J.S.
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past-tense.bsky.social
J.S.
@past-tense.bsky.social
46 followers 150 following 290 posts
fucking beauty queen blowing chunks everywhere
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past-tense.bsky.social
Bush getting whisperer into his ear meme template with the phrase “Sir, there’s a second Joyce Carol Oates Tweet”
November 11, 2025 at 3:32 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Still photo from the end of The Shining. The one with all the people dressed up in a ballroom with Jack Torrence in the center dated 1921.
October 22, 2025 at 2:55 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Cook a meal for their families, you say?
Octavia Spencer from the movie The Help. Her character has on a fancy hat and is holding a hand fan in white gloved hands. She is also holding a homemade pie in one hand, a pie made with human poop in it.
October 20, 2025 at 9:39 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
This not my pee!!!?!!
Scene from Rock N Roll High School where 3 dimwits pretend to drink their own urine to clown the folks doing a drug test.
October 19, 2025 at 9:14 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
This not my pee
Still from Rock’n’Roll High School of three idiots forced to take a drug test, having swapped their collection cups and are now gargling the liquid within
September 10, 2025 at 12:56 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
18,000 waters
18,000 waters
18,000 waters
18,000 waters
Tim Robinson in a drive thru from an episode of his show
August 30, 2025 at 1:32 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Andy Samberg from Brooklyn 99(?) saying Smort!
August 19, 2025 at 2:01 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Screenshot of the one day stock price of Starbucks showing it down 1.34 points or -1.49% to $88.86
August 6, 2025 at 7:57 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Kenan Thompson on SNL in a sketch wearing a thin mustache and bowtie in a parody of a Sunday Political Show saying,”Ain’t nothing gon’ happen”
August 4, 2025 at 9:15 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
July 24, 2025 at 9:05 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Me, walking into my gay friends apartment without knocking:
A cursed product from Hostess, DingDongs x Twinkies. Labeled as a Mashup.
July 22, 2025 at 9:48 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
See, we can still have nice things.
Key Visual poster for Pokemon Concierge. New episodes coming September 4th on Netflix. Stop Motion art of the Concierge standing up on a paddleboat with her companion Psyduck next to a mostly submerged Walrein, all looking up to the camera that is shooting them from above.
July 22, 2025 at 2:05 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
As a fellow shorty, 11 foot lightbulb grabby has made my life better.
Product page for a pole with several different attachment example of a grabby stick for different lightbulb types, traditional lightbulb, compact lightbulbs, outdoor flared lightbulb, and a widget for removing safely broken bulbs.
July 8, 2025 at 3:36 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Oh! Huh.
Poster for Sanrio based anime My Melody & Kuromi. Only on Netflix July 24.
June 12, 2025 at 12:24 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Yotsuba & is the best manga on the planet because it’s the only one that captures the joy of a small child going to a western style buffet for the first time:
A page from chapter 97 of manga Yotsuba &: Panel 1: Yotsuba is looking at a pan only partially full. Yotsuba asks the lady next to her, “What is this big square thing?” The lady responses,”It’s custard pudding.” Panel 2: Different angle of Yotsuba looking at the pan. Yotsuba’s eye are big and sparkling. “All of this is pudding,”she exclaims. Panel 3: Pan out so you can see some more of the table spread and the lower half of the lady. She is spooning some of the pudding onto her empty plate. Yotsuba is in frame, eyes in shock. The lady says,”Yes. You take the spoon and scoop out as much as you want.” Yotsuba has a speech bubble that is just an exclamation point. She says,”Oh, I see” Panel 4: Yotsuba is contemplating the square pan of pudding. She says,”I have to come back for this…but it all might be gone soon…” Panel 5: What is this? A Chef brings a new, full pan of pudding at sets it down next to the partially empty pan of pudding. Panel 6: Yotsuba in profile looking at the new pan of pudding. “A brand new pudding…!”
June 6, 2025 at 3:48 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Having a normal one
Score from a current baseball game between the Washington Nationals versus the Arizona Diamondbacks where improbably the Nats have scored 10 runs in the 1st inning.
June 1, 2025 at 2:51 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
May 14, 2025 at 2:16 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Funny how GKids announces a new edition of Graveyard of the Fireflies (which has been out of print and unavailable for over a decade now) and now all the physical media vultures are scrambling to offload overpriced steelbooks before the market for them collapses.
Screenshot from Mercardi, a reselling site, of various anime steelbooks almost half of which are long ago out of print copies of Graveyard of the Fireflies, the most depressing of the Studio Ghibli movies. Prices range from $400 to $750.
April 30, 2025 at 11:37 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Canada too has the dumbest fucking people on the planet. Business-minded, fuck off.
Screen of part of an article from the AP. Text: Laiqa, a 27-year-old health care worker, voted for the New Democratic Party. Mahira, 25, who works at a bank, supported the Conservative Party. The sisters, who immigrated from Pakistan a decade ago, say the economy has worsened and job opportunities have dried up under Liberal rule. “It was different when we arrived,” Laiqa Shoaib says. “We need to get out of Liberals.” Mahira Shoaib says Poilievre is the best candidate to improve the country’s financial picture. “He is business-minded, and that’s what we need right now,” she said.
April 29, 2025 at 2:00 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Living in Japan while seeing other Americans enjoying Sinners
Spongbob meme of Squidward looking out a window through open blinds seeing Spongebob and Patrick enjoying themselves
April 28, 2025 at 10:55 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Applin is peak Pokemon design, they went hard with this one.
Screenshot from Pokemon Go of a new pokemon called Applin with 449 CP. Applin is a grass/dragon type and looks like a red apple with a tan bottom, with two green stalks from the core that are also eyes.
April 28, 2025 at 1:28 AM
past-tense.bsky.social
Gonna be like this my entire life, huh?
Screenshot from satirical newspaper The Onion with the Headline: De Blasio: ‘Well, Well, Well, Not So Easy To Find A Mayor That Doesn’t Suck Shit, Huh?’
April 24, 2025 at 3:42 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Apropo of nothing, but Bezos sold off $5 billion of Amazon stock since middle of last year. Old boy knew and cashed out.
Amazon stock price year to date from April 3rd, 2024 to April 3rd 2025. Generally modest downward trending curve until you get to April 2025 when it takes are sharp nosedive. Stock trading at $179.27 down $40.95 (-18.60%)
April 3, 2025 at 6:40 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
Screenshot of The Onion article titled Marilyn Mason Now Going Door-to-Door Trying to Shock People
March 27, 2025 at 10:07 PM
past-tense.bsky.social
I like the implication that consuming soup is fine as long as it isn’t in public, that soup must only be consumed in a shame cave least it provoke a feminine response. Drinking soup under a cloth as if to hide that sin from god.
March 21, 2025 at 10:49 PM