🥔 Kartoffel Wolf 🐺
@kartoffelwolf.bsky.social
Smol gecko wizard who has a crippling addiction to breakfast foods and drinks
*me after the first rain of every city I've moved to*
"This city looks much better when it's raining"
"This city looks much better when it's raining"
December 4, 2025 at 10:32 AM
*me after the first rain of every city I've moved to*
"This city looks much better when it's raining"
"This city looks much better when it's raining"
I spent a lot of time in AOL chat rooms. We can't warn them because they are patient zero
November 28, 2025 at 10:44 AM
I spent a lot of time in AOL chat rooms. We can't warn them because they are patient zero
*News reports outrageous story*
Me: what's the evidence for this?
Internet: the guy who profits the most from this narrative says so
Me: that's not evidence, what if he's lying?
Internet: oh my god! You think he'd lie about that!? It really says a lot about YOU that you would think that!
Me: what's the evidence for this?
Internet: the guy who profits the most from this narrative says so
Me: that's not evidence, what if he's lying?
Internet: oh my god! You think he'd lie about that!? It really says a lot about YOU that you would think that!
November 27, 2025 at 10:55 AM
*News reports outrageous story*
Me: what's the evidence for this?
Internet: the guy who profits the most from this narrative says so
Me: that's not evidence, what if he's lying?
Internet: oh my god! You think he'd lie about that!? It really says a lot about YOU that you would think that!
Me: what's the evidence for this?
Internet: the guy who profits the most from this narrative says so
Me: that's not evidence, what if he's lying?
Internet: oh my god! You think he'd lie about that!? It really says a lot about YOU that you would think that!
If there a nine nazi's at the table, and you sit with them. There are ten nazi's at the table
November 24, 2025 at 12:36 PM
If there a nine nazi's at the table, and you sit with them. There are ten nazi's at the table
Big Iron is a great song, I love it so much
But in the genre of gunslinger vs outlaw I think "Cattleman's Gun" is the superior song/tale, and I think it's unduly underrated
But in the genre of gunslinger vs outlaw I think "Cattleman's Gun" is the superior song/tale, and I think it's unduly underrated
November 19, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Big Iron is a great song, I love it so much
But in the genre of gunslinger vs outlaw I think "Cattleman's Gun" is the superior song/tale, and I think it's unduly underrated
But in the genre of gunslinger vs outlaw I think "Cattleman's Gun" is the superior song/tale, and I think it's unduly underrated
The sad thing is, the right probably cares more about the blow job rumor than they do the pedophilia
November 17, 2025 at 10:44 AM
The sad thing is, the right probably cares more about the blow job rumor than they do the pedophilia
"Who could have anticipated the GOP would defend child rape, over dropping Trump?"
The depressing realization when they start admitting that he slept with a sixteen year old and the discussion turns to "is that really that bad?"
November 17, 2025 at 9:07 AM
"Who could have anticipated the GOP would defend child rape, over dropping Trump?"
Can artists actually determine if their work is pretentious or not? I've seen many artists who decide their own works with that slur, but almost every artist who espouses that seem to make moving art that resonates with millions.
who actually determines if something is pretentious? Critics? Fans?
who actually determines if something is pretentious? Critics? Fans?
November 15, 2025 at 1:17 PM
Can artists actually determine if their work is pretentious or not? I've seen many artists who decide their own works with that slur, but almost every artist who espouses that seem to make moving art that resonates with millions.
who actually determines if something is pretentious? Critics? Fans?
who actually determines if something is pretentious? Critics? Fans?
@blizzard.com when are you going to add the Espresso Machiato dance to a playable race? Inquiring minds (me) want to know!
November 15, 2025 at 12:56 PM
@blizzard.com when are you going to add the Espresso Machiato dance to a playable race? Inquiring minds (me) want to know!
Is it any coincidence my last two posts were about fellatio? I like to think not
November 15, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Is it any coincidence my last two posts were about fellatio? I like to think not
People are saying Trump pardoned Santos so he could blow Santos in the gaudy oval office?
November 15, 2025 at 10:44 AM
People are saying Trump pardoned Santos so he could blow Santos in the gaudy oval office?
Schumer, really be out here like "OH you want to defend the only party capable of politically resisting the GOP from accusations of being controlled opposition? Well, I'm going to suck Trump off right at this podium and tell him it tastes like raspberries!"
November 13, 2025 at 11:36 AM
Schumer, really be out here like "OH you want to defend the only party capable of politically resisting the GOP from accusations of being controlled opposition? Well, I'm going to suck Trump off right at this podium and tell him it tastes like raspberries!"
"From bunker to bunker..." She nods. "Not anymore, no one cares now, I don't even have to hide. They think I'm another antisocial vagrant. I could walk straight into that town if I wanted. I just..." She falls silent, her gaze fixed on the shacks huddled together across the water.
November 12, 2025 at 9:36 AM
"From bunker to bunker..." She nods. "Not anymore, no one cares now, I don't even have to hide. They think I'm another antisocial vagrant. I could walk straight into that town if I wanted. I just..." She falls silent, her gaze fixed on the shacks huddled together across the water.
Progressives in SF: "I don't want Pelosi to put her national games ahead of her constituents. She has a responsibility to represent SF!"
Same people after the shutdown vote: "I don't care if the people in those senators' districts want them to end this. They have a national game to play!"
Same people after the shutdown vote: "I don't care if the people in those senators' districts want them to end this. They have a national game to play!"
November 12, 2025 at 9:19 AM
Progressives in SF: "I don't want Pelosi to put her national games ahead of her constituents. She has a responsibility to represent SF!"
Same people after the shutdown vote: "I don't care if the people in those senators' districts want them to end this. They have a national game to play!"
Same people after the shutdown vote: "I don't care if the people in those senators' districts want them to end this. They have a national game to play!"
*Three percent of the federally elected democrats broke with the rest of the party*
Online leftists: Guess I'll just kill myself then!!!!
Online leftists: Guess I'll just kill myself then!!!!
November 10, 2025 at 11:08 AM
*Three percent of the federally elected democrats broke with the rest of the party*
Online leftists: Guess I'll just kill myself then!!!!
Online leftists: Guess I'll just kill myself then!!!!
Call me Wario, because I'm always postin' dubble-u's
November 9, 2025 at 11:46 AM
Call me Wario, because I'm always postin' dubble-u's
Being a trans millennial is watching Kerrigan start as a pretty, respected, bad ass who gets morphed into a horrible monstrosity that is alien to her, and relating to that with your whole soul
November 3, 2025 at 12:45 PM
Being a trans millennial is watching Kerrigan start as a pretty, respected, bad ass who gets morphed into a horrible monstrosity that is alien to her, and relating to that with your whole soul
UwU mr.fascist, can I pwease have cibil wights? Mr.fascist can u pwease stahp viowading tha cownstatoosion? I won't do anything to stahp u, but can u pwease?
November 3, 2025 at 9:47 AM
UwU mr.fascist, can I pwease have cibil wights? Mr.fascist can u pwease stahp viowading tha cownstatoosion? I won't do anything to stahp u, but can u pwease?
Trump's goon fleeing to military bases while equating them to the zones in Iraq isn't a bad sign at all! Just don't think about it
October 30, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Trump's goon fleeing to military bases while equating them to the zones in Iraq isn't a bad sign at all! Just don't think about it
Farmers lost their soybean sales, Ranchers are paying through the nose because of tarrifs, and so Trump is talking about buying up Argentinian beef, and all of those EBT sales are about to dry up overnight. This could turn into a once in a century disaster
October 27, 2025 at 8:49 PM
Farmers lost their soybean sales, Ranchers are paying through the nose because of tarrifs, and so Trump is talking about buying up Argentinian beef, and all of those EBT sales are about to dry up overnight. This could turn into a once in a century disaster
Millennium Tower is a catastrophe waiting to happen, and the city seems content on pretending it's fine?
"OH the tower is tilting by twenty eight inches? We'll that's better than the thirty plus it was tilting before! It's sinking in the middle now? Uuuuh, that's fine, come buy a condo!"
"OH the tower is tilting by twenty eight inches? We'll that's better than the thirty plus it was tilting before! It's sinking in the middle now? Uuuuh, that's fine, come buy a condo!"
October 25, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Millennium Tower is a catastrophe waiting to happen, and the city seems content on pretending it's fine?
"OH the tower is tilting by twenty eight inches? We'll that's better than the thirty plus it was tilting before! It's sinking in the middle now? Uuuuh, that's fine, come buy a condo!"
"OH the tower is tilting by twenty eight inches? We'll that's better than the thirty plus it was tilting before! It's sinking in the middle now? Uuuuh, that's fine, come buy a condo!"
A million articles claiming "MAGA IS TURNING AGAINST TRUMP!!!!"?
Must be a day that ends with a y
Must be a day that ends with a y
October 11, 2025 at 9:48 AM
A million articles claiming "MAGA IS TURNING AGAINST TRUMP!!!!"?
Must be a day that ends with a y
Must be a day that ends with a y
I am so lonely. All the other Aeldari are scared of me. Noone talks to me. Noone wants to be my friend-- They think I am unstable. They send me from stage to stage performing atrocities in their name. And as I get better at it, they fear me more and more. I am a victim of my own success. Solitaire.
October 6, 2025 at 9:45 PM
I am so lonely. All the other Aeldari are scared of me. Noone talks to me. Noone wants to be my friend-- They think I am unstable. They send me from stage to stage performing atrocities in their name. And as I get better at it, they fear me more and more. I am a victim of my own success. Solitaire.
America subsidizing Argentinia's libertarian fever dream, allowing Argentina to cut their grains tax, so America's trade partners buy from Argentina instead will always be hilarious to me.
Trump is gutting American farmers while China reaps the rewards. I'm shocked this is not a bigger story.
Trump is gutting American farmers while China reaps the rewards. I'm shocked this is not a bigger story.
October 5, 2025 at 1:47 PM
America subsidizing Argentinia's libertarian fever dream, allowing Argentina to cut their grains tax, so America's trade partners buy from Argentina instead will always be hilarious to me.
Trump is gutting American farmers while China reaps the rewards. I'm shocked this is not a bigger story.
Trump is gutting American farmers while China reaps the rewards. I'm shocked this is not a bigger story.
The next Team Cherry game should have Sherma as the protagonist and be a rhythm game like Patapon
September 17, 2025 at 9:54 PM
The next Team Cherry game should have Sherma as the protagonist and be a rhythm game like Patapon