cowboylikeEm
@omi13.bsky.social
I don’t start shit but I can tell you how it ends.
Uber driver is playing Christmas music! Happy Monday, fam!
December 1, 2025 at 11:07 AM
Uber driver is playing Christmas music! Happy Monday, fam!
Peppermint ice cream szn 🎄
December 1, 2025 at 2:04 AM
Peppermint ice cream szn 🎄
I live mixing drugs together to get real high but there’s no high better than the high you get from just mixing wine with a stupid good dinner.
November 29, 2025 at 3:14 AM
I live mixing drugs together to get real high but there’s no high better than the high you get from just mixing wine with a stupid good dinner.
My kid watching the parade: “So when’s the Nathan’s hot dog eating contest?”
We’re all, “Wrong holiday, dude..”
😂
We’re all, “Wrong holiday, dude..”
😂
November 27, 2025 at 2:19 PM
My kid watching the parade: “So when’s the Nathan’s hot dog eating contest?”
We’re all, “Wrong holiday, dude..”
😂
We’re all, “Wrong holiday, dude..”
😂
We did almost all of our Thanksgiving prep today so tomorrow I just have to make some gravy and whipped cream, take some dabs and watch the Lions beat the stupid packers.
November 27, 2025 at 2:31 AM
We did almost all of our Thanksgiving prep today so tomorrow I just have to make some gravy and whipped cream, take some dabs and watch the Lions beat the stupid packers.
Work crush is back on. He put on Ani DuFranco this morning and this guy is just really cool.
November 25, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Work crush is back on. He put on Ani DuFranco this morning and this guy is just really cool.
If you’re ever having a terrible day just watch one of the videos where the deaf babies get a hearing aid and hear their mom’s voice for the first time. It will make everything okay. I promise.
November 24, 2025 at 9:02 PM
If you’re ever having a terrible day just watch one of the videos where the deaf babies get a hearing aid and hear their mom’s voice for the first time. It will make everything okay. I promise.
I just fell asleep so hard that when I woke up I asked my husband what time it was and when he said, “It’s 6!”, I freaked out because I have to be to work at 4 a.m. and I thought I was late. And he’s like, “damn girl, it’s still Sunday.”
November 24, 2025 at 1:15 AM
I just fell asleep so hard that when I woke up I asked my husband what time it was and when he said, “It’s 6!”, I freaked out because I have to be to work at 4 a.m. and I thought I was late. And he’s like, “damn girl, it’s still Sunday.”
This show is made up of dudes who probably call into Tales from the Golden Road all the time.
November 23, 2025 at 5:05 AM
This show is made up of dudes who probably call into Tales from the Golden Road all the time.
I’m going to see a band called Jerry’s Middle Finger tonight! LFG.
November 22, 2025 at 10:53 PM
I’m going to see a band called Jerry’s Middle Finger tonight! LFG.
Did you know that the biscuits have only played HAB twice this year?! What in the fuckin’ fuck? Play HAB, you guys. Jeez.
November 22, 2025 at 4:42 PM
Did you know that the biscuits have only played HAB twice this year?! What in the fuckin’ fuck? Play HAB, you guys. Jeez.
I just found out on IG that Arcteryx jackets are $800 and I blocked them.
November 22, 2025 at 1:24 AM
I just found out on IG that Arcteryx jackets are $800 and I blocked them.
I can’t tell I need to get back on the Peloton because I just got winded bending over to tie my shoes.
November 15, 2025 at 10:57 PM
I can’t tell I need to get back on the Peloton because I just got winded bending over to tie my shoes.
The couple who ride on the scooters together look like the biggest twats in the universe.
November 15, 2025 at 5:10 PM
The couple who ride on the scooters together look like the biggest twats in the universe.
Play Shelby, you cowards.
November 15, 2025 at 1:48 AM
Play Shelby, you cowards.
For the first time since Kindergarten I get to go to my kid’s Thanksgiving lunch. I’m so excited. Horrible food but the best vibes.
November 14, 2025 at 2:14 PM
For the first time since Kindergarten I get to go to my kid’s Thanksgiving lunch. I’m so excited. Horrible food but the best vibes.
Picasso Moon is such a weird Bobby song. Jesus.
November 11, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Picasso Moon is such a weird Bobby song. Jesus.
November 9, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Our retard President just said he loves the Jets and he loves the Giants.
My husband: “No he doesn’t. That’s fucking IMPOSSIBLE.”
Please get this trash off of my football game. He’s going to jinx the Lions.
My husband: “No he doesn’t. That’s fucking IMPOSSIBLE.”
Please get this trash off of my football game. He’s going to jinx the Lions.
November 9, 2025 at 11:24 PM
Our retard President just said he loves the Jets and he loves the Giants.
My husband: “No he doesn’t. That’s fucking IMPOSSIBLE.”
Please get this trash off of my football game. He’s going to jinx the Lions.
My husband: “No he doesn’t. That’s fucking IMPOSSIBLE.”
Please get this trash off of my football game. He’s going to jinx the Lions.
Him “Wait, Falling 303?! Is that a song?”
Me: “Oh honey, you’ve been away for so long.”
Me: “Oh honey, you’ve been away for so long.”
November 8, 2025 at 2:45 PM
Him “Wait, Falling 303?! Is that a song?”
Me: “Oh honey, you’ve been away for so long.”
Me: “Oh honey, you’ve been away for so long.”
I’m making Taiwanese beef noodle soup tonight and I can’t even with the smells in my home right now.
November 4, 2025 at 9:28 PM
I’m making Taiwanese beef noodle soup tonight and I can’t even with the smells in my home right now.
More like digital butthole.
November 4, 2025 at 6:51 PM
More like digital butthole.
Crazy that Dick Cheney and the disco biscuits died the same week.
November 4, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Crazy that Dick Cheney and the disco biscuits died the same week.
Crazy that the disco biscuits and Donna Jean died in the same week.
November 4, 2025 at 12:38 AM
Crazy that the disco biscuits and Donna Jean died in the same week.