Oooo 💕

Amanda perpetually showcased one of those blind spots to reality that only white people of a certain tax bracket can maintain. And she very famously talked about splitting off to Germany and doing sex work to pay rent but like… her family owned nice houses in Boston. She had a net, be for real.

Feminism, solidarity and fighting the patriarchy mattered right up until you were inconvenienced and needing a babysitter. 20 year old me would be crushed and devastated. 37 year old me just wished you'd grown the fuck up at some point. Oasis, MWWSYN... they all ring so hollow now.

Fuck AFP. Done.

handed a vulnerable young woman to a man she knew was predatory (which Lance Horne had the nerve to call 'naive' instead of what it was, horrifically irresponsible and tantamount to collaboration, fuck him too)?

I can't stop thinking about every song she did about SA.

Fuck you, Amanda Palmer. 🧵

she had to at least be doing something beneficial in her own way for the survivors.

After reading the way she spoke to SP, the way she acknowledged "fourteen other women" and dismissed the real tangible needs of a survivor in favor of yet again, White Art Lady Mysticism, after hearing how she 🧵

I was willing to give her grace because I don't think it's right to hold a woman accountable for a man's monstrous behavior. I assumed, with good intentions and the memory of that musician who made me feel loved and understood, that she was doing something good behind the scenes, surely? I thought 🧵

As we say in the south, said all that to say this - I was willing to give grace to her passivity regarding NG's horrific sexual violence because, well, they have a child together, and working in SA response, I know how messy the legal entanglements can get with custody in regards to social media. 🧵

mealy-mouthed response to marginalized suffering had been in her playbook for a while, so it was a reminder that people remain a work in progress. I unfollowed her again after years of on-again off-again eyes on her self-documentation. Once again, the woman who helped me through let me down. 🧵

Then... Gaza. She refused to take a hardline stance against genocide, entertained vicious zion*sm in her comments, and called for a 'both sides' sort of civility in a moment that did not fucking call for it. I wish I could say I was surprised, but I was disappointed for sure. A mamby-pamby sort of 🧵

plane to "The Ride" omw to and from my father's death. That album helped get me through. I fell back in, assuming mother Amanda was older, wiser and maybe a bit more understanding of the dynamics at play socially. She rode hard for BLM, said all the right things on socials. It felt good. 🧵

Years later, she dropped There Will Be No Intermission, an album largely focusing on death and mortality - at roughly this same time, I was called from Columbus OH back to FL to caretake my estranged father on his deathbed. It was exactly what I needed at the exact time I needed it. I cried on the 🧵

Remembering what it had felt like in the mid aughts to have music I could scream along to about r*pe and ab*rtion felt so good, so cathartic, that I did remember why I fell in love in the first place, even with my misgivings. I started with benefit of the doubt again, unsure but hopeful. 🧵

the exact same Daughter of a Wealthy White Family shit - clearly, this was someone who had no idea what it meant to have no one to ask and nowhere to go. It seemed naive and oversimplified and tone deaf, and I assumed she'd learned nothing and moved on, starting to dabble at revisiting her music. 🧵

Then, The Art of Asking came out after Amanda's then record-setting Kickstarter. I was intrigued and truly, nobody was more qualified to talk about living a crowdfunded life than her, so I picked it up years after my love affair with her solo efforts had ended. It was lovely but suffered from 🧵

I couldn't ignore the blind spot and the refusal to engage in any meaningful dialogue about ableism or racism in her music, so I bowed out. I quietly thanked my lucky stars I'd been too poor for that AFP tattoo I'd been planning, took her off my rotation, and that was it for a while. 🧵