Patrick Crerand
@patrickcrerand.bsky.social
“Built for comfort, not for speed.” Writer, teacher, Director of DeSales MFA Program. Not the Man Utd player, but I wrote about our shared name here: https://xn--wgiaa.ws/3-united-a-story-by-patrick-crerand-x-on-x
But think of the necklaces, Dave! The necklaces!
September 15, 2025 at 2:26 PM
But think of the necklaces, Dave! The necklaces!
We’ve entered Late Stage Fudruckerization.
September 6, 2025 at 12:56 PM
We’ve entered Late Stage Fudruckerization.
His head looks like a jiffy pop if you lost power halfway through cooking it.
August 28, 2025 at 2:15 PM
His head looks like a jiffy pop if you lost power halfway through cooking it.
He said “Fidelio” twice.
July 18, 2025 at 12:39 AM
He said “Fidelio” twice.
One of Digital Day’s storylines is he needs max booster bonus bux to keep his beard from going grey. If he doesn’t get enough in time, a magic NCAA inspector comes down from Indy and turns him into Urban Meyer. Same for Holtz but it’s all Chivas Regal based incentives.
May 29, 2025 at 2:52 PM
One of Digital Day’s storylines is he needs max booster bonus bux to keep his beard from going grey. If he doesn’t get enough in time, a magic NCAA inspector comes down from Indy and turns him into Urban Meyer. Same for Holtz but it’s all Chivas Regal based incentives.
Feels like a paper where its style guide contains an allowance for no more than two “yous” per column.
May 23, 2025 at 6:37 PM
Feels like a paper where its style guide contains an allowance for no more than two “yous” per column.
Yellow Spudmarine
May 20, 2025 at 11:40 AM
Yellow Spudmarine
He ate all the paste in school.
April 3, 2025 at 12:48 AM
He ate all the paste in school.
What could go wrong?
April 1, 2025 at 7:01 PM
What could go wrong?
Looking forward to the new book! Would it be possible to contact you about an opportunity to speak with my MFA students who'll be in Scotland in July? Let me know and thanks.
April 1, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Looking forward to the new book! Would it be possible to contact you about an opportunity to speak with my MFA students who'll be in Scotland in July? Let me know and thanks.
Better than the Liver King.
March 29, 2025 at 5:41 PM
Better than the Liver King.
It’s literally Robert E. Lee’s land seized during that war for his treason.
March 14, 2025 at 6:19 PM
It’s literally Robert E. Lee’s land seized during that war for his treason.
End of your glasses in your mouth as well?
February 26, 2025 at 4:36 AM
End of your glasses in your mouth as well?
Did that asteroid rent a billboard?
February 20, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Did that asteroid rent a billboard?
Now that we’ve elected McTeague to our highest office, I’m here for all the whale news and wondering when the leviathan will swallow us. It can’t come too soon now!
February 14, 2025 at 12:42 PM
Now that we’ve elected McTeague to our highest office, I’m here for all the whale news and wondering when the leviathan will swallow us. It can’t come too soon now!
A good one from Louis Jenkins. www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/53694/...
Football
This isn't a football, it's a shoe, a man's brown leather oxford. I have eaten pancakes, for instance, with that clear corn syrup on them because there was no maple syrup and they weren't very good.
www.poetryfoundation.org
February 9, 2025 at 10:39 PM
A good one from Louis Jenkins. www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/53694/...