readjusted meds so i had a terrible crisis yesterday, ended up in the ER to see if they could calm me down... I went walking for 4 hours straight because I felt unsafe...

Plus I've been readjusting to losing some people, either to life being incompatible or death so I've been grieving a lot of things this year. Been rebuilding my circle slowly too so it doesn't overwhelm me too.

i was too shy to ask for one... he just heard i needed something to decompress and started motivating me in looking for something and getting it
big steps in my book!!!!

Like what's the point of trying to be anything at all... I won't ever be not depressed or burnout...

i always make the mistake of feeling comfortable

BUT im happy with my partner and REAL friends and I've had many beautiful experiences this year too so I don't regret a thing

It really has been one thing after the other this year jeez when will this enddd

and i will always say: real stock images are way better looking than ai slop

plus im not against ai as a developmental tool, cuz not much you can do there cuz sometimes you need them, but dont defend pointless gen ai ???? like what do you need an image of you and your younger self for that you cant do by yourself? editing is not that hard ffs

goes to say, they are unemployed atm so its not like they actively work with them which then i would understand making a point of it but you dont have a job at it and you're defending it? weird.

i also find this discussion dumb, cuz you shouldnt be preferring ai over your partner unless your partner is really shitty and it makes me think... am i really that worthless?

they said "but it literally my field of work" i dont care?? find a better one?? is not even their work and they can do so much else (the field is so broad do they have to go for ai exclusively??) and it shouldnt be that hard a choice between a bunch of machines and someone you say you really love???

all of this bc partner thinks they can't stop using ai and i got mad cuz i told them i cant stand by it and its honestly a dealbreaker for me