“Is it safe?”

27/ This thread was composed using blueskythreads.xyz

26/ We must honor those who have lost their lives.

25/ On this International AIDS day, we must remember and recommit to caring for each other and carrying on this fight. We must continue to advocate for the folks living with HIV. We must continue to expand access to HIV prevention.

24/ At the same time unspeakably cruel actions threaten all the progress we have made. We cannot go back.

23/ We have the real means to prevent HIV infections if we fight to make it accessible to everyone who needs it. We have good treatments and better ones on the horizon. We understand HIV better than we ever have.

22/ Today I am privileged to be an HIV specialist providing care to many of Jerry’s peers who made it. I’m sad he isn’t here with them but so grateful I can help in some small way. There is so much to be optimistic about in HIV care and prevention these days.

21/ I went on and did a lot of kinds of nursing over the years, including hospice, wound care. Another decade later I went back to school to become a nurse practitioner. Worked in a community health center and soon found myself working with both HIV treatment and prevention.

20/ Jerry died on January 31st, 2000.

I miss him every day. And yet, he has guided me since, just the way he did when he was alive. Four years later I switched careers from IT and went back to school to become a nurse.

19/ We got hospice and due to Jerry’s foresight getting long term care insurance hired a night shift to supplement. I went down to stay. He always said he wanted to make it to 2000 and he did.

18/ Ray died a week later on November 6th, 1999. It was Jerry’s birthday. Very shortly after, Jerry started having more trouble doing things for himself. He fell. He needed help with showers.

17/ There was a hotel there which had a clothing optional pool with music that Jerry liked. We spent Halloween weekend. It felt like he was almost his old self. We hung out in the sun around the pool and had some nice meals.

16/ Ray was HIV + too and his liver was failing. I would come down whenever I could. Physically, Jerry was still able to go to the gym and do things. On one of my trips, Jerry was doing pretty well and we decided to go to the Keys for “Fantasy Fest”.

15/ Jerry never really went back to “normal” after this. He wasn’t safe to drive or be unsupervised anymore. A dear friend of his, Rick came and stayed with him. He was such an incredible friend. Also, his roommate Ray helped as much as he could.

14/ Soon Jerry was able to come home and get radiation for the tumor. What I did not understand or anticipate at the time was that while the radiation could slow the progression of the tumor, it was also neurotoxic, which meant it caused scarring that affected Jerry’s cognition.