Orcish Law
LightNews LightNews
banner
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Orcish Law
@orcishlaw.bsky.social
2.5K followers 520 following 8.8K posts
Lawyer. Gamer. Lawyer who represents game developers. Former musical theatre performer. He/him. Profile pic by @lartist. Black Lives still Matter. Fight fascists. Protect trans kids.
Posts Replies Media Videos
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Update.
Another overhead picture of a small white dog lying on my lap, trapping me on the couch. She has now shifted to lay on top of my left leg, with her head resting on my knee.
November 23, 2025 at 10:32 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
I regret* to inform you that my careful plans to be productive today have been overruled. My new job for the foreseeable future is Couch.

*I regret nothing.
An overhead picture of the bottom half of a white man sitting on a couch. A small white dog with apricot ears lays perpendicular across his lap, snoozing as if her life depends on it.
November 23, 2025 at 9:08 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
We're having a much-needed bout of weather in Phoenix right now, but it's manifesting in a lot of microbursts. Last night we got sudden-onset hail that was so loud I couldn't hear another person talking in the same room.

Here's some video of me concerned my skylight would shatter.
November 20, 2025 at 8:09 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
After this scene, Sephiroth was named the new White House Communications Director, but he was fired a few days later because his long hair was deemed too woke.
A screenshot from Final Fantasy 7: Rebirth. Aerith lays in Cloud's arms, looking sleepy, while Cloud holds her and cries, probably from allergies. In the foreground, a photoshopped Trump stares blankly offscreen, probably wondering when there'll be another beauty contest subplot.
November 8, 2025 at 8:43 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Thanks to tariffs, if you want to love Tony 3000, it'll actually cost you 5500 these days.
A screenshot from the movie Avengers: Endgame. Iron Man looks very beat up, but has the infinity stones in his glove and is about to snap his fingers. In the foreground, a photoshopped Trump stares dully offscreen at a cheap applique fixture painted with gold spraypaint.
November 8, 2025 at 8:43 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
I also reference video games!
A screenshot from the Telltale Game The Walking Dead. Clementine, a ~10 year old girl, is holding a pistol aimed offscreen. Her eyes are squeezed almost shut with tears, and her face is spattered with blood. She's definitely not going to be traumatized by what she's about to do, and neither is the audience. In the foreground, a photoshopped Trump stares blankly forward. Clem will remember this, but he probably won't.
November 8, 2025 at 8:43 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
I need to compete with Greg's choice of the Swamp of Sadness somehow.
A promo image from the movie Old Yeller (I think from a record album? It was hard to find a good image). The boy is aiming his gun offscreen, definitely not toward something that he or the audience is attached to. His mother and little sister hug each other sadly while the watch. In the foreground, a photoshopped Trump blankly looks in the direction the gun is pointed, thinking about nothing a hamburger he ate in 1987.
November 8, 2025 at 8:43 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
I need to stop doing this now before I end up on some very weird lists...
A screenshot from the movie Independence Day. Dr. Okun, played by the delightful Brent Spiner, is being slammed up against a glass window by an alien tentacle wrapped around his neck. It's not a great look for him. In the foreground, a photoshopped Trump blankly looks away towards something shiny.
November 8, 2025 at 8:43 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
I showed this to my spouse and received this one approximately 2 minutes later. She has many other ideas as well.
A screenshot from Bambi, with the little deer curled up next to the bleeding corpse of his mother. In the foreground, Trump stands looking unconcerned into the middle distance.
November 8, 2025 at 7:14 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Carter Burke has just endorsed Amdrew Cuomo
An image of Paul Reiser's character from Aliens, Carter Burke, the super douchey corpo guy who tries to betray everyone to make more money.
November 4, 2025 at 7:08 AM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Molly definitely didn't learn to stand on her hind legs just so she could steal food from our plates. Definitely.
A small white dog with apricot ears stands on her hind legs next to a wooden dining table. She has one front paw on the table to brace herself, and her head is tall enough to see everything on the table. But you can totally trust her.
November 2, 2025 at 10:03 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Hmm, thighs are mostly clear of *puncture* wounds, but I am covered in fur and scratches from a different fuzzy beast.
A small white dog with apricot ears sits in a pink stuffed chair made for children, on top of a Halloween blanket. She's looking over her shoulder at the camera, confused why you're bothering her while she's lying on her throne.
November 2, 2025 at 9:38 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Important updates in this story: it's all the driver's fault that the cops lied and made a bunch of things up, and also cops can't count to three (It's not 1/6 missing, it's 3/6)
A screenshot from the linked article, which reads: "The driver of the truck told local law enforcement that the monkeys were dangerous and posed a threat to humans," the sheriff's office said. "We took the the appropriate actions after being given that information from the person transporting the monkeys. He also stated that you had wear PPE equipment to handle the monkeys."
October 29, 2025 at 11:09 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
It's amazing that even in a story about monkeys, cops will just lie about important shit.

"The Jasper County Sheriff's Office originally said the monkeys carried hepatitis C, herpes and COVID. Tulane officials stressed that the animals were not diseased or infectious."
A screenshot of text from the reposted story. It reads: The primates in question belong to another entity and are not infectious. We are actively collaborating with local authorities and will send a team of animal care experts to assist as needed," Tulane University said in a statement. Sheriff Randy Johnson said 21 monkeys were on the truck. Six of them escaped. Fifteen remained caged after the crash. "The monkey that got away actually crossed interstate, went out into a wooded area," Johnson told ABC News. The Jasper County Sheriff's Office originally said the monkeys carried hepatitis C, herpes and COVID. Tulane officials stressed that the animals were not diseased or infectious.
October 28, 2025 at 10:40 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Molly has floppy ears, but sometimes they'll stand up and she becomes a bunny rabbit.
A picture of a small white dog laying on her side, mostly asleep. She's wearing a pink sweater and a harness, and laying on a multicolored rug near a brown pillow. Her normally floppy ears are both extended.
October 24, 2025 at 7:43 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults—Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe—living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.
A promo image from the 1990 series of IT. Everyone is looking forward at the camera rather seriously, including the killer clown Pennywise in full clown regalia. No one is reacting to the clown in the middle of the group picture.
October 23, 2025 at 4:18 AM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Good news! One of the guys from Arizona (who the article says called for someone to be raped) not only refuses to resign as chair of the local Young Rep. chapter, but he's also available for you to hire!

This is directly from his Facebook. Look him up for all your "consultanting" needs!
An image from the Facebook page for Luke Mosiman. The description reads: "Owner of Mosiman Consultanting. Chairman Arizona Young Republicans. Lutheran. Politico."
October 17, 2025 at 8:42 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
October 17, 2025 at 3:33 AM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
An image of Ta-Nehisi Coates, sitting at an interview and looking surprised at having just seen something incredibly racist. He then says "Wow, that was really racist. That was really racist!"
October 15, 2025 at 9:58 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
An image of Denise Goff, who (brilliantly) played Agent Dedra Meero in Andor, looking at the phone in her hand with absolute horror at what she sees on the screen
October 7, 2025 at 7:01 AM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Big Hat Logan approves.

Does this make Ghost of Yotei a soulslike?
An image from Dark Souls 1. Big Hat Loan, a man dressed in Wizard robes and an incredibly wide brimmed hat, stands in an opened cage.
October 7, 2025 at 12:04 AM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
An image of the CGI white mouse from the Stuart Little movies, smirking and leaning on his dope red convertible, against a field of blue and white stars. A text box (masterfully inserted into the image) says "Get wrecked, nerd."
October 6, 2025 at 9:02 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
An image that says "Talking like Sephiroth on the internet alert", over a picture of Sephiroth (from the game Final Fantasy 7) surrounded by flames, plus two red light sirens going off.
October 2, 2025 at 5:18 AM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Have you ever considered doing a book cover like the Batman Arkham City cover, except instead of scores, it's variations of "URSULA, WHAT THE FUCK" blurbs from horrified readers?
The xbox 360 cover for Batman: Arkham City, game of the year edition. The title is small, and the image of Batman is in greyscale, so all of the focus is on the many blurbs of scores from various reviewers. It's incredibly busy.
September 30, 2025 at 11:17 PM
orcishlaw.bsky.social
Two stills from an episode of 30 Rock: Jack: " The television audience doesn't want your elitist. East Coast, alternative, intellectual left wing..." Liz: Jack, just say Jewish, this is taking forever."
September 28, 2025 at 2:59 AM