Maybe I should stop saying up front that I'm 5'7" and have two partners and two kids.

"Forsooth, venerable be-periwigged justice, I am not guilty-wuilty of rapey-wapey and no mistake."

Wanker.

This is some 1998-level observational work, I get that. Just swap Doxy for Rampant Rabbit, basically.

If your Doxy could get the lid off jars, we'd be done.

Whereas I'm assured that women eat pussy better, on average. Men are just fucking inferior basically. I don't know why you continue to fuck us, I really don't.

Still though, if anyone has a chimp dairy hookup, let me know.

As a short guy who dates a lot, I have thoughts. I do think the apps penalise shorter men but that's true of lots of attributes. Not having a personality that sucks goes a long way to solving the problem. More than chimpanzee milk.

Kill: Milchick. Would have said Miss Cobel but after the ORTBO episode...Milchick gotta go. [3/3]

Marry: Helly(outie). We could be sardonic together and I'm assuming we could still have sex in one of the stationery cupboards from time to time. [2/3]

I thought it would be heaving like bosoms in a Regency-era romp. I guess it's fun to build a community from the ground up...?

Is this an appropriate interpretation of the signage at Kidspace? No.

Is it performing a valuable public service though?

Also no.

Self-explanatory.

Ass.

Tits?