You hate horror and yet you work in politics? Forever an enigma, Mr. Nellis.

What money, Mike? 🤣 My hens stopped laying and our ducks got wiped out by a predator. We're talking about butchering one of the male goats.
I kind of wish I had the discipline to milk our doe regularly. I could make a killing selling raw goat milk to the antiscience crowd.

I assure you, dear leaders, I could certainly do a much better job at properly grooming the children if I had more time. I hope this message finds you well and on time. I have no intention of resigning my position.

I do regret that I did not accomplish more, but it was a short week. We were off Monday for a soon to be extinct Federal holiday, had late starts due to weather on three other days, and were home for the weather on Thursday. This only left me 14.5 hours with my students.

Personally recited the pre-1954 version, as I have every school day since I was 12 years old and learned when and why "under god" was added.

5. Reminded coworkers that although our students are 5-6 years old and unlikely to be truly conscientiously objecting to reciting the pledge of allegiance it is still not our place to challenge them if they resist standing and/or reciting it.

4. Correctly gendered the substitute speech assistant, in possible violation of state law. Called multiple students by nicknames not officially approved in writing by parents/guardians in clear and direct violation of state law.

Kindergarteners also enjoy a good "yuck", so we dove into my own personal dairy goats and how we sanitize the milking area, but still pasteurize their milk before use because goats are stinky yucky ewwww.

(5/?)

Spoke solely of positives, including the positives of sugar for quick energy. Kindergarteners learned the new vocabulary word, pasteurized. Briefly discussed the process and how wonderful it is that we can be protected from the risks of raw milk! (4/?)

2. Answered the question "what is all that writing on the milk carton." I'm always up for an impromptu lunchtime nutrition lesson! Discussed vitamins, minerals, and what function each listing on the nutrition label helps our body do. (3/?)

1. Scolded a lunch table full of students for discussing a classmate's body (specifically his fingers, or lack of the standard 10). Unlike the current Federal administration we, the well mannered citizens, do not comment on others' bodies.

(2/?)