Pitchbot Reply Guy
@pitchbotturd02.bsky.social
Parody. Fan of the NyTimes Pitchbot.
OPINION | Eliminate the fact-checkers at CBS to own the libs.
November 12, 2025 at 3:36 AM
OPINION | Eliminate the fact-checkers at CBS to own the libs.
I’d like to congratulate my friend Elon Musk, who I do not support, on becoming the world’s first trillionaire.
by Glenn Greenwald
by Glenn Greenwald
November 12, 2025 at 3:35 AM
I’d like to congratulate my friend Elon Musk, who I do not support, on becoming the world’s first trillionaire.
by Glenn Greenwald
by Glenn Greenwald
OPINION | The borking of Charles Schumer is an unfortunate display of all the ugly traits Americans hate about Democrats.
November 12, 2025 at 3:34 AM
OPINION | The borking of Charles Schumer is an unfortunate display of all the ugly traits Americans hate about Democrats.
Regardless of what you may think of my friend Tucker Carlson, who I do not support, many Americans find his story of an attack by an interdimensional demonic spiritual force to be both powerful and convincing.
by Glenn Greenwald
by Glenn Greenwald
November 12, 2025 at 3:32 AM
Regardless of what you may think of my friend Tucker Carlson, who I do not support, many Americans find his story of an attack by an interdimensional demonic spiritual force to be both powerful and convincing.
by Glenn Greenwald
by Glenn Greenwald
Fresh off a 40-day government shutdown, many voters are asking if the Democrat Party has moved too far to the left.
November 12, 2025 at 3:28 AM
Fresh off a 40-day government shutdown, many voters are asking if the Democrat Party has moved too far to the left.
Scott McCaughey!
November 12, 2025 at 1:41 AM
Scott McCaughey!
Is the cure to male loneliness caving to Senate Republicans?
November 11, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Is the cure to male loneliness caving to Senate Republicans?
Fired up! Ready to fold!
November 11, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Fired up! Ready to fold!
The best way to win in texas hold 'em? Fold immediately.
November 10, 2025 at 5:17 PM
The best way to win in texas hold 'em? Fold immediately.
Trump can’t read my P-P-P-Poker Face.
by Chuck Schumer
by Chuck Schumer
November 10, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Trump can’t read my P-P-P-Poker Face.
by Chuck Schumer
by Chuck Schumer
Chuck
There's no reason why senate democrats (who are really just angels with dirty faces) didn't carry out this shutdown to the bitter end. I mean, at least wait til the political sum is 41. But then again maybe we're all to blame. Welcome to hell, liberals!
by Maureen Dowd
There's no reason why senate democrats (who are really just angels with dirty faces) didn't carry out this shutdown to the bitter end. I mean, at least wait til the political sum is 41. But then again maybe we're all to blame. Welcome to hell, liberals!
by Maureen Dowd
November 10, 2025 at 4:01 PM
Chuck
There's no reason why senate democrats (who are really just angels with dirty faces) didn't carry out this shutdown to the bitter end. I mean, at least wait til the political sum is 41. But then again maybe we're all to blame. Welcome to hell, liberals!
by Maureen Dowd
There's no reason why senate democrats (who are really just angels with dirty faces) didn't carry out this shutdown to the bitter end. I mean, at least wait til the political sum is 41. But then again maybe we're all to blame. Welcome to hell, liberals!
by Maureen Dowd
The democratic election wins on Tuesday were too big.
by Senate Democrats
by Senate Democrats
November 10, 2025 at 3:27 PM
The democratic election wins on Tuesday were too big.
by Senate Democrats
by Senate Democrats
The big winner of the government shutdown? Florida Governor Ron DeSantis.
November 10, 2025 at 3:22 PM
The big winner of the government shutdown? Florida Governor Ron DeSantis.
Whether it is Tucker Carlson retelling a story about a demon attacking him, or Candace Owens sharing allegedly fake text messages showing Charlie Kirk attacking Ben Shapiro, the new media has eclipsed the journalistic ethics & credibility of the legacy media.
November 10, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Whether it is Tucker Carlson retelling a story about a demon attacking him, or Candace Owens sharing allegedly fake text messages showing Charlie Kirk attacking Ben Shapiro, the new media has eclipsed the journalistic ethics & credibility of the legacy media.
Ben Shapiro should run for president in 2028. As a democrat.
November 10, 2025 at 2:56 PM
Ben Shapiro should run for president in 2028. As a democrat.
Shutdown Volume II
We were all set to tack it up, tack it up, government gonna shut you down. But don’t worry baby, now that all the fun, fun, fun is over, federal employees will finally feel the warmth of the sun again. Oh, why do fools fall in love with government shutdowns?
By Maureen Dowd
We were all set to tack it up, tack it up, government gonna shut you down. But don’t worry baby, now that all the fun, fun, fun is over, federal employees will finally feel the warmth of the sun again. Oh, why do fools fall in love with government shutdowns?
By Maureen Dowd
November 10, 2025 at 2:49 PM
Shutdown Volume II
We were all set to tack it up, tack it up, government gonna shut you down. But don’t worry baby, now that all the fun, fun, fun is over, federal employees will finally feel the warmth of the sun again. Oh, why do fools fall in love with government shutdowns?
By Maureen Dowd
We were all set to tack it up, tack it up, government gonna shut you down. But don’t worry baby, now that all the fun, fun, fun is over, federal employees will finally feel the warmth of the sun again. Oh, why do fools fall in love with government shutdowns?
By Maureen Dowd
Many are saying it was the greatest capitulation since Benedict Arnold.
November 10, 2025 at 2:45 PM
Many are saying it was the greatest capitulation since Benedict Arnold.
It’s high time to end this shutdown so President Trump can get back to his key priorities –invading Greenland, bulldozing the White House, securing a Nobel Peace Prize, and peddling crypto & Teslas from the White House.
November 10, 2025 at 12:58 AM
It’s high time to end this shutdown so President Trump can get back to his key priorities –invading Greenland, bulldozing the White House, securing a Nobel Peace Prize, and peddling crypto & Teslas from the White House.
Bulldoze the White House, cancel SNAP, and raise everyone’s health insurance premiums to own the libs.
November 10, 2025 at 12:57 AM
Bulldoze the White House, cancel SNAP, and raise everyone’s health insurance premiums to own the libs.
Put the ACA subsidies on the blockchain.
by Andrew Yang
by Andrew Yang
November 10, 2025 at 12:51 AM
Put the ACA subsidies on the blockchain.
by Andrew Yang
by Andrew Yang
The Democrats need a bigger tent to include more pro-life and anti-gay candidates. But Zohan Mamdani's free bus program is simply a bridge too far.
November 10, 2025 at 12:38 AM
The Democrats need a bigger tent to include more pro-life and anti-gay candidates. But Zohan Mamdani's free bus program is simply a bridge too far.
I was a lifelong liberal democrat. But then the democrat party opposed naming the Commander’s stadium after Trump.
November 10, 2025 at 12:29 AM
I was a lifelong liberal democrat. But then the democrat party opposed naming the Commander’s stadium after Trump.
Opinion | Was DOGE the most successful government program in history?
November 9, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Opinion | Was DOGE the most successful government program in history?
Mint new trillionaires to own the libs.
November 9, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Mint new trillionaires to own the libs.
Why are federal employees overwhelming food banks with long lines? Because they are too woke.
November 9, 2025 at 4:14 PM
Why are federal employees overwhelming food banks with long lines? Because they are too woke.