Mel Mackey
@melaniemackey.bsky.social
Standup Comedian and overall nuisance based in Des Moines, IA.
Notice how I blocked someone without writing a creepy manifesto to my followers about why? Very demure, very mindful
April 11, 2025 at 5:40 PM
Notice how I blocked someone without writing a creepy manifesto to my followers about why? Very demure, very mindful
If I never want to have kids can I just add my potential maternity leave to my PTO? Or just take the first day of my period off for the rest of my . menstruating life?
April 7, 2025 at 11:45 AM
If I never want to have kids can I just add my potential maternity leave to my PTO? Or just take the first day of my period off for the rest of my . menstruating life?
Getting triggered and having to operate life normally must be how zombies feel when their guts are falling out but they keep on limpin' forward
April 1, 2025 at 11:56 AM
Getting triggered and having to operate life normally must be how zombies feel when their guts are falling out but they keep on limpin' forward
I have to get to work an hour early in order to get a parking spot. If you only show up 30 min. early you have to park a mile away and I've been told that that walk is not paid. So anyway capitalism is going GREAT.
March 27, 2025 at 11:53 AM
I have to get to work an hour early in order to get a parking spot. If you only show up 30 min. early you have to park a mile away and I've been told that that walk is not paid. So anyway capitalism is going GREAT.
Upcoming Comedy Things!
March 21, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Upcoming Comedy Things!
Hear me out - a song called 'Thoughts and Prayers' to the tune of 'Boats and Hoes'
March 19, 2025 at 11:49 AM
Hear me out - a song called 'Thoughts and Prayers' to the tune of 'Boats and Hoes'
Are these feelings of crippling inadequacy from going off birth control or daylight savings time or a secret third thing?
March 10, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Are these feelings of crippling inadequacy from going off birth control or daylight savings time or a secret third thing?
The new bride urge to challenge all family and friends on basic human rights issues to narrow down the wedding invite list
February 28, 2025 at 12:35 AM
The new bride urge to challenge all family and friends on basic human rights issues to narrow down the wedding invite list
Annnnd we're back.
I hate that I just have to keep switching between "Hey the government is trying to kill me and everyone I love" and "Hey come to my comedy show!💃🏻"
February 28, 2025 at 12:28 AM
Annnnd we're back.
I have now leveled up to switching between "the government is trying to kill me and everyone I love" and "OMG I JUST GOT ENGAGED YAY FOR LOVE"
I hate that I just have to keep switching between "Hey the government is trying to kill me and everyone I love" and "Hey come to my comedy show!💃🏻"
February 25, 2025 at 2:34 PM
I have now leveled up to switching between "the government is trying to kill me and everyone I love" and "OMG I JUST GOT ENGAGED YAY FOR LOVE"
I hate that I just have to keep switching between "Hey the government is trying to kill me and everyone I love" and "Hey come to my comedy show!💃🏻"
February 21, 2025 at 12:38 PM
I hate that I just have to keep switching between "Hey the government is trying to kill me and everyone I love" and "Hey come to my comedy show!💃🏻"
Growing up, I was very much conditioned to understand that I am not (and never was) conventionally attractive. I did the therapy about it long ago, but those feelings of unworthiness are back in full force, yo.
So here's a list of things I like about myself that have nothing to do with my looks
So here's a list of things I like about myself that have nothing to do with my looks
February 18, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Growing up, I was very much conditioned to understand that I am not (and never was) conventionally attractive. I did the therapy about it long ago, but those feelings of unworthiness are back in full force, yo.
So here's a list of things I like about myself that have nothing to do with my looks
So here's a list of things I like about myself that have nothing to do with my looks
Doom spiralling at a bar by myself sipping whiskey. They've got Bob Ross on the TV and it's helping.
February 14, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Doom spiralling at a bar by myself sipping whiskey. They've got Bob Ross on the TV and it's helping.
"Oh cool you're a singer??" - most men who see this photo.
My friend Ian took this dope ass pic of me at my Lonely Hearts Show and I love it 💛
My friend Ian took this dope ass pic of me at my Lonely Hearts Show and I love it 💛
February 11, 2025 at 8:53 PM
"Oh cool you're a singer??" - most men who see this photo.
My friend Ian took this dope ass pic of me at my Lonely Hearts Show and I love it 💛
My friend Ian took this dope ass pic of me at my Lonely Hearts Show and I love it 💛
Going to work hungover and hoping nobody talks to me.
February 10, 2025 at 12:31 PM
Going to work hungover and hoping nobody talks to me.
It's a great day to remind you how to fall on the ice.
Step 1: ARMS UP DONT REACH DOWN
Step 2: THROW THAT ASS IT'S YOUR BEST CUSHION FALL ON IT. EVEN IF YOURE FALLING FORWARD DO A LIL TWIRL AND SQUISH THAT BUTT
Step 3: take a moment to breathe, laugh at yourself, and get up slowly with grace
Step 1: ARMS UP DONT REACH DOWN
Step 2: THROW THAT ASS IT'S YOUR BEST CUSHION FALL ON IT. EVEN IF YOURE FALLING FORWARD DO A LIL TWIRL AND SQUISH THAT BUTT
Step 3: take a moment to breathe, laugh at yourself, and get up slowly with grace
February 5, 2025 at 11:08 PM
It's a great day to remind you how to fall on the ice.
Step 1: ARMS UP DONT REACH DOWN
Step 2: THROW THAT ASS IT'S YOUR BEST CUSHION FALL ON IT. EVEN IF YOURE FALLING FORWARD DO A LIL TWIRL AND SQUISH THAT BUTT
Step 3: take a moment to breathe, laugh at yourself, and get up slowly with grace
Step 1: ARMS UP DONT REACH DOWN
Step 2: THROW THAT ASS IT'S YOUR BEST CUSHION FALL ON IT. EVEN IF YOURE FALLING FORWARD DO A LIL TWIRL AND SQUISH THAT BUTT
Step 3: take a moment to breathe, laugh at yourself, and get up slowly with grace
How many Super Stressed Sighs ™️ should a person make in a day, on average? I'm up to 7 right now.
February 4, 2025 at 5:25 PM
How many Super Stressed Sighs ™️ should a person make in a day, on average? I'm up to 7 right now.
Things to do for Valentine's Day in Des Moines? How about a little comedy show the Sunday beforehand? Maybe a burger and a beer on top of that? Maybe all that lumped into one ticket so you don't gotta think??
February 2, 2025 at 4:44 PM
Things to do for Valentine's Day in Des Moines? How about a little comedy show the Sunday beforehand? Maybe a burger and a beer on top of that? Maybe all that lumped into one ticket so you don't gotta think??
Standup Comedy Open Mic in Ames Iowa Tonight! This mic has been picking up good traction and we always have a lot of fun. Come hang 💃🏻
January 30, 2025 at 2:26 PM
Standup Comedy Open Mic in Ames Iowa Tonight! This mic has been picking up good traction and we always have a lot of fun. Come hang 💃🏻
Hello despite the abundance my seasonal saddies + imposter syndrome have me spiraling. The range on this bitch (I'm this bitch)
January 24, 2025 at 1:22 PM
Hello despite the abundance my seasonal saddies + imposter syndrome have me spiraling. The range on this bitch (I'm this bitch)
Hi hello if you are in or around the dazzling metropolis of Ames, Iowa and if you like open mic comedy, we should hang out tonight 💃🏻
January 23, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Hi hello if you are in or around the dazzling metropolis of Ames, Iowa and if you like open mic comedy, we should hang out tonight 💃🏻
The abundance is FLOWING this week. This is me digitally offering some to you, if you need it 💛
January 22, 2025 at 9:46 PM
The abundance is FLOWING this week. This is me digitally offering some to you, if you need it 💛
Friday Mel got Monday Mel a drawer full of candy and if we're going to accept a shitty inauguration day today, I'm going to be full of sugar about it.
January 20, 2025 at 3:59 PM
Friday Mel got Monday Mel a drawer full of candy and if we're going to accept a shitty inauguration day today, I'm going to be full of sugar about it.
Our normal Wednesday night open mic came back this week 💛
January 17, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Our normal Wednesday night open mic came back this week 💛