max fine Albany | oct 11
@maxfine.bsky.social
“comedian/single mother of three”
My idea of “fuck you money” is like $500
October 22, 2025 at 11:19 PM
My idea of “fuck you money” is like $500
I’m too fucked up to know if this is how I say it
“Can you believe it’s been 3 years since I had a drink”, I say with an empty nitrous balloon in my hand after doing a key bump of ketamine and twiddling a lit joint after a nicotine vape rip.
- a rough paraphrase of a funnier told by @maxfine.bsky.social bit he does lol
- a rough paraphrase of a funnier told by @maxfine.bsky.social bit he does lol
October 11, 2025 at 5:29 AM
I’m too fucked up to know if this is how I say it
I fuckin LOVE Incubus, dude
October 2, 2025 at 5:16 PM
I fuckin LOVE Incubus, dude
The Riyadh Comedy Festival will have been worth it when the crown prince reveals that he is actually The Elephant Graveyard
October 1, 2025 at 4:29 AM
The Riyadh Comedy Festival will have been worth it when the crown prince reveals that he is actually The Elephant Graveyard
Was walking down 14th street and I saw a guy with a Phish shirt. I held up my hand for a high five as we walked by eachother and I said “thank you, Mr. Miner,” to which he gave me a confused look and replied, “wrong guy, my name is John”
September 25, 2025 at 8:13 PM
Was walking down 14th street and I saw a guy with a Phish shirt. I held up my hand for a high five as we walked by eachother and I said “thank you, Mr. Miner,” to which he gave me a confused look and replied, “wrong guy, my name is John”
Maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but instead of boycotting Disney, shouldn’t our elected leaders fucking do literally anything?
September 22, 2025 at 3:38 AM
Maybe this is an unpopular opinion, but instead of boycotting Disney, shouldn’t our elected leaders fucking do literally anything?
I don't mean to brag, but I used to hang with some real garbage people.
September 21, 2025 at 11:01 PM
I don't mean to brag, but I used to hang with some real garbage people.
ATLANTA TONIGHT AT ONWARD THEATRE 8PM
$10
I AM JIMMY KIMMEL
$10
I AM JIMMY KIMMEL
September 18, 2025 at 9:01 PM
ATLANTA TONIGHT AT ONWARD THEATRE 8PM
$10
I AM JIMMY KIMMEL
$10
I AM JIMMY KIMMEL
This is so hyper specific but every time I listen to the Okonokos version of Lay Low, when he says “pass out on the bedroom floor,” what I hear is, “gettin’ high on the doo doo boat.”
Been thinking this for like 15 years. It’s 2:33am.
Been thinking this for like 15 years. It’s 2:33am.
September 14, 2025 at 6:33 AM
This is so hyper specific but every time I listen to the Okonokos version of Lay Low, when he says “pass out on the bedroom floor,” what I hear is, “gettin’ high on the doo doo boat.”
Been thinking this for like 15 years. It’s 2:33am.
Been thinking this for like 15 years. It’s 2:33am.
Reposted by max fine Albany | oct 11
Do your mental health a favor and turn this on for today. You really don't want to watch this. It is awful.
settings > content & media > autoplay video & gifs = off
September 10, 2025 at 7:05 PM
Do your mental health a favor and turn this on for today. You really don't want to watch this. It is awful.
Reposted by max fine Albany | oct 11
the number of times in modern history when violence has become an increasingly normal part of politics and it's been a good thing that folks are happy about looking back on it, they're very limited
September 10, 2025 at 7:10 PM
the number of times in modern history when violence has become an increasingly normal part of politics and it's been a good thing that folks are happy about looking back on it, they're very limited
For about 3 months every year, I’m a full time comedian. For the other 9, I am a janitor with a dream that pays sometimes.
September 8, 2025 at 4:09 AM
For about 3 months every year, I’m a full time comedian. For the other 9, I am a janitor with a dream that pays sometimes.
Ugh, a bird just came on me. Only in New York!
August 31, 2025 at 9:56 PM
Ugh, a bird just came on me. Only in New York!
Took myself out on a date to an Italian restaurant that was empty. As soon as I sat at the bar and ordered a phony negroni, the bartender put on the “This is Elliott Smith” playlist. Best meal I’ve ever had.
August 31, 2025 at 1:20 AM
Took myself out on a date to an Italian restaurant that was empty. As soon as I sat at the bar and ordered a phony negroni, the bartender put on the “This is Elliott Smith” playlist. Best meal I’ve ever had.
Me, having never auditioned or submitted for SNL: “I wonder if they’re gonna call”
August 29, 2025 at 4:38 AM
Me, having never auditioned or submitted for SNL: “I wonder if they’re gonna call”
Make no mistake, I absolutely want to take away your guns
August 27, 2025 at 4:30 PM
Make no mistake, I absolutely want to take away your guns
Sex with me is like pizza. I usually come in a box.
August 24, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Sex with me is like pizza. I usually come in a box.
I am 33 years old and I have never had more than $2,500 in my bank account
August 22, 2025 at 11:10 PM
I am 33 years old and I have never had more than $2,500 in my bank account
Here are 5 albums I’m listening to this week, send me yours.
1. Bear Vs. Shark - Terrorhawk
2. Dijon - Baby
3. Elvis - Speedway
4. The Band - The Last Waltz
5. Coheed and Cambria - The Second Stage Turbine Blade
1. Bear Vs. Shark - Terrorhawk
2. Dijon - Baby
3. Elvis - Speedway
4. The Band - The Last Waltz
5. Coheed and Cambria - The Second Stage Turbine Blade
August 21, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Here are 5 albums I’m listening to this week, send me yours.
1. Bear Vs. Shark - Terrorhawk
2. Dijon - Baby
3. Elvis - Speedway
4. The Band - The Last Waltz
5. Coheed and Cambria - The Second Stage Turbine Blade
1. Bear Vs. Shark - Terrorhawk
2. Dijon - Baby
3. Elvis - Speedway
4. The Band - The Last Waltz
5. Coheed and Cambria - The Second Stage Turbine Blade
Reposted by max fine Albany | oct 11
Oh hey!
Relationshit, my storytelling and onstage therapy show with real therapists is happening this Saturday the 23rd at 5pm at QED in Astoria!
Featuring:
David Lawson
@mattstorrs.bsky.social
@maxfine.bsky.social
Wilson McDermut
AND MORE?!
qedastoria.com/products/rel...
Relationshit, my storytelling and onstage therapy show with real therapists is happening this Saturday the 23rd at 5pm at QED in Astoria!
Featuring:
David Lawson
@mattstorrs.bsky.social
@maxfine.bsky.social
Wilson McDermut
AND MORE?!
qedastoria.com/products/rel...
Relationsh*t!
Hosted by Lynn Bixenspan and Morgan Pielli, Relationshit features a mix of stories about all kinds of relationships and good old-fashioned new-fangled advice from REAL-LIFE THERAPISTS ONSTAGE. Featuri...
qedastoria.com
August 19, 2025 at 8:27 PM
Oh hey!
Relationshit, my storytelling and onstage therapy show with real therapists is happening this Saturday the 23rd at 5pm at QED in Astoria!
Featuring:
David Lawson
@mattstorrs.bsky.social
@maxfine.bsky.social
Wilson McDermut
AND MORE?!
qedastoria.com/products/rel...
Relationshit, my storytelling and onstage therapy show with real therapists is happening this Saturday the 23rd at 5pm at QED in Astoria!
Featuring:
David Lawson
@mattstorrs.bsky.social
@maxfine.bsky.social
Wilson McDermut
AND MORE?!
qedastoria.com/products/rel...
Hello ladies- it would seem that they’re filming The Devil Wears Prada 2 on my block this week if anyone wants to have sex with me
August 17, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Hello ladies- it would seem that they’re filming The Devil Wears Prada 2 on my block this week if anyone wants to have sex with me
Y’all called me crazy when I voted for Cynthia Nixon in the 2018 race for governor. You laughed at me. But if you all got your shit together we could have avoided And Just Like That AND Andrew Cuomo.
August 16, 2025 at 4:10 AM
Y’all called me crazy when I voted for Cynthia Nixon in the 2018 race for governor. You laughed at me. But if you all got your shit together we could have avoided And Just Like That AND Andrew Cuomo.
I believe there was only one Cosmo ordered in the entire run of AJLT
August 15, 2025 at 8:16 PM
I believe there was only one Cosmo ordered in the entire run of AJLT
Reposted by max fine Albany | oct 11
Sickening. Every journalist in America should think deeply about the fact that most American politicians are willing to accept and indeed facilitate the murder of our colleagues.
never take freedom of the press or access to news for granted. www.aljazeera.com/news/2025/8/...
August 11, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Sickening. Every journalist in America should think deeply about the fact that most American politicians are willing to accept and indeed facilitate the murder of our colleagues.
