I can only think that I'm being as charitable to him as he is to me when I think what my sister said was bullshit.

I talk to my sister on Monday about my dad hiding his new marriage from me, she tells me that he doesn't want to hurt our relationship. Today, he goes no contact over a stupid fucking sarcastic joke.

I'm the only one whose able to express my emotions without it turning into a shouting match or a sulky-angry text fight. I'm the only one who goes out of my way to apologize when I do wrong, even when I'm pissed at the other person for other reasons.

"Just one last thing... can I offer you a free tasting of this fine Apple Schnapps?"

Columbo's pizza tab has gotten out of hand...

bro looks like a hotdog thats only been cooked on one side.