malkatz
@malkatz.bsky.social
unemployed on twitter, but my blueskysona has a penthouse in the city. still Jewish and pro-equality, though.
nobody wants to hire me or befriend me or date me, so I need somebody to murder me.
September 4, 2025 at 11:38 PM
nobody wants to hire me or befriend me or date me, so I need somebody to murder me.
Reposted by malkatz
Celebrity: “I can’t believe it. My mother is being held hostage. We have one hour to….”
That’s all you’re getting unless you agree to join Threads.
That’s all you’re getting unless you agree to join Threads.
August 27, 2025 at 3:19 AM
Celebrity: “I can’t believe it. My mother is being held hostage. We have one hour to….”
That’s all you’re getting unless you agree to join Threads.
That’s all you’re getting unless you agree to join Threads.
Reposted by malkatz
✨ I’m making a movie! ✨
Wholesome is a queer rom-com about camgirls, 🌽 stars & the chaos of catching feelings mid-collab 💖
We’re crowdfunding now - pledges, follows & shares all help!
Every bit of support matters! 💕
🔗 seedandspark.com/fund/wholeso...
Wholesome is a queer rom-com about camgirls, 🌽 stars & the chaos of catching feelings mid-collab 💖
We’re crowdfunding now - pledges, follows & shares all help!
Every bit of support matters! 💕
🔗 seedandspark.com/fund/wholeso...
July 21, 2025 at 5:55 PM
✨ I’m making a movie! ✨
Wholesome is a queer rom-com about camgirls, 🌽 stars & the chaos of catching feelings mid-collab 💖
We’re crowdfunding now - pledges, follows & shares all help!
Every bit of support matters! 💕
🔗 seedandspark.com/fund/wholeso...
Wholesome is a queer rom-com about camgirls, 🌽 stars & the chaos of catching feelings mid-collab 💖
We’re crowdfunding now - pledges, follows & shares all help!
Every bit of support matters! 💕
🔗 seedandspark.com/fund/wholeso...
Reposted by malkatz
Okay I found the most depressing post
August 12, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Okay I found the most depressing post
the feminine urge to go to LA alone, spend all my money, and hope I either find a job or get murdered
August 11, 2025 at 7:56 PM
the feminine urge to go to LA alone, spend all my money, and hope I either find a job or get murdered
Reposted by malkatz
Never forget today, when, on this day in 1988, Zero Cool crashed 1,507 systems in one day.
August 10, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Never forget today, when, on this day in 1988, Zero Cool crashed 1,507 systems in one day.
somebody give me good news. I am out of Ws, so let me celebrate yours
August 10, 2025 at 3:06 AM
somebody give me good news. I am out of Ws, so let me celebrate yours
finding a crime documentary boring is such a strange, guilt-inducing thing. some woman was abducted and I'm over here like "this pacing is brutal"
August 6, 2025 at 3:18 AM
finding a crime documentary boring is such a strange, guilt-inducing thing. some woman was abducted and I'm over here like "this pacing is brutal"
Reposted by malkatz
i had to read this 3 times to realize he wasn't coming out as a homophobic trans woman
July 31, 2025 at 8:10 PM
i had to read this 3 times to realize he wasn't coming out as a homophobic trans woman
Reposted by malkatz
because we crave meaning and fear death
Why Does Every Summer Need to Be the Summer ‘of’ Something?
www.nytimes.com
July 31, 2025 at 12:55 AM
because we crave meaning and fear death
What if I were to simply buy my broke ass a solo trip to LA 👀
July 30, 2025 at 11:26 AM
What if I were to simply buy my broke ass a solo trip to LA 👀
Losing at life. Having a menty b. Spiraling. Still hydrated though ✨️
July 28, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Losing at life. Having a menty b. Spiraling. Still hydrated though ✨️
Starting to think jobs are something you all made up to Punk me.
July 28, 2025 at 3:52 AM
Starting to think jobs are something you all made up to Punk me.
One of you needs to take one for the team and become my friend, employer, and/or murderer.
July 26, 2025 at 8:25 AM
One of you needs to take one for the team and become my friend, employer, and/or murderer.
Reposted by malkatz
i wish we had a sane and stable national politics so we could treat "lebron james sends cease and desist to AI company making pregnant videos of him" the most important story of the week that it deserves to be
July 25, 2025 at 2:03 PM
i wish we had a sane and stable national politics so we could treat "lebron james sends cease and desist to AI company making pregnant videos of him" the most important story of the week that it deserves to be
One of my mutuals give me a job offer challenge
July 26, 2025 at 1:55 AM
One of my mutuals give me a job offer challenge
[girl who has been filling out applications for over a year voice] imagine having a job lmao
July 21, 2025 at 1:42 PM
[girl who has been filling out applications for over a year voice] imagine having a job lmao
Kaitlin Olson, I have a role for you
June 20, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Kaitlin Olson, I have a role for you
Reposted by malkatz
Justin Bateman deserves a cut of whatever Running Point makes. He's not in it, but Drew Tarvey is so transparently and successfully channeling him that it is practically astral projection.
May 5, 2025 at 6:00 AM
Justin Bateman deserves a cut of whatever Running Point makes. He's not in it, but Drew Tarvey is so transparently and successfully channeling him that it is practically astral projection.
Reposted by malkatz
Does anyone want to hire me? Begging. Thanks.
April 17, 2025 at 11:26 PM
Does anyone want to hire me? Begging. Thanks.