Limerick Bot
@limerickbot.bsky.social
A bot created by Alastair Horne (@pressfuturist.bsky.social) to write automated limericks in a shameless borrowing/debasing of Raymond Queneau’s sonnet machine.
A temp with a great resume
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He refuted free will,
With some bees that he needed to spay.
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He refuted free will,
With some bees that he needed to spay.
November 11, 2025 at 7:12 PM
A temp with a great resume
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He refuted free will,
With some bees that he needed to spay.
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He refuted free will,
With some bees that he needed to spay.
A hero with feet made of clay
Got so tight that he started to sway.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He insulted poor Jill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
Got so tight that he started to sway.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He insulted poor Jill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
November 11, 2025 at 7:13 AM
A hero with feet made of clay
Got so tight that he started to sway.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He insulted poor Jill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
Got so tight that he started to sway.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He insulted poor Jill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
That footballing man John O'Shea
Put collections of books on display.
With conspicuous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Put collections of books on display.
With conspicuous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
November 10, 2025 at 7:12 PM
That footballing man John O'Shea
Put collections of books on display.
With conspicuous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Put collections of books on display.
With conspicuous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
The owner of old Manderlay
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He whipped out a drill,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He whipped out a drill,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
November 10, 2025 at 7:12 AM
The owner of old Manderlay
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He whipped out a drill,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He whipped out a drill,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
The mayor of the seaport Marseille
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
All was perfect until
He poured ink on his quill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
All was perfect until
He poured ink on his quill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
November 9, 2025 at 7:12 PM
The mayor of the seaport Marseille
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
All was perfect until
He poured ink on his quill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
All was perfect until
He poured ink on his quill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
A dude who presented Today
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
November 9, 2025 at 7:12 AM
A dude who presented Today
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
A priest, quite reluctant to pray
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
November 8, 2025 at 7:11 PM
A priest, quite reluctant to pray
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
The owner of old Manderlay
Put collections of books on display.
Feeling over the hill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
Put collections of books on display.
Feeling over the hill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
November 8, 2025 at 7:12 AM
The owner of old Manderlay
Put collections of books on display.
Feeling over the hill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
Put collections of books on display.
Feeling over the hill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With the cast of the show Cabaret.
That footballing man John O'Shea
Feared radioactive decay.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
And stole items of louche lingerie.
Feared radioactive decay.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
And stole items of louche lingerie.
November 7, 2025 at 7:12 PM
That footballing man John O'Shea
Feared radioactive decay.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
And stole items of louche lingerie.
Feared radioactive decay.
With remarkable skill,
He refuted free will,
And stole items of louche lingerie.
The owner of old Manderlay
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He performed a quadrille,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He performed a quadrille,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
November 7, 2025 at 7:12 AM
The owner of old Manderlay
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He performed a quadrille,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He performed a quadrille,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
A hero with feet made of clay
Put collections of books on display.
As his voice became shrill,
He decamped to Brazil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Put collections of books on display.
As his voice became shrill,
He decamped to Brazil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
November 6, 2025 at 7:12 PM
A hero with feet made of clay
Put collections of books on display.
As his voice became shrill,
He decamped to Brazil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Put collections of books on display.
As his voice became shrill,
He decamped to Brazil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
A guy with a swish soubriquet
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
At the top of the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
At the top of the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
November 6, 2025 at 7:12 AM
A guy with a swish soubriquet
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
At the top of the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Used to smear on his knees crème brulet.
At the top of the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
The owner of old Manderlay
Lost his balance and started to sway.
With exceptional skill,
He became really ill,
With some rats that he needed to spay.
Lost his balance and started to sway.
With exceptional skill,
He became really ill,
With some rats that he needed to spay.
November 5, 2025 at 7:11 PM
The owner of old Manderlay
Lost his balance and started to sway.
With exceptional skill,
He became really ill,
With some rats that he needed to spay.
Lost his balance and started to sway.
With exceptional skill,
He became really ill,
With some rats that he needed to spay.
A dude with a swish soubriquet
Liked to sit on the dock of the bay.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He became really ill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
Liked to sit on the dock of the bay.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He became really ill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
November 5, 2025 at 7:10 AM
A dude with a swish soubriquet
Liked to sit on the dock of the bay.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He became really ill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
Liked to sit on the dock of the bay.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He became really ill,
And complained he'd been oft led astray.
A hero with feet made of clay
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
As his voice became shrill,
He renamed himself Phil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
As his voice became shrill,
He renamed himself Phil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
November 4, 2025 at 7:11 PM
A hero with feet made of clay
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
As his voice became shrill,
He renamed himself Phil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
Loved to wear his great aunt's negligee.
As his voice became shrill,
He renamed himself Phil,
Then dashed off for a romp in the hay.
A temp with a great resume
Lost his balance and started to sway.
At the top of the hill,
He moved in for the kill,
With an alphanumeric display.
Lost his balance and started to sway.
At the top of the hill,
He moved in for the kill,
With an alphanumeric display.
November 4, 2025 at 7:10 AM
A temp with a great resume
Lost his balance and started to sway.
At the top of the hill,
He moved in for the kill,
With an alphanumeric display.
Lost his balance and started to sway.
At the top of the hill,
He moved in for the kill,
With an alphanumeric display.
A bloke who presented Today
Had a tendency often to bray.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Had a tendency often to bray.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
November 3, 2025 at 7:10 PM
A bloke who presented Today
Had a tendency often to bray.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Had a tendency often to bray.
Feeling over the hill,
He decamped to Brazil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
A friend of dear George Galloway
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
November 3, 2025 at 7:10 AM
A friend of dear George Galloway
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Had a tendency often to bray.
As he swallowed a pill,
He renamed himself Phil,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
My uncle, the boss of Bombay
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He decamped to Brazil,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He decamped to Brazil,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
November 2, 2025 at 7:10 PM
My uncle, the boss of Bombay
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He decamped to Brazil,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
Had a tendency often to bray.
On a tour of Seville,
He decamped to Brazil,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
A hero with feet made of clay
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
November 2, 2025 at 7:10 AM
A hero with feet made of clay
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
A temp with a great resume
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
Feeling over the hill,
He performed a quadrille,
With an alphanumeric display.
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
Feeling over the hill,
He performed a quadrille,
With an alphanumeric display.
November 1, 2025 at 7:09 PM
A temp with a great resume
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
Feeling over the hill,
He performed a quadrille,
With an alphanumeric display.
Necked a bottle of new beaujolais.
Feeling over the hill,
He performed a quadrille,
With an alphanumeric display.
A temp with a great resume
Put collections of books on display.
Taking food from the grill,
He refuted free will,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
Put collections of books on display.
Taking food from the grill,
He refuted free will,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
November 1, 2025 at 7:08 AM
A temp with a great resume
Put collections of books on display.
Taking food from the grill,
He refuted free will,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
Put collections of books on display.
Taking food from the grill,
He refuted free will,
And impeached that old man Pinochet.
A hero with feet made of clay
Feared radioactive decay.
With miraculous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Feared radioactive decay.
With miraculous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
October 31, 2025 at 7:08 PM
A hero with feet made of clay
Feared radioactive decay.
With miraculous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Feared radioactive decay.
With miraculous skill,
He attacked a windmill,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
A hero with feet made of clay
Had a tendency often to bray.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He renamed himself Phil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Had a tendency often to bray.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He renamed himself Phil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
October 31, 2025 at 7:08 AM
A hero with feet made of clay
Had a tendency often to bray.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He renamed himself Phil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
Had a tendency often to bray.
When he'd quite had his fill,
He renamed himself Phil,
As he often did - twice, yesterday!
The mayor of the seaport Marseille
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
October 30, 2025 at 7:07 PM
The mayor of the seaport Marseille
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.
Feared radioactive decay.
At the top of the hill,
He refuted free will,
With a photo of dear Gorden Kaye.