I started my dream job working with animals this week, and I'm having the time of my life. Even if being in a medical profession means that I'm around catty bitches 90% of the time, I'm content knowing that my patients get better care because of my input.

The deeper stuff, like being easily startled 100% of the time or my fawn response, is still a work in progress for sure. I don't know if I'll ever recover from the stuff that caused that. But I removed myself from the environment that necessitated it, and that's step 1.

...up until that point, I didn't have the ability to confront just how irrational those phobias are. Now, after a decade of therapy, I can semi-comfortably hold small mammals and exotics. I'm not scared of dogs when they're loud. I understand that they're just as nervous as I am.

...they belonged outside and the best I could do was avoid the outdoors. Now I don't flinch when flying insects hang out near me, and I'm working on respecting wasps/hornets and their space. At my last job, I held a reptile AND a hamster for the first time in my whole life. It sounds bad, but...

...years that I've been able to confront these stupid and irrational barriers in my brain. I used to physically run every time I saw a bee/wasp/hornet/other striped friend. It made spring my least favorite season because I knew, as much as I was afraid of them...

My dad: don't manipulate me with your crying, you'll quit being a vet tech too
Me: I don't even want your approval anymore I just want to do everything I can to get this education and then destroy any and all connection to you I have
My dad: I love you and I'm proud of you
Me: sure jan

I won't be posting her business obviously but let me tell you, the real masculinity crisis is that she thinks any of these chuds deserve the time of day from her.

...you'd think that me saying "Kamala should have won" would be a normal political response that also concedes that sometimes we don't get our way. Not something I get a wellness check called on me for 🫡