an entire book: give me a guess
I can visualize the corresponding and unnervingly continuous hand gesticulations
October 24, 2025 at 5:22 PM
I can visualize the corresponding and unnervingly continuous hand gesticulations
What if we took a group of people you sit furthest away from at a sports bar and put them on tv? Will that get you to tune in?
October 24, 2025 at 3:10 PM
What if we took a group of people you sit furthest away from at a sports bar and put them on tv? Will that get you to tune in?
Some dragons like hard coaching.
October 24, 2025 at 4:15 AM
Some dragons like hard coaching.
I’m sorry for my ignorance: does air conditioning men have a specific meaning? Lifelong learner over here thanks
October 22, 2025 at 3:45 AM
I’m sorry for my ignorance: does air conditioning men have a specific meaning? Lifelong learner over here thanks