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newton-meter.bsky.social
Newton meter
@newton-meter.bsky.social
400 followers 930 following 1.1K posts
He/him. Implements programming languages. Rides anything on two wheels. Multi-instrumentalist. Listens to music from 1978. Xoogler.
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newton-meter.bsky.social
A great song lyric is from Dylan’s “Stuck Inside of Mobile with the Memphis Blues Again”:

“Your debutante just knows what you need, but I know what you want”.

I thought of that the other day.
The shelf at Morrison’s supermarket loaded with sixpacks of baked beans labeled “not a want but a need”.
October 30, 2025 at 9:55 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
WhatsApp message: Them: Do they do take out? Me: Nah, it’s a very fancy tapas style place
October 27, 2025 at 6:45 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Are you talking about these goofballs?
An apricot standard poodle and a one-eyed black and white cat, snuggling together on the sofa.
September 27, 2025 at 12:08 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Sliced leeks and celery in a pot, sautéing in butter. The leeks and celery, coming to a simmer with some chicken stock. A hand blender, ready to blend!
September 7, 2025 at 6:54 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
There are so many great details here, but my favorites are: (a) he bagged it, and (b) though he said he did it to support Home Depot you know he saved the receipt so he could return it as soon as the camera was off.
Ben Shapiro virtue signaling by ridiculously holding a board in one hand and a receipt in the other, outside a Home Depot.
September 3, 2025 at 2:50 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
“Hingle McCringleberry” from the classic Key & Peele east west all stars football sketch.
August 28, 2025 at 11:55 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
We’ve entered a new era
A prepackaged Heinz beans and cheese roll. 100% British cheddar!
August 26, 2025 at 9:59 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
This gave me an idea for an airport shop called „Wurst of Hamburg“ that was just sausage.
“Best of Hamburg” souvenir shop in the airport.
August 18, 2025 at 3:03 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
We walked into the Italian restaurant at the Hamburg airport, and I told my wife “it must be good, they use the Jamie Oliver cookbook”. For some reason she just rolled her eyes at me.
Bookshelf display with “Jamie Kocht Italien” German language cookbook.
August 18, 2025 at 2:48 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Walling around Hamburg, I spotted a viral marketing campaign for a ZZ Top tribute band.
Graffiti on a bridge reads ZZZZZZZTOP
August 18, 2025 at 9:17 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
But now we know.
“If a dog wore pants would he wear them like this or like this?” meme.
August 2, 2025 at 9:11 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
These are ready to go to Europe with me.
The three books mentioned, stacked on a wooden desk.
August 1, 2025 at 11:10 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Selfie of a man from the neck down in a Baltimore Orioles home jersey. A half a glass of amber beer and a part of eyeglasses on a wooden bar top.
August 1, 2025 at 10:26 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
You laugh, but it’s no coincidence that the icon for Google authenticator looks like a starfish.
Google authenticator’s icon on iPhone looks uncomfortably like a butthole.
July 31, 2025 at 1:19 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
I had a dog and adopted a cat and then discovered that they were sisters.
A black and white cat and an apricot standard poodle sleeping together on the sofa. A black and white cat and an apricot standard poodle sleeping together on the sofa. A black and white cat and an apricot standard poodle sleeping together on the sofa.
July 29, 2025 at 4:26 AM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Richard Manuel!
A bronze star set into the sidewalk. It is inscribed “Richard Manuel, musician, “The Band”, presented by the city of Stratford, July 1, 2004.
July 16, 2025 at 12:37 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Glenn Gould!
A bronze star in the sidewalk inscribed “Glenn Gould, pianist and Stratford Festival’s music director 1961-1964, presented by the city of Stratford, July 1, 2007.”
July 16, 2025 at 12:35 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Dr Jenny Trout, Canada’s first licensed female physician.
A bronze star set in the sidewalk. Written in it is “Dr Jenny Trout, first Canadian female physician, presented by the city of Stratford, July 1, 2004.”
July 16, 2025 at 12:32 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Agnes Marshall, Canada’s first female MP.
A bronze star in the sidewalk. Written on it is “Agnes Marshall, Canada’s first woman MP, presented by the city of Stratford, July 1, 2013.”
July 16, 2025 at 12:29 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Somebody named “Street Lighting”!
A sidewalk colored utility access plate labeled “street lighting”. A woman’s feet are on the top edge for scale. It must have looked like a bronze star plate from a distance and so it was photographed as a joke.
July 16, 2025 at 12:26 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Captain Kirk!
A bronze star on a square plate set into the sidewalk. Written on it is “William Shatner, actor, presented by the city of Stratford, July first, 2015.” A woman’s feet are on the top edge for scale.
July 16, 2025 at 12:23 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Justin Bieber!
A bronze plate with a star set into the sidewalk. A woman’s feet are covering the star. Presumably she doesn’t like Justin Bieber.
July 16, 2025 at 12:19 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Tom Patterson, the founder of the festival!
A square bronze plate with a star on it. It has written “Tom Patterson, founder, Stratford Festival, presented by the city of Stratford, January 21, 2002.” My wife’s feet are on the top edge for scale.
July 16, 2025 at 12:16 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Obi Wan “Ben” Kenobi!
A square bronze plate with an inscribed star, set into the sidewalk. Written on it is “Sir Alec Guinness, Actor, inaugural season 1953, presented by the city of Stratford, January 21, 2002.
July 16, 2025 at 12:13 PM
newton-meter.bsky.social
Captain von Trapp!
A square plate with a bronze star inlaid in the sidewalk. It’s inscribed “Christopher Plummer, Actor”. My wife’s feet are visible on the top edge for scale.
July 16, 2025 at 12:09 PM