Hamfisted Bun Vendor 🔞
@metalollie.bsky.social
AKA Bacon Fingered Bap Tosser (BunsOfHam). Fond of #DoctorWho, Heavy Metal, #StarTrek, Science. Considerably less fond of Donald Trump. I swear a lot. Not sorry! #Shitgibbon
Pinned
Trump, much as it pains me to say, did a good thing in the Middle East. Getting the hostages freed and hopefully ending the genocide in Gaza deserves praise. It wouldn’t have happened without his intervention. I won’t even comment on it being a “new biginning”.. Tit!
October 13, 2025 at 12:55 PM
Trump, much as it pains me to say, did a good thing in the Middle East. Getting the hostages freed and hopefully ending the genocide in Gaza deserves praise. It wouldn’t have happened without his intervention. I won’t even comment on it being a “new biginning”.. Tit!
A Trump word salad if there ever was one. I genuinely have no fucking idea WHAT he’s wittering about. Neither, I suspect, does he. Enjoy… #Trump #TrumpIsAnIdiot #TrumpIsOnTheEpsteinList
October 13, 2025 at 12:54 PM
A Trump word salad if there ever was one. I genuinely have no fucking idea WHAT he’s wittering about. Neither, I suspect, does he. Enjoy… #Trump #TrumpIsAnIdiot #TrumpIsOnTheEpsteinList
I have a positively stunning headache today. I feel like someone’s dropped a moose on my head, while simultaneously smacking me in the face with a cast iron skillet full of rancid weasel droppings. How’s your day? Don’t answer.. it’s rhetorical.. I couldn’t give a shit! 😉
October 13, 2025 at 12:53 PM
I have a positively stunning headache today. I feel like someone’s dropped a moose on my head, while simultaneously smacking me in the face with a cast iron skillet full of rancid weasel droppings. How’s your day? Don’t answer.. it’s rhetorical.. I couldn’t give a shit! 😉
Afternoon! Muzzy head today. Feel like it’s stuck in a pelican’s bill and won’t come out. Anyone willing to come and punch a pelican in the face?
July 24, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Afternoon! Muzzy head today. Feel like it’s stuck in a pelican’s bill and won’t come out. Anyone willing to come and punch a pelican in the face?
Devastated.. saw Ozzy with Black Sabbath at Download 2005/Ozzfest. They were utterly electrifying, & Ozzy was one of my metal heroes. Fuck, without Sabbath there would BE no metal.. they were pioneers of the genre with Ozzy as frontman. RIP Legend x 🤘🏼
July 22, 2025 at 6:51 PM
Devastated.. saw Ozzy with Black Sabbath at Download 2005/Ozzfest. They were utterly electrifying, & Ozzy was one of my metal heroes. Fuck, without Sabbath there would BE no metal.. they were pioneers of the genre with Ozzy as frontman. RIP Legend x 🤘🏼
Happy Birthday Mummy Bun! 86 years young today, and ten times the energy that I have! She’s amazing for her age.. she’s an extraordinary mother, and has done so much for me, especially since my stroke.. even if she is slightly daffy, and her Bun’isms are the stuff of legend!
July 13, 2025 at 11:36 AM
Happy Birthday Mummy Bun! 86 years young today, and ten times the energy that I have! She’s amazing for her age.. she’s an extraordinary mother, and has done so much for me, especially since my stroke.. even if she is slightly daffy, and her Bun’isms are the stuff of legend!
My head feels like 15 wildebeest are having a competition to see who is the loudest wildebeest in my skull, while 329 other wildebeest cheer them on in the audience.
I have an unusually large head. And a larger headache.
I have an unusually large head. And a larger headache.
July 12, 2025 at 2:08 PM
My head feels like 15 wildebeest are having a competition to see who is the loudest wildebeest in my skull, while 329 other wildebeest cheer them on in the audience.
I have an unusually large head. And a larger headache.
I have an unusually large head. And a larger headache.
Took a chance on a repeat of a series called Rev that’s being shown on BBC.. ended up downloading & watching all 3 seasons from iPlayer. What a delightful series & very true to life, even the absurd bits. Highly recommend if you’re in the market for some ecclesiastical comedy!
July 10, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Took a chance on a repeat of a series called Rev that’s being shown on BBC.. ended up downloading & watching all 3 seasons from iPlayer. What a delightful series & very true to life, even the absurd bits. Highly recommend if you’re in the market for some ecclesiastical comedy!
Apologies for the distinct lack of tweeting, swearing, and boring you shitless with endless tedious updates about my migraines. It has been an unpleasantly stressful few weeks, with depression kicking my magnificent arse even more than usual. So that’s been a treat indeed..
July 9, 2025 at 11:24 PM
Apologies for the distinct lack of tweeting, swearing, and boring you shitless with endless tedious updates about my migraines. It has been an unpleasantly stressful few weeks, with depression kicking my magnificent arse even more than usual. So that’s been a treat indeed..
My head feels like I have the entire percussion section of the Coldstream Guards rehearsing in my head, meanwhile, there’s a whole bunch of dicks outside with leaf blowers, lawn mowers, hedge trimmers and the Saturn V space rocket. I might have made the last one up.
May 29, 2025 at 2:36 PM
My head feels like I have the entire percussion section of the Coldstream Guards rehearsing in my head, meanwhile, there’s a whole bunch of dicks outside with leaf blowers, lawn mowers, hedge trimmers and the Saturn V space rocket. I might have made the last one up.
Seems appropriate to finish the day off with a nice piece of cheese. Only have a block of Red Leicester, as I forgot it was my birthday when I did the shopping last week, but that’ll do nicely.
May 28, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Seems appropriate to finish the day off with a nice piece of cheese. Only have a block of Red Leicester, as I forgot it was my birthday when I did the shopping last week, but that’ll do nicely.
Not a bad birthday, all things considered.. some lovely cards, some nice pressies, some quality Doctor Who this afternoon, visit from Mum and the youngest Bun Jr. Yeh, all in all, a half decent day. And a bit older with a few more grey hairs and absolutely no additional wisdom!
May 28, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Not a bad birthday, all things considered.. some lovely cards, some nice pressies, some quality Doctor Who this afternoon, visit from Mum and the youngest Bun Jr. Yeh, all in all, a half decent day. And a bit older with a few more grey hairs and absolutely no additional wisdom!
Oh fuck. It’s my birthday in 6 days. I frigging hate birthdays with every bone in my body. But, if anyone wants to send me cake or pie, I wouldn’t say no.
Hi. Ollie’s diabetes here. No cake or pie for Ollie. Send him lovely, healthy kale. He’ll like that.
Hi. Ollie’s diabetes here. No cake or pie for Ollie. Send him lovely, healthy kale. He’ll like that.
a close up of a rabbit eating a leaf of lettuce
ALT: a close up of a rabbit eating a leaf of lettuce
media.tenor.com
May 22, 2025 at 8:44 PM
Oh fuck. It’s my birthday in 6 days. I frigging hate birthdays with every bone in my body. But, if anyone wants to send me cake or pie, I wouldn’t say no.
Hi. Ollie’s diabetes here. No cake or pie for Ollie. Send him lovely, healthy kale. He’ll like that.
Hi. Ollie’s diabetes here. No cake or pie for Ollie. Send him lovely, healthy kale. He’ll like that.
Over on the hellsite I’ve unlocked a new achievement. Must have been something I’ve said… 🤔
May 18, 2025 at 3:24 PM
Over on the hellsite I’ve unlocked a new achievement. Must have been something I’ve said… 🤔
Just finished watching Terror of the Zygons, one of my personal favourites and a story that holds up exceptionally well. The Zygons look so much better than their modern counterparts. Cracking story that I haven’t watched in a good while! #DoctorWho
May 18, 2025 at 3:22 PM
Just finished watching Terror of the Zygons, one of my personal favourites and a story that holds up exceptionally well. The Zygons look so much better than their modern counterparts. Cracking story that I haven’t watched in a good while! #DoctorWho
I have a headache, which is highly unusual I know. I feel like I have 26 woodpeckers attempting to bore through to the centre of my brain to see if they can nest. So that’s a treat.
May 18, 2025 at 3:22 PM
I have a headache, which is highly unusual I know. I feel like I have 26 woodpeckers attempting to bore through to the centre of my brain to see if they can nest. So that’s a treat.
Honestly went into this weeks #DoctorWho safe in the knowledge that the episode was going to be bloody awful. Got that well and truly wrong! I absolutely loved it! Freddie Fox was a bit weak as a villain, but Miriam-Teak Lee was utterly phenomenal! And the cameo.. well then!
May 17, 2025 at 12:01 PM
Honestly went into this weeks #DoctorWho safe in the knowledge that the episode was going to be bloody awful. Got that well and truly wrong! I absolutely loved it! Freddie Fox was a bit weak as a villain, but Miriam-Teak Lee was utterly phenomenal! And the cameo.. well then!
New specs! Do I look sexy? No? Alright then.. 🤓 #GorgeousOllie #YeahRightLardass
May 16, 2025 at 8:34 PM
New specs! Do I look sexy? No? Alright then.. 🤓 #GorgeousOllie #YeahRightLardass
Not saying I have a headache, but I feel like I’ve been hit in the face by four albatrosses, a Canadian goose and a Marks and Spencer frozen turkey.
May 14, 2025 at 12:02 PM
Not saying I have a headache, but I feel like I’ve been hit in the face by four albatrosses, a Canadian goose and a Marks and Spencer frozen turkey.
Loved, loved, LOVED this weeks #DoctorWho! So vivid & vibrant, with a rich story & some delightful nods to the past that sent shivers down my spine. And a joy to see “someone” again, even if her timeline confused me even more than I was to begin with! Beautifully woven episode!
May 10, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Loved, loved, LOVED this weeks #DoctorWho! So vivid & vibrant, with a rich story & some delightful nods to the past that sent shivers down my spine. And a joy to see “someone” again, even if her timeline confused me even more than I was to begin with! Beautifully woven episode!
Dear @Bluesky. Please build an iPad app, because trying to use the piddling phone version on my iPad is seriously getting on my norks. Ta muchly!
May 10, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Dear @Bluesky. Please build an iPad app, because trying to use the piddling phone version on my iPad is seriously getting on my norks. Ta muchly!
Coming out of a four day migraine. What a fun four days they have been. Felt like I’ve had an irate moose trying to learn to speak ancient Hebrew in my head. So that’s been fun. Down to moderately fluent Ukrainian speaking Guinea pigs now. So, every cloud..
May 10, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Coming out of a four day migraine. What a fun four days they have been. Felt like I’ve had an irate moose trying to learn to speak ancient Hebrew in my head. So that’s been fun. Down to moderately fluent Ukrainian speaking Guinea pigs now. So, every cloud..
Has been a couple of days of solid migraines, which is been a delight and a half. Fucking stupid brain! And I’ve finally had an eye test, which was long overdue & was delayed further by the bloody stroke and diabetes diagnosis. That’s enough to give me another bloody migraine..🤣
May 3, 2025 at 6:29 PM
Has been a couple of days of solid migraines, which is been a delight and a half. Fucking stupid brain! And I’ve finally had an eye test, which was long overdue & was delayed further by the bloody stroke and diabetes diagnosis. That’s enough to give me another bloody migraine..🤣
Rest in pieces, cracked tooth. For the best part of 50 years you have served me well, chomping at everything from lettuce to steak. Now you reside in a dentist’s bin. A somewhat ignominious end for such a trusty companion. But I am no longer in pain (for now), so farewell.. 🦷
April 23, 2025 at 2:28 PM
Rest in pieces, cracked tooth. For the best part of 50 years you have served me well, chomping at everything from lettuce to steak. Now you reside in a dentist’s bin. A somewhat ignominious end for such a trusty companion. But I am no longer in pain (for now), so farewell.. 🦷