I confronted them about it and they said they forgot about my situation, but if you forgot…how did you remember that and say that? Even another moderator made an excuse for them.

something I think about a lot that was hurtful is me opening up to a mod about an abusive situation and they weren’t exactly feeling their best either during this. I joked saying that they have a vitamin deficiency. Which I don’t know that. They joke about my situation in front of people on call

Or how racially insensitive things were said, not purposefully, but unconsciously. I’d try pointing it out and explaining micro aggressions but I wasn’t taken seriously and often times made to look like I was exaggerating and what not.

Sometimes I felt like double standards were held. I was called aggressive when people themselves in that server joked around in the same manner. I never understood it, especially since they directed it at me too. I didn’t know why it was wrong when I did it back.

I meant to say *tendencies

They weren’t the reason as to why I relapsed or anything really. I had already been going through personal issues, stress, and losses of people in my family that I cared about. I never told them about those issues because they themselves were going through a hard time anyhow.

I was blamed for something I didn’t do either. Like, I never told my friend to tell a certain someone that I was having suicidal thoughts and trendies as well as relapsing. They told that person without me knowing and without me asking that because they made a post about me on twt that was rude.

I’m talking about this now publicly after coming to terms with how I feel after sitting down and reflecting for a bit.

I wasn’t 100% innocent, but the way they treated people and expected them to just brush it off was fucking horrible.

Literally in Oddwin’s server half the time just stealing shit 😭