Kelly Laudenslager
@kellylaudenslager.bsky.social
Wife to Eric. Mama to 3. Voracious reader, seminary student, part-time editor, passable knitter. 7w6.
Blocking the shawl I made for a friend. (It's a prayer shawl because I prayed for her while I was knitting it, and because I know she prays regularly for her community and might need a pretty shawl to keep her warm while she does.) Just need to weave in a few ends and send it on its way! 🧶
October 30, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Blocking the shawl I made for a friend. (It's a prayer shawl because I prayed for her while I was knitting it, and because I know she prays regularly for her community and might need a pretty shawl to keep her warm while she does.) Just need to weave in a few ends and send it on its way! 🧶
The joke I've been waiting for since I took White Collar Crime in 2009.
Every lawyer should get the day off in observance of the fact that they actually failed to indict a ham sandwich
Federal prosecutors on Tuesday were unable to secure a felony assault indictment against a man who threw a sandwich at a federal agent on the streets of Washington this month, according to two people familiar with the matter.
August 27, 2025 at 4:41 PM
The joke I've been waiting for since I took White Collar Crime in 2009.
N Lock Ness, Scotland
S Lusaka, Zambia
E Lusaka, Zambia
W Kauai, HI
Do you count the same place if it's the farthest in two directions? 🤔
S Lusaka, Zambia
E Lusaka, Zambia
W Kauai, HI
Do you count the same place if it's the farthest in two directions? 🤔
N Þingvellir NP, Iceland
S Tampa, FL, US
E Andong, Rep of Korea
W Grand Canyon NP, AZ, US
...I really need to work on those western and southern points.
S Tampa, FL, US
E Andong, Rep of Korea
W Grand Canyon NP, AZ, US
...I really need to work on those western and southern points.
N Duluth, MN
S Sanibel Island FL
E Cape May, NJ
W San Francisco, CA
S Sanibel Island FL
E Cape May, NJ
W San Francisco, CA
August 8, 2025 at 4:50 PM
N Lock Ness, Scotland
S Lusaka, Zambia
E Lusaka, Zambia
W Kauai, HI
Do you count the same place if it's the farthest in two directions? 🤔
S Lusaka, Zambia
E Lusaka, Zambia
W Kauai, HI
Do you count the same place if it's the farthest in two directions? 🤔
I love that it gets progressively deranged as you go from West to East. Like you asked someone from Colorado to label a map of the East Coast.
August 8, 2025 at 1:44 PM
I love that it gets progressively deranged as you go from West to East. Like you asked someone from Colorado to label a map of the East Coast.
My mom learned to type on a typewriter and is the slowest yet most accurate typist I've ever seen. I'm high school, I learned to type while chatting with my crushes on AIM and typed with the wild abandon of a drunk monkey, constantly backspacing to fix my mistakes, and was still faster than my mom.
Every single gen X scrub had two years of high school typing class and hunt and pecks 20 wpm. Every single millennial never had formal instruction and types perfect form 100 wpm because of AIM
August 4, 2025 at 11:35 PM
My mom learned to type on a typewriter and is the slowest yet most accurate typist I've ever seen. I'm high school, I learned to type while chatting with my crushes on AIM and typed with the wild abandon of a drunk monkey, constantly backspacing to fix my mistakes, and was still faster than my mom.
Incredibly relatable
Asked the kids if someone could hand me my book and now everyone is fighting over who gets to hand me my book
July 7, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Incredibly relatable
Had to say goodbye to close neighbors today. We live in a seminary community, so this isn't the first time, but this one hit the hardest so far. Our kids have grown up together for the last 4 years and everyone is feeling it. I'm thankful for the friendship, but this is hard.
July 2, 2025 at 3:46 PM
Had to say goodbye to close neighbors today. We live in a seminary community, so this isn't the first time, but this one hit the hardest so far. Our kids have grown up together for the last 4 years and everyone is feeling it. I'm thankful for the friendship, but this is hard.
So proud of my kids! We ran a 5k here in town that we did basically no prep for, it was hot (and humid!) and they did it! They encouraged each other and kept going. They even wanted to go on a walk with their friends when it was over lol. Big family win.
June 28, 2025 at 3:46 PM
So proud of my kids! We ran a 5k here in town that we did basically no prep for, it was hot (and humid!) and they did it! They encouraged each other and kept going. They even wanted to go on a walk with their friends when it was over lol. Big family win.
Please do not trust an AI-generated shortcut with your life. Because that's what this amounts to.
"AllTrails has a new generative AI feature that can be asked to 'shorten my route' or 'make this more scenic.'
But the people in charge of searching for lost hikers say the feature is going to exacerbate an issue they’ve been warning about for years: hiking apps providing false information."
But the people in charge of searching for lost hikers say the feature is going to exacerbate an issue they’ve been warning about for years: hiking apps providing false information."
AllTrails launches AI route-making tool, worrying search-and-rescue members
One of the world’s most popular hiking apps has a new generative AI feature that can be asked to "shorten my route" or "make this more scenic." But the people in charge of searching for lost hikers sa...
www.nationalobserver.com
June 20, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Please do not trust an AI-generated shortcut with your life. Because that's what this amounts to.
Can't roll my eyes hard enough at ridiculous parenting "tips" like this. You're already at the beach, the best place to just mess around and have the best time ever!
Irrationally mad at a Tik Tok I saw where a mom was like “pro-tip: bring water colors paint to the beach so kids can paint sea shells.” NO! The activity at the beach is Beach!!!! We do not need to do art and crafts with our kids AT THE BEACH. Go dig a hole!!!!
June 1, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Can't roll my eyes hard enough at ridiculous parenting "tips" like this. You're already at the beach, the best place to just mess around and have the best time ever!
Reposted by Kelly Laudenslager
Reposted by Kelly Laudenslager
Cassocks are red
Conclaves are dope
Wake up babe we got a
Conclaves are dope
Wake up babe we got a
May 8, 2025 at 6:40 PM
Cassocks are red
Conclaves are dope
Wake up babe we got a
Conclaves are dope
Wake up babe we got a
I keep second-guessing my own reactions, because everyone else seems calm, am I just overreacting? I think the answer is no, and my training as a lawyer emphasizes that these are huge problems.
It's genuinely hard to express to sort of normal not politically plugged in non-lawyers *how* lawless the Trump administration is, and I think that's some part of the problem.
You sound like you're hyperventilating, but it's just a flat description of what is going on.
You sound like you're hyperventilating, but it's just a flat description of what is going on.
April 15, 2025 at 8:01 PM
I keep second-guessing my own reactions, because everyone else seems calm, am I just overreacting? I think the answer is no, and my training as a lawyer emphasizes that these are huge problems.
Check this out if you love art and/or being human.
Today is the 5 year anniversary to when I slowly started losing my mind during the pandemic and began dressing up as works of art.
As my Twitter account has long been abandoned, why not make a thread of my madness on BlueSky?
This was “The Maid” by Wilhelm August Lebrecht Amberg, from 1862
As my Twitter account has long been abandoned, why not make a thread of my madness on BlueSky?
This was “The Maid” by Wilhelm August Lebrecht Amberg, from 1862
April 6, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Check this out if you love art and/or being human.
This is the good stuff. Like Twitter in the old days.
I have tariffed
the penguins
that are on
Heard Island
and which
you were probably
assuming
did not export goods
forgive me
they were taking advantage of us
so cunning
and so cold
the penguins
that are on
Heard Island
and which
you were probably
assuming
did not export goods
forgive me
they were taking advantage of us
so cunning
and so cold
April 3, 2025 at 9:29 PM
This is the good stuff. Like Twitter in the old days.
Reposted by Kelly Laudenslager
Hobbit Girl Spring is here. 😌🌿
March 29, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Hobbit Girl Spring is here. 😌🌿
It's true! I talked with the owner of my local yarn store and she said business has been booming since January...
Every left-leaning woman in your life is getting heavy into arts and crafts right now because they don’t know what else to do with their rage
March 17, 2025 at 2:27 AM
It's true! I talked with the owner of my local yarn store and she said business has been booming since January...
Reposted by Kelly Laudenslager
Many people want to imagine being a “hobbit at heart” as sitting around eating strawberries in the grass. But they forget how hard-won those strawberries are.
We think of Hobbits as quaint, but there is strength hidden within them that would rival the greatest elf-lord.
1/5
We think of Hobbits as quaint, but there is strength hidden within them that would rival the greatest elf-lord.
1/5
March 13, 2025 at 3:56 AM
Many people want to imagine being a “hobbit at heart” as sitting around eating strawberries in the grass. But they forget how hard-won those strawberries are.
We think of Hobbits as quaint, but there is strength hidden within them that would rival the greatest elf-lord.
1/5
We think of Hobbits as quaint, but there is strength hidden within them that would rival the greatest elf-lord.
1/5
Last week it was finally light outside when our kids were waiting for the bus. Glad we're not doing THAT anymore! 🫠
GIVE THAT HOUR BACK YOU BASTARDS
March 9, 2025 at 1:07 PM
Last week it was finally light outside when our kids were waiting for the bus. Glad we're not doing THAT anymore! 🫠
This is an absolutely disgusting attempt to control a private university! Could they also forbid Georgetown from referring to Catholic teaching in the classroom? I hope my alma mater stands firm.
The US Attorney in Washington DC is investigating Georgetown Law School, demanding that "if DEI is found in your courses or teaching in anyway [sic]," the law school should "move swiftly to remove it"
Federal prosecutors don’t control the classroom. This is a dark abdication of the First Amendment.
Federal prosecutors don’t control the classroom. This is a dark abdication of the First Amendment.
March 6, 2025 at 6:10 PM
This is an absolutely disgusting attempt to control a private university! Could they also forbid Georgetown from referring to Catholic teaching in the classroom? I hope my alma mater stands firm.
I clerked for a federal judge and had an excellent experience. But that was only because my judge cared about giving his clerks a good experience, the work environment was entirely molded by him. And I definitely heard stories from other clerks...
Federal law court clerks grapple with bullying and abuse - an NPR investigation
www.npr.org/2025/03/01/n...
www.npr.org/2025/03/01/n...
In the federal court system, law clerks find little recourse for bullying and abuse
An NPR investigation finds federal judges have enormous influence with few checks on their power. Law clerks and other judicial employees are vulnerable to mistreatment and have few job protections.
www.npr.org
March 1, 2025 at 8:18 PM
I clerked for a federal judge and had an excellent experience. But that was only because my judge cared about giving his clerks a good experience, the work environment was entirely molded by him. And I definitely heard stories from other clerks...
Reposted by Kelly Laudenslager
This might be helpful for my husband. (I'm the one still sitting at the table, every single time.)
March 1, 2025 at 1:54 PM
This might be helpful for my husband. (I'm the one still sitting at the table, every single time.)