Follow @wario64.bsky.social and repost for a chance to win 1 of 4 codes for Tomb Raider Definitive Edition for Nintendo Switch 2 (NA eShop Code) courtesy of @aspyr.com. Giveaway closes on Nov 21st, 6 PM PT.

Game is out now on Nintendo Switch & Switch 2 (no upgrade paths)

Unfortunately, all the people I vowed to prove wrong by succeeding have stopped paying attention to me.

‼️ HYPE HIM UP ‼️

(listening to my body)

What's that, body? An entire wedge of blue cheese? Are you sure?

We could use a guy like you on Loser Squad

How come the dentist never takes any blame for what's wrong with your teeth? He's the fucking dentist!

People are afraid of getting older, I'm afraid of not getting older. I'm trying to get as old as possible.

Doing a 10k tomorrow, for you Americans that's 10,000 miles

When a beautiful woman gives me the time of day I'm like shit, I'm late

As American as apple pie. 😳

Where should we meet up? A rendezvous point they'll never suspect. Where do cool people go?

Just saw your text from last night. Are you still defusing the bomb

Coming home from work with my pants slung over my shoulder like a suit jacket

Me, sorting space photos: Intergalactic, planetary, planetary, intergalactic

When I said "wow, you're killing it on your first day" I meant my desire to continue leading this team

no one talks about the emotional weight of finishing a chapstick. like what now. what happens to us. 💔